


Untitled Spencer/OC Story

by Fangirl_1994



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/M, not sure where this is going yet, please give it a chance, writing as i go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-10
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-08-14 05:11:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 87,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7999828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangirl_1994/pseuds/Fangirl_1994
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not sure where this is going yet. It starts at the begging of season 8. Penelope gets an intern when Alex Blake arrives. She is interested in Spencer Reid, but doesn't tell him and then Mavea happens. I will update this when I know where I want this story to go :) Please give it a chance.<br/>This is also on fanfiction.net</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 8X1

This will start at the beginning of season eight. When Alex Blake joins the BAU, they also get a technical analysis intern to work with Penelope Garcia.

I don't own Criminal Minds or Doctor Who.  
~~~~~

I slowly open my eyes and look around. For a second I wonder where I was at, but remembered the past few days. I had moved from New York to Quantico to work in the BAU. When I told my parents that I was moving to Quantico to work for the FBI they got really worried. I had to calm their nerves and tell them I was just the technical analysis intern and that I wouldn't be going into the field anyways. I didn't have to do the FBI academy training, which I was happy about.

I get up and slowly walk to the bathroom. I was not a morning person and knew I wouldn't like waking up at 5:30 every morning, but I knew that this would be the best place for an internship. I get dressed in a grey skirt and black bottom up top. I also knew I wouldn't like wearing this type of clothes every day, but again, this is a great opportunity. I look in the mirror and frown. I was only 5'3" and 200 pounds, which means I was on the heavy side. I have always had a problem with my weight but I never did anything about it. I would exercise and eat right for a while, but then I would give it up. That was why I was happy about not having to do the FBI academy training because I knew I wouldn't pass it.

After my ten-minute drive to the BAU, I get out and make my way into the building and see a group of people. There was a blonde woman in a grey union jack dress, a tall lean African American man, a skinny blonde woman, an older brunette woman, and a talk lanky man with a cardigan on.

"He even used his own kid to bait the victims" The older brunette was saying to the African American man.

"Well, we've seen that before. No doubt we'll see it again." He replied to her.

I took my chance and walked up to them. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but I'm looking for Penelope Garcia and Aaron Hotchner."

They all looked at me and the blonde woman in the union jack dress smiled cautiously at me. "I'm Penelope Garcia. How can I help you?"

"Oh! I'm Gwendolyn England." I tell her. She gave me no recognition and I frowned. "I'm your new intern. I am starting today. Did no one tell you?"

"No one did sweetie. I'm sorry. I just got back from London so I'm a little out of touched but Hotch will be coming in soon and can explain everything." She says and looks behind me. "And here he comes."

"Don't unpack." An older Italian man said as he walked by us.

"Garcia, the files." Another older man said as he passed by.

She looks at me and frowns. "Gwen, come with me. I guess you are getting thrown in." She says and starts walking off. I look at the others and smile, then follow Penelope. We get to a room and Penelope opens the door and all I can see is computer screens.

"Wow computer supreme." I say and smile at all the screens. "This is like my dream made come true. Is this where you work every day?"

"Yes. This is my lair." Penelope says with a grin on her face. "We need find all the files on the Silencer case from 2004 and we need to send them to the team. We need to do this fast. Like yesterday fast. Can you help me?"

"I'm here for you to help. What should I do?" I ask.

She looks around at all the computer screens and then at her laptop. "Okay, log into the laptop and go on the government databases and tell me the file names and send them to me. I will then make sure they are all there and then I will send them to the team. Got it?"

I nod and get to work.  
~~~~~~~  
Most of the day had passed before we heard anything. Penelope and I had dug into the Silencer's files and tried to figure out who he was and what was his motive, but we hadn't got anywhere. I could see Penelope getting worried about her team. She had explained to me over a quick lunch that the team was her family. She also told me that I was now part of that family but I wasn't too sure. She wasn't including the new agent, Alex Blake, in her family yet, so I wasn't sure how I was already included when Agent Blake hadn't. I wasn't going to let anything side track me from trying to figure out this criminal and get Penelope's family back. I was already getting use to her and I could tell that we were going to be good friends but I wasn't going to jump the gun.

I hear a phone ring and see Penelope jump at the phone and push a pen on a button. "You have not called me all day." She says to the person on the other line.

"Seriously?" I hear a man say. I could tell it was Derek Morgan from this morning. Penelope told me all about them all.

"Now that superwoman is on the case, you don't need me, huh?" Penelope replied. I smirked at her and laughed softly.

"Okay, you know what? I'm going to chalk that up to a little jet lag and let's state this thing over." Morgan says. "Ring ring. I'm looking for my baby girl."

"Your wish is my command." She says reluctantly.

"There you go. That's much better." Morgan says. "I need Blake's number."

"Seriously!? Are you kidding?!" She yells over the speaker.

"Hotch asked me to call her." Morgan says desperately. I could tell that Morgan really wanted to make Penelope happy but he needed that number. I was already getting my phone out to give him the number. I grabbed all the numbers off of their files.

"So call Reid." Penelope says softly. "He's probably glued to her."

"All right, that is unnecessary roughness." Morgan says. "You, my sweet, need to settle down."

"No, I know, I know." Penelope says, sounding very sad. "I just-I I thought this would be easier." I knew she was talking about the Agent Prentiss, who was here before Agent Blake was.

"I know." Morgan says, also sounding very sad. I could tell that they were all very close and was missing Agent Prentiss. "So did I." Penelope sighs and frowns. I had just sent Morgan the number for Agent Blake. "Garcia, Blake's number?"

"I just sent it." I tell them both. Penelope looks back at me and smiles.

"Gwen just sent it." Penelope tells him.

"I heard. Thank you, Short Fry." He says. "Thank you, My Lady."

"You're welcome, my love." Penelope says.

"Welcome." I say.

Penelope hangs up and frowns at me and says quietly. "Ohh"

"I'm sorry Penelope." I tell her softly.

She smiles at me and nods. "I'll be fine Gwen. We all will in time." She turns back to her computer and goes back to our mission.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
The next day, I meet Penelope at the office and smile at her. "No word on the team?" I ask her and she just shakes her head. "Okay, what do we do today?"

"We keep doing the same thing." She tells me and we go back to the lair.

We keep looking into the victims and after a while, we get a call. "At your service." She says.

"Pull up the 04 victims." Agent Hotchner tells Penelope.

"Done." She says and I do the same thing. I knew that I need to do hands on to learn this stuff.

"All right, we need a list of their children." He tells her and I do the same thing.

"Okay, next of kin, state welfare, give me a sec." She starts typing on her computer as I do the same. "Gotcha! Okay! Some were put into foster care after moms died."

"Runaways and a lot had truancies. Ouch. These kids were troubled." I say and frown. "I feel so bad for them."

"Any incarcerated?" Hotchner asks.

"A handful." She says.

"Can you give us other parameters?" I ask.

"Not yet. Just send the list." He says.

"Comin' at ya now." She says and sends it over. She smiles over at me. "Trying to learn how to take over my job?"

"Of course." I say and laugh.

"Let's go grab our lunch. They won't need us for a while." She says.

"I'm going to stay here. I want to try and get your stuff down. Mind if I use your computer to do a little digging?" I ask.

"Sure. Want me to pick you up something?" She asks.

"Please and thank you." I tell her and go and sit in her chair. I hear her leave the room and I turn to her computer and just sniff. I have always loved the smell of computers and books. I knew how they worked and knew how to fix most problems. I open my eyes and get to work. I start looking up the kids of the victims and try to find anything important about them. I hear the phone ring and frown. I look to the door and wait a second to see if Penelope will come back in time, but I knew she wasn't. I answer the phone. "Um.. hello?"

"Miss England?" I hear Hotchner ask.

"Yes sir. Penelope, um Agent Garcia went to get lunch. We didn't think you would call so soon." I explain.

"Okay, well can you look some stuff for us?" He asks.

"Of course. I have been looking into the children of the victims." I tell him.

"Okay did any of the kids have a cochlear implant?" I hear a young man's voice ask. I was guessing that it was Dr. Reid, the tall lanky man I semi-meet this morning.

"Um…" I up the info into the system. "Yes. John Myers, 1988. He was 14." I look more into the kid and find an article on the testing. "Oh damn. His mom was paid 650 dollars to get it in."

"Was he deaf before that?" Morgan asked.

"He had to be in order to participate." I look more into the procedure. "Yikes. It was very experimental. It was only tested on humans, never on animals. Yay animals, I guess. It caused controversy all over."

"Thanks." Hotchner says and then hangs up.

I sigh and shake my head. "Poor kid."

The door opens and I look over. Penelope looks at me and frowns. "Did they call back?"

"Yeah. I think I did well. Um this kid, John Myers had this implant and his mom was paid for it to be put in. The procedure was very dangerous and not many good reviews." I explain to her.

She frowns and hands me a to-go box. "Yikes."

"That's what I say." I tell her and open the box. It was Chinese food. "Oh good." I smile and start eating.

After we eat, we dig into John Myers' life and his life in jail. "Oh here we got something. Mr. Myers was always in solitary. He has been in there 480 times. I wonder if his ear implant was hurting him." I tell Penelope.

"I'll put the team on speaker." She says and presses a button.

"Rossi." I hear the older Italian man say.

"So we, and by we, I mean Gwen, found out that Myers has been in solitary more than any other inmate." Penelope tells Agent Rossi.

"Okay girls, just hold on." He tells us. I hear him going into a room with other voices and then those voices got louder. "Go ahead girls."

"Okay our unsub was the MVP of solitary." Penelope tells the team. "He was in there more than any other prisoner."

"He was in there 480 times." I say as I slide over to the speaker.

"All right, we're looking for somebody who didn't belong in jail. His offense would be minimal." I hear Agent Hotchner tell us. Penelope starts bringing down the search. "He might even be there for his own protection."

"Un-huh." Penelope says. The search was down to five men now. "I got a few."

"Can you read off the hometowns?" Agent Blake asks.

"Sure." She says. She looks at me and smiles.

"Um. Beaumont, Edinburg, Sweetwater." I start reading off.

"Sweetwater. Who was that inmate?" Agent Blake asks.

"Uh Danny Tucker." Penelope tells her.

"He was only in for two months." I tell them.

"Well, it's long enough to tell stories to John Myers." I hear Agent Hotchner say.

"Hey, his family owns property near where you are." Penelope says as she digs deeper into the inmate. "It's really secluded too."

"With local honey, by any chance?" Agent Blake asks.

"They are known for it." I tell them as a page for the honey pops up on the screen.

"That's where he's headed." Agent Hotchner says. "Garcia, is it a private property?"

"It was, but it's been sold." She tells him as she digs deeper. "They're building a housing development."

"So it's not the hideaway he hopes it's going to be." Agent Hotchner says, thinking out loud.

"Where would he go?" Dr. Reid asks.

"He might blame Danny for lying to him." Hotchner explains. "Garcia."

"Danny's house is down the road from the development." Penelope says and I get out my phone and send the address to the team's phones. "Gwen is sending the address to your phones right now."

Penelope hangs up and we start looking into this Danny guy. "He would have never seen this dude."

She presses her button. "You're on speaker, Garcia." I hear Hotchner say. I could hear a car driving and sirens. They were going to the spot right now and I was getting worried.

"Hey, we were doing some digging 'cause that's what we do, and I found something weird. Danny Tucker was only ever in solitary." Penelope explains.

"So they never saw one another." Blake figures out.

"I can't tell you that for sure, but." Penelope says, getting fustraded.

"Well, we know Danny wasn't made for jail time." A younger woman's voice says. "He probably talked just to keep his sanity. Sold the story of paradise to some guy stuck in darkness." I was guessing that it was Agent Jareau.

"Gave him all that time to fantasize about the place, he finally gets free and he's convinced that finding it will solve everything." Morgan says.

"And every one is okay?" I hear Penelope ask someone on the phone as I walk back into the lair. I had gone for coffee for the both of us.

"Yes baby girl." I hear Morgan tell her. "We are getting on the plane now and we will be home soon. I'll text you when we land."

"Thank you. See you soon." He says and hangs up.

She turns around and accepts the coffee I handed her. "So they are all safe?" I ask.

"Yes. They won't be back for a while. You can go home." She tells me.

"No, I'll wait with them with you. You can explain the team more to me." I say and sit down.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
For the next couple hours, we talk and get to know each other more. She explains about the team and I explain how I was orphaned as a child and don't know my real parents. I told her about how I've never had a real family and she tells me that I have a family now. From her description, I could tell that I could be very good friends with Dr. Reid. He was very geeky like I was. Penelope jumps up as her phone lights up.

"Chocolate thunder?" She asks. I look at her weird and she just shakes it off. "Great. I'll be there in a minute." She hangs up her phone and grabs her stuff. "Okay the team is back. Do you want to come with me to meet the team?"

I think about it. "No. I want to officially meet the team when they aren't all tired. I'll see you tomorrow."

She nods and smiles. "Okay have a good night. Sleep well." She tells me and leaves.

I get my stuff and look around the room. "I think I will like it here." I say to myself and go to the elevator. As the doors open, four of the people from this morning come out. Agent Rossi, Agent Morgan, Agent Jareau and Dr. Reid come out. "Oh hello." I say softly.

They stop and look at me. "Who are you?" Agent Rossi asks.

"Oh you're Penelope's intern, aren't you?" Morgan asks. "We kind of meet you this morning."

I nod. "Yes. We didn't really get to be formally meet because of the case." I say and smile.

"Okay well I will formally meet you tomorrow." Agent Rossi says and walks into the offices.

"He is always like that, but I agree. I will see you tomorrow." Morgan says and waves to me.

"Nice seeing you." Jareau says and follows the two men.

I nod and press the button for the elevator again. "I like your bow." I hear Dr. Reid say softly. I look over and smile. I raise a hand to touch the Doctor Who TARDIS bow I put in my hair this morning. "Who is your favorite Doctor?"

"Nine. He was my first and he will always be my favorite." I say softly and look down. I could talk about my shows and rambles, so I'm trying to stop being such a geek, which can freak people out.

"Classic who is so much better. Four is the best Doctor out there." He says, like I offended him. I look up and see that he is smiling softly at me. "I'm Spencer Reid." He holds out his hand.

I look at it. "Did you know it is cleaner to kiss someone than to shake their hand." I tell him and look up.

He grins and takes his hand back. "I did know that but not a lot of people do." We get into the elevator when the doors open.

"I remember random facts and just spill them out when the time is right, or I'm nervous, which both of those times are now so yeah." I say and look down.

"What is your name?" He asks.

"Gwendolyn England. I'm the new intern for Penelope." I tell him and smile.

"Well welcome to the team. I hope you have a fun time here." He says as we get out of the elevator. "Have a nice night." He says as he walks off.

"Night." I call after him.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
So this is a very unpolished story right now. I stayed up writing this and I will come back and go over it. If someone wants to be a Beta, message me please.

Please read and review


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter.   
> I don't own Criminal Mind cus if I did then Spencer Reid would always be on the screen.

I wake up the next day and sit up. I get up and take a shower and look my clothes. I was tired of wearing greys and blacks. I pick up my phone and call Penelope.   
“Hello my sweet. What are you needing?” Penelope says as she picks up her phone.   
“Do I have to have to wear black and greys. They make me feel sad.” I tell her.   
“I never do. Wear something fun.” She says and I could hear the smile in her voice. “We are so much alike.”   
I laugh. “If you say so Penelope.” I say and look at my clothes. “Okay, I know what I’m going to wear, so I’ll see you soon at the office.”   
“Okay. See you soon.” She tells me and hangs up.   
I grab a blue skirt that flowed around my knees, a dark blue and white sweater that was an open neck. I paired it with a pair of dark blue heels that were open toed and an open back. I put on some dark blue bangles on my wrist, a dark blue ring, and a dark blue choker. I look in the mirror and smile. My long red hair went very well with my outfit. I knew that Penelope would like my outfit choice. I grad a small dark blue clutch and head to work.   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
When I get into the office, I see the whole team sitting and talking. Penelope looks over as I enter. “Sweet, your outfit is amazing!” She says and grins.   
Everyone turns their heads towards me and I get very red. “Um.. thanks Penelope. I just wanted to dress how I normally do.” I say softly as I get to the team.   
“Very nice sweet stuff.” Morgan says and grins at me.   
“Ta.” I say and look around. “Good morning guys. Is there coffee up?”   
“Yeah, I was just heading over there, do you want to join me?” Spencer asks me.   
“Sure.” I say and walk over to the break room and get two mugs. “How do you like your coffee?”   
“I can make my own.” He says and takes the mug from in front of me. He pours coffee into the mug and starts adding sugar into his coffee.   
I watch as he keeps adding the sugar. “Do you want some coffee with your sugar?” I say with a smile.   
He stops and looks at me and blushes. “I like sugar.” He says softly. I laugh and pour coffee into my mug and takes a drink. “How can you drink it black?” He says with a gross look on his face.   
I smile. “I like coffee.”   
He laughs and we walk out to the team. I can see Penelope watching us as we walk back.   
“Well you should be formally meet the team. I’m Derek Morgan.” Morgan tells me and holds out his hand.   
“She doesn’t shake hands.” Spencer tells Morgan before I could say anything.   
“So she is another Reid.” Rossi says and sighs.   
“Another Reid?” I ask him.   
“I don’t like shaking hands either. I don’t like the germs.” Spencer explains.   
“But you offered me your hand yesterday.” I look at Spencer and frown.   
Spencer looks down and blushes. “I was trying to be nice and not scare you off right away. I tend to be the weird one.” He explains.   
“You aren’t weird Spence. You are just you.” Jennifer tells Spencer and places a hand on his arm. He looks at her and smiles. She looks at me and smiles. “Well I’m Jennifer, but you call me JJ.”   
“I’m Alex Blake.” Blake tells me as I look at her.   
“I’m David Rossi.” Rossi says and smiles. He looks around at the group. “I’m going to have a barbeque tomorrow night to celebrate Blake and England joining the team. Bring your other families.” He tells us.   
“Will you have some fake meat for me this time?” Penelope asks him.   
Rossi sighs but nods. “Yes. I will get your gross fake meat.”   
“I’m a vegetarian.” Penelope explains to me. I nod as Hotchner comes up to the team.   
“Welcome to the team England. I hope you learn a lot from Penelope. You could be a great asset to the team.” Hotchner tells me.   
I nod and smile. “Thank you Agent Hotchner.”   
“Call me Hotch. Everyone else does and they will get you to do it soon.” He says and looks at everyone. “Today is a paperwork day. Relax and get as much done as you can.”   
Penelope looks at me. “Well, Gwen, I get the privilege of teaching you how to do paperwork. Let’s go to the round table and I can spread out.” She tells me. I nod and we tell the team goodbye.   
~~~~~~  
Through the day, the team catches up on paper work and not doing much. It was a slow day and I was glad for it. Penelope took me on a tour of the building and got me up to date on how things worked around the office. We meet the team in the office at the end of the day. “We are heading out for drinks, do you want to join us girls?” Morgan asks when we get to the team.   
“Yes. Friday night drinks.” Penelope says and smiles. “How about you Gwen?”   
“Um. No. I should get home.” I say and look away. I didn’t feel like I should break into their time as a family.   
“Gwen. Please join us. We want to get to know you better.” JJ tells me. “Blake is joining us so you won’t be the only new comer there.”   
I look at the team see them all looking at me. “Okay.” I say and smile softly.   
“Yes.” Morgan says and smiles. “Let’s head out.”   
We all went out to the garage. “Can I get a ride Morgan?” I hear Spencer ask.   
“I was going to get a ride with Penelope. I didn’t bring my car today.” Morgan explains to Spencer.   
“I can, um, bring you.” I speak up. I could feel Penelope’s eyes on me. I knew she liked matching people up and getting them together. I didn’t want to be her next subject.   
“Oh. Okay, yeah. That would be good.” Spencer says and smiles. “See you guys soon.” He tells the team and starts following me to my car. “Thank you Gwendolyn.”   
“Call me Gwen, Dr. Reid. It is easier to say. My name is a mouthful.” I say as we get into my car.   
“Then call me Spencer. No need for such formalities.” He says and smiles.   
“Okay Spencer.” I say and start the car. I liked how his name sounded on my tongue. It just rolled off my tongue and make me feel happy. I knew I could fall for people very fast so I knew I would have to keep myself in check because I couldn’t mess this opportunity up.   
We get to the bar, with Spencer giving me direction and I park my car. “So who will be joining us?”   
“Probably the team, minus Hotch and Blake. He has a son at home and he is a single dad, so he likes to stay home with Jack as much as possible. And Blake doesn’t come out all the time” Spencer explains as we get out.   
“Oh being a single parent must be hard.” I say and lock my car.   
“Well his wife was killed by a murder but I will let Hotch explain what happened when he feels ready to tell you. It’s not my story.” He says and smiles softly at me.   
“I understand that. We all have pasts that we don’t share right away.” I say, thinking about the family or lack of.   
“Yes we do.” He says and we make our way into the bar. We grabbed a table and waited for the team. “So do you have siblings?” Spencer asks after a minute of silence.   
I look at him and shake my head. “No. I, um, actually I was, am, an orphan. My parents left me on the steps of the local church and just left.” I look down and play with my hands.   
“Oh. I’m sorry.” He says softly. “My dad left my mom and me when I was ten. I lived with my mom until I was eighteen. My mom is a schizophrenic. I put her into an institution.” He says and looks away.   
“I’m sorry you had to do that Spencer.” I say softly and lay a hand on his lower arm. He smiles softly at me and nods.   
“Hello my pretties!” Penelope says loudly as she comes to the table, followed by everyone else. I take my hand away and look at them all. JJ had a man by her side.   
“Hello guys.” JJ says to us and smiles. They all sit down, with Penelope next to me. “Gwen, this is my husband Will.” JJ says to me. I smile at the man. “Will, this is Penelope’s intern Gwen.”   
“Nice to meet you.” Will says in a southern accent.   
“You too.” I say as the waitress comes to the table. Everyone orders an alcoholic drink except for Spencer and myself. Spencer and I order waters and then the waitress leaves.   
“No drinking?” Morgan asks me.   
“I don’t drink.” I say and smile softly.   
“Oh come on. Everyone drinks something.” Morgan says. “What is your poison? I think you look like a cosmo girl.”   
“I think scotch.” Rossi says and smiles at me.   
“No she is a wine girl.” JJ says.   
“I really don’t drink anything.” I say and look down.   
“Okay sweetie. If you say so.” Morgan says.   
~~~~~  
After a couple of hours, the whole team was tipsy, except for myself, Spencer, and Rossi.   
“So Reid was found all wet from being in the pool. He said that he fell in, but I think there is more than that. What really happened with Lila?” Morgan asks Spencer.   
Spencer’s face was bright red and he was playing with his hands. “Nothing you need to know Morgan.” We all laugh, JJ and Penelope laughing too much. “You guys are drunk.”   
“No Way!” Penelope says and laugh. “I’m suod.”   
“Suod?” I ask giggling.   
“Well I was going to say super and then thought good. Suod.” She explains.   
“Okay baby girl. You should stop.” Morgan says.   
“You are drunk too Morgan.” I tell him.   
“No, you’re drunk.” He tells me.   
“Okay, sure. I’m drunk.” I say and roll my eyes.   
“Oh they have karaoke!” JJ says and stands up. “Let’s go do it. We can have fun!” She pulls on Penelope’s hand to have her stand up. Penelope gets up and grabs Morgan’s hand and the three of them go to the karaoke stand.  
“How fun will this be?” I ask the three boys who were still sitting.   
“Oh it will be a lot of fun. I’m going to video tape it because I don’t get many chances to have leverage over my wife.” Will says as he gets up and goes to the karaoke area.   
“I’m going to get more drinks for the team. You guys want something?” Rossi asks Spencer and me.   
“A root beer please.” I say and smile softly.   
“Reid?” Rossi looks at Spencer.   
“No, I’m good. Thanks.” Spencer says and takes a small drink of his water.   
“Okay, I’ll be back.” Rossi says and goes to the bar.   
I turn and look at Spencer. “So Lila?” I say and smirk.   
“Oh not you too.” He says and frowns.   
I laugh and shake my head. “I’m messing with you. It is cute how Morgan teases you. It’s like he is your brother or something.”   
“Well the team is like a family. I guess that would make Hotch as our father, Blake as our mom and then Rossi is our uncle. Weird.” Spencer says slowly and frowns.   
I laugh and nod. “Yes weird.” I look at the team who were singing loudly and off key. “Do they do this often?”   
“What sing badly? No.” Spencer says.   
“No, go out for drinks and fun.” I clarify.   
“Oh, yeah. Sometimes. Especially after a bad case.” He explains. “I mean we all have our own lives too, but this job gets us all close and personal. But we respected each other’s privacy too. Sometimes.”   
“Sometimes?” I ask.   
“Well sometimes, we get into each other’s lives but for the better.” He explains.   
“Okay.” I say and nod. I just sat and watched the girls and Morgan singing something that sounded like something from the seventies.   
“Okay so a root beer for the lady and another water for the gent.” Rossi says as he walks over with a tray of drinks.   
“Oh thank you Rossi.” Spencer says and takes the water. He was almost done with his water. I grabbed my root beer and started to sip on it. “So what are your plans for the weekend?”   
“I was planning to get out of town.” Rossi says and drinks his scotch. “Gwen?”   
“There is a Doctor Who marathon on BBC America so I was planning on staying in and watching that.” I say softly. I was kind of embarrassed that my plan was very geeky.   
“No way. I was going to do that too.” Spencer said and smiles at me.   
I look at him and smile. “Well do you want to come over and watch it together? We can order pizza and stuff like that. I haven’t unpacked a lot of stuff but I have a huge TV.”   
He looks surprised. “Oh yeah. Sure.” He says softly. I had a feeling that Spencer didn’t get invited to many things. I grin and nod.   
“I’ll text you my number later.” I tell him as the others come over. Will was helping JJ walk over and Morgan and Penelope had their arms around each other and giggling. “Did you guys have fun?”   
“So much fun! You should have joined us!” Penelope says and giggles. “More drinks!” She grabs her cosmo and starts drinking it. The others take their drinks.   
“What were you guys talking about?” Morgan asks.   
“Our plans for the weekend.” Rossi says and smiles at Spencer and myself. “England and Reid have made plans.”   
“What?! I knew you two would get along! Your first date!” Penelope gushes over us.   
“What? It’s not...” I say softly and look at Reid, feeling my face going red.   
“It’s not a date Pen.” Spencer says and looks down, blushing.   
“What? No. You guys..” Penelope says softly.  
I get up and grab my clutch. “I’m going to head home. Which drunkies should I bring home? Morgan, Penelope, JJ, and Rossi, you guys shouldn’t drive.” I tell them.   
“Well I have JJ. I can take Rossi home too. Your house is on our way.” Will says.   
“Okay. I’ll take a ride.” Rossi says and stands up. “See you guys on Monday.”   
“Bye guys.” I tell JJ, Will, and Rossi as they walk out. I turn to the others. “Who am I taking?”   
“Well I brought Morgan. So us.” Penelope says and giggles.   
“And you brought me, so I guess I’m coming with.” Spencer says and stands up.   
“Okay, sounds like a plan.” I start walking out of the bar, getting my keys out.   
“So what does the short stack drive? A bug? A block car?” Morgan asks as we walk out.   
“Nope and nope.” I say as I unlock a silver minivan.   
“No way. You drive a minivan? What are you, a soccer mom?” Morgan asks as he laughs.   
I turn and look at him. “Okay one. Maybe I am soccer mom. Have you ever thought of that? Two. If you don’t like it, then walk home.”   
I turn back around and get into my car. I was very sensitive about my car. I get a lot of grief about car and I get angry when someone makes fun of my baby. I take a deep breath and could see Spencer and Morgan talking. I close my eyes and lean my head back. I hear the door open and feel someone getting in. “He didn’t mean anything sweetie.” I hear Penelope tell me.   
I sigh and nod. “I know. I get a lot of crap for my type of car. I just get fed up with it so I snap on people who make any remark about my car. I’ll tell him I’m sorry when he gets in.” I tell her and turn and look at her. “I don’t blow up on people normally. I’m sorry Penelope.”   
She smiles at me and nod. “I understand girly.”   
Spencer gets into the front seat and smiles at me. Morgan gets into the back seat next to Penelope. “I’m sorry Morgan. I really am. Too many people have made fun of me for having a minivan, but that doesn’t mean I should have blown up at you. I’m sorry Morgan.” I say as I turn around to him. I smile softly. “I am sorry.”   
“It’s all forgiven short stack.” Morgan says and smiles at me. “I can understand where you are coming from.” He says and places a hand on my shoulder. “All is forgiven.”   
“Okay good. Let’s get you home. Addresses people.” I tell them. I get the address from the three and think. “Okay, I will drop off Morgan, then Penny, and then Spencer.”   
“Sounds good.” Morgan says and closes his eyes. “I am going to have a hangover tomorrow.”   
I laugh as I pull out of the parking lot. “I think you both will have nasty hangovers in the morning.” I look over at Spencer. “Thank god we didn’t drink Spencer. We will be ready for our Doctor Who marathon.” I pull out onto the street.   
“So short stack and pretty boy have a date tomorrow?” Morgan says and chuckles.   
“Not a date Morgan. Just two co-workers watching a show.” Spencer says.   
I frown at Spencer’s words. “Just co-workers?” Penelope asks. “Gweni is part of our family. She is not a co-worker. She is at least friends.” I could hear Penelope’s frown as she was talking.   
“Penny, it’s fine.” I say and keep my eyes on the road. I drop off Morgan and then Penelope. “We will be at your house soon.” I tell Spencer softly.   
“Gwen. I didn’t say the right thing. I didn’t mean to say co-worker. I was just getting flustered from Morgan’s taunts and I just spoke without thinking. I don’t of you as a co-worker. Penelope was right, you are part of the family. You are my friend.” Spencer says to me.   
“It’s fine. You were just telling the truth. I am just a co-worker. I’m the new girl still.” I say and smile softly at him. We get to his house and I pull to the curb and park the car. “I can understand that I’m not accepted into the BAU family yet and that it will take some time. So I will see you tomorrow right, co-worker?”   
“Gwen. Please. I didn’t mean that. I swear you are part of the family. You are our friends. You are my friend.” He says softly and looks at me. “Please forgive me, Gwen, please.”   
I sigh and nod. “Okay Spencer. I forgive you.” I say and smile at him. “I understand that sometimes you say the wrong thing. I’ll see you tomorrow Spencer.”   
Spencer opens the door and nods. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Text me your address.”   
“I will. Night.” I say as he closes the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read and review.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. I’m going to change when Spencer and Gwen have their Doctor Who marathon to Sunday because I forgot I forgot I said that Rossi would have barbeque. So this chapter will be the barbeque and the next chapter will be the Doctor Who marathon.   
> I don’t own Criminal Minds.

I woke up and looked at the clock. It was nine o’clock and I smile. I hadn’t slept this long in a while. I sat up and grabbed my phone. I grin and call Penelope.   
“Who disturbs my sleep?” I hear Penelope say grouchy.   
“Oh hello lovely girl. How did you sleep?” I ask and grin.   
“Why do you hate me?” She wines. “I need sleep. I don’t feel good.”   
“Why don’t I come over and help you with your hangover. I’ll text Rossi, Morgan, and Spencer to see if they want to join.” I offer to her.   
“Oh yes, my pretty. Have them come over here. I’ll text JJ, Hotch, and Blake to see if they want to come too.” Penelope says, and I could hear the smile on her face.   
“Okay. I’ll text you when I’m on my way.” I tell her and hang up. I text Rossi and Morgan to ask if they want to come and need a ride. I call Spencer.   
“Hello?” Spencer says, sleep still in his voice.   
“Hey Spencer. It’s Gwen. I was wondering if you wanted to join the team at Penelope’s house for the breakfast. I can pick you up if you want.” I tell him.   
“Oh yeah sure. Yes, on the ride too.” He tells me. “How long do I have?”   
“Um like ten minutes.” I tell him, getting up.   
“Sounds like a plan. See you then.” He says and hangs up.   
I get up and get changed into jeans, a sweater, and boots. I love fall weather. I see that Morgan and Rossi said they would join us. I get my coat and car keys and go to my car, turning on my Broadway turns as I get in. I drive to Spencer’s building and text him that I was there. He gets in the passenger seat and smiles at me.   
“Hello Gwen.” He says and buckles up. “How did you sleep?”   
“I slept like a baby. I don’t think some of our co-workers will be saying the same thing. Penny almost bit my head off this morning when I called.” I say and smile. “We are going to pick up Rossi and Morgan too.”   
“Sounds good. Who is all coming?” Spencer asks as we get on the street, driving to Morgan’s.   
“Um, possibly the whole team. Penny is contacting Blake and Hotch.” I tell him. “So I could be meeting the whole family today instead of tonight.” I smile softly.   
“It’s really just Jack, Hotch’s son, Beth, Hotch’s girlfriend, and Henry, JJ’s son, that you will be meeting. Not like another group of us.” Spencer explains as I pull up to Morgan’s apartment. “I’ll text him.”   
“Sounds good.” I say and lean my head back, listening to the music.   
“What the hell are you listening to?” Morgan asks as he gets in. I look in my mirror to see him with sunglasses on and a hoodie over his head.   
“Oh is someone light sensitive?” I ask, laughing softly.   
“Oh be quite and turn down the music.” He says and rubs his forehead.   
“Spencer, did he just say turn the music up?” I look at Spencer and ask.   
“I think he did Gwen.” Spencer says with a smirk on his face.   
“Oh good. I like this song.” I say, turn up the music, and laugh.   
“England!” Morgan yells and covers his ears.   
I laugh as I turn down the music. “Sorry. Sorry. I’m sorry Morgan.” I say as I head back onto the street. “We are picking up Rossi and then going to Penny’s”   
“You already have a nickname for her? I swear that you and my sweet are too much alike already.” Morgan says and laughs, then instantly groans. “I’m going to shut my eyes, just tell me when we get there.”   
“Will do.” Spencer says and smiles at me.   
“I told you.” I say softly, reminding him of when I told him that everyone would be in a bad handover. He just smiles at me and chuckles.   
We get to Rossi’s and I text him. He gets in after a minute of waiting and smiles at Morgan. “How are you this morning, Morgan?” Morgan just groans and turns his head towards the window. “I don’t think Morgan heard me.” Rossi says to Spencer and myself.   
“No I don’t think he did.” I say, looking in the rearview mirror at Morgan. “We should talk louder right?”   
“I think we should.” Rossi says louder.   
“Guys…” Morgan says softly and groans again. “Please…”   
“Okay, okay, Morgan we’ll stop. We have ten minutes till we get to Penny’s and we will keep quite.” I say softly and smile at Morgan in the mirror. “Spencer, can you text Penny and tell her we are on our way.”   
“Sure.” He says and gets his phone out.  
We get to Penny’s apartment and knock on her door. I hear a soft groan and a soft “Coming.” Penny opens the door in sweatpants and a union jack hoodie. “Hi guys.” She says softly and moves to the side to let us in.   
We all enter and see the rest of the team had already arrived. “Hello guys.” I say and sit down on the love seat. JJ had sunglasses on and was leaning against her husband’s shoulder. She raised her hand and smile.   
A young boy with blond hair ran up to Spencer. “Uncle Spencer!”   
“Henry!” Spencer says and picks him up. “How are you buddy?”   
“Good. Mommy is sick.” He says and Spencer and I laugh.   
“She sure is. So is Aunt Penelope and Morgan.” Spencer tells him and sits down next to me. “Henry, this is our newest member of our family. Her name is Gwen. Can you say hi?”   
“Hi Gwen.” Henry says softly and smiles.   
“Hi Henry. I like your Spiderman shirt.” I tell him and smile back.   
He giggles and puts his head in Spencer’s shoulder. “Oh someone is shy.” Spencer says and smiles at me.   
“Who is cooking?” Penny asks us all as she sits down and covers her eyes.   
“Well I could probably do something in your kitchen. Do you have any bacon?” Rossi ask.   
She looks at him and frowns. “I am a vegetarian, so no.”   
“Well we need meat.” Rossi says.   
“Why don’t Gwen and I go to the store? Rossi write a list of what you need and we can go get it.” Spencer suggests.   
“Yes. Let’s do that.” Morgan says as he leans his head back and closes his eyes.   
“And while you are doing that, Rossi, Will, and I can take the boys and go to the park across the street.” Hotch suggests.   
“I’ll stay with the others.” Blake says.   
“Can I go with Uncle Spencer?” Henry asks his mom and dad softly.   
“If it’s okay with Spencer and Gwen, I’m fine with it.” Will says and looks at Hotch. “Then I can stay here with Blake to help with the sick people and help them.”   
“Okay sounds good. Gwen, do you want to come with me to the kitchen so we can figure out what we need?” Rossi asks me.   
“Sure, sounds like a plan.” I say and get up.   
“I’ll get Henry ready to go.” Spencer says and stands up with Henry on his hip.   
I look at him and smile. The way Spencer handled Henry, I could tell that he would be a great father. I shake my head softly and follow Rossi into the kitchen. Rossi and I figured out that we only needed a couple items for homemade pancakes and bacon. “Ready to go Spencer?”   
He nods and takes Henry’s hand. “JJ can you unlock your car so we can get his seat out?”   
“Sure Spence.” She says softly and gets up. “I’ll unlock it when I see you out there.”   
“Sounds good.” Spencer says and we head out.   
“Spence?” I ask him in the elevator.   
“Oh, that’s what JJ calls me. She was the first person to make me feel really accepted into the group so we have been best friends forever.” Spencer explains.   
“Did you have a crush on her when you first started?” I ask and laugh.   
“Well since I was a twenty-two at the time and not many girls had talked to me a lot, yes I did. We kind of went on a date to a football game but we decided that we are better friends than anything.” Spencer explains.   
I look at him. “I didn’t see you as a football fan.”   
“Oh I’m not. JJ had to explain everything to me as the game went on, but Gideon got them for me on my twenty-third birthday for the sole reason to take JJ out on a date.” He explains.   
“Who is Gideon?” I ask.   
“Oh he was a member of the team six years ago. He left but then we got Rossi.” Spencer says and frowns.   
“Were you close with Gideon?” I ask him softly.   
The elevator doors open and we exit the building. “Yeah, I was.” He says softly.   
“I’m sorry Spencer.” I say. He nods and looks up at the building. He waves to signal to JJ and I hear a car unlock. “It’s unlocked.” I go over and get the car seat out of the car and put it in my car. “Okay, we are ready.” I tell him. “Do you know how to put him in or do you want me to put him in.”   
“I know how to put him in.” He says and puts Henry into the car seat. I get in the car and start it. Spencer gets in and I look at him. “Where is the closest store?”   
“I think there is one right down the road.” He says.   
“Sounds good.” I drive down the road and find the store. We hurry up and get the groceries. “So Henry, who is your favorite superhero?” I ask him.   
“Spiderman!” He yells and giggles.   
“He is super cool. I like Harley Quinn.” I tell him.   
“She isn’t a superhero Gweni.” Henry says and laughs.   
We get back in the car and start driving back. “I know but I love her.” I look at Spencer. “What about you?”   
“Um, I don’t think I have a favorite, but I like Spiderman.” Spencer says and smiles.   
“We need to fix that, right Henry?” I ask the young boy. I see him nod in mirror. I stop at a red light and look at Spencer. “You will have a favorite.”   
“Yes, Uncle Spencer!” Henry says and we all laugh.   
I look at the street and smile. I was enjoying myself so much with the team. I was finally understanding what a family really looked like. The light turned to green and I was about to go when a car slams into the back of my car.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter just became this long chapter. I don't understand how it got this long but it is. 
> 
> Please review :) 
> 
> I don't own Criminal Minds

I open my eyes slowly and hear someone calling my name. “Gwen? Gwendolyn? Can you hear me?” I hear someone say. I try to focus on the voice and I look over and see Spencer looking at me. “Gwen? Oh thank God.” He looks over his shoulder. “She is awake guys!” He yells so someone. He looks at me and smiles. “Hey Gwen. You are going to be okay.”   
“What happened?” I ask softly.   
He frowns. “You don’t remember?” He asks. I shake my head slowly and close my eyes as a headache enters my head. “Try to keep still.” He says and sits down. “Gwen, someone hit the back of the car. They couldn’t stop in time and rammed into the car.” Spencer explains to me.   
“What?! Are you hurt? Is Henry hurt?” I ask, worried.   
He smiles softly. “Yes, we are fine. You are the only one hurt.” He tells me.   
“I’m not hurt.” I tell him. “Just a headache.”   
“You hit your head on the steering wheel Gwen. You got a cut and bruises. I think you might have a concussion.” He tells me.   
“I’m fine.” I say and start getting out of the car.   
Hotch appears at the window and closes the door I just opened. “Gwendolyn. You cannot get out of the car. You need to wait to for the ambulance.”   
“I’m fine Hotch. I swear.” I say and frown. I wasn’t hurting. Spencer said I had a cut but I didn’t feel any blood. “I…” The headache got even worse and I had to close my eyes.   
“Do you have a headache?” I hear Spencer ask. I nod slowly. “Okay, you need to stay sitting. The ambulance will be here shortly.”   
I sigh and nod, knowing that I am trying to win a losing battle. I open my eyes and look at Spencer. “Henry is really okay? He was in the back seat and would have been hit harder than we were.”   
“Henry is fine. The car seat did its job and kept him safe and sound. Do you want me to go grab him?” He asks.   
“Yes, please.” I say softly. I was worried that Henry was hurt and that JJ was super mad at me. She trusted me with her child and I got him hurt in an accident. I see Henry crawl into the passenger seat and smile at me. “Henry. You are okay!”   
“I am Gweni.” He says and frowns. “Your head is bleeding. Why is it bleeding?”   
I frown and touch my head and wince. I bring my hand down and see blood on my fingers. Not just any blood, my blood. “Oh wow.” I say and pass out.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRRSRSR  
-Spencer’s POV-   
Gwen passed out and I moved Henry. “Gwen?” I say and try to find a pulse.   
“Spencer, she will be fine. She just passed out.” Hotch says as he opens the driver door. He unbuckles Gwen and picks her up bridal style. I get out and follow him. The ambulance had arrived and I was planning on going in the ambulance with Gwen. Hotch sets Gwen on the backboard and the medics start putting her into the back. I start to get into the ambulance but Hotch stops me. “I’m going with Gwen to the hospital. I saw the accident happen, you didn’t.” He told me and got into the ambulance. The medics closed the doors and the ambulance drives off.   
I don’t know how long I was standing there, but the next thing I feel is a hand on my arm. I turn and see it was JJ. She frowns. “She will be okay. She only passed out because of the blood and probably shock.” She tells me.   
“I know.” I look at the fading ambulance. “I know she just joined the group a couple days ago, but she is already important to me.” I tell her and look over at JJ. “Is that weird?”   
“No. I feel the same way. She is part of the family and we are all really worried. Let’s all go to the hospital.” JJ says and leads me to the group.   
“She was really worried that Henry got hurt. She wouldn’t believe me till she saw that he wasn’t hurt.” I explain to her.   
She smiles and looks at Henry. “She is a very compassionate person.”   
“Pretty boy, you okay?” Morgan asks as we get to the group.   
“Yeah. Let’s just go make sure Gwen is.” I say.   
We all pile into the cars and go to the hospital. I don’t understand why I was so worried. I know that she will be okay. I was just worried that she would never open her beautiful blue eyes again. I frown at my thoughts. I shouldn’t be thinking of Gwen in that way. I had Maeve. I didn’t want to ruin anything that we had. Maeve is my special person and Gwen was just a new friend. She wasn’t someone to get feelings for. I shake my head and close my eyes. When that car slammed into us, it was horrible. I didn’t get hurt but when I opened my eyes after the car stopped moving and saw Gwen just sitting there with blood running down her face. It was one of the worst things I could think of. Gwen seems so strong and seeing her like that was wrong.   
We get to the hospital and go in. Hotch is waiting for us when we get inside. “She is getting checked out. They said that she didn’t need surgery or anything. She has a slight concussion and will have to miss work on Monday, but nothing major. She probably just is faint in the sight of blood. The doctor said that he will come out when we can go in.” Hotch explains to us.   
We all go to the waiting room and the others sit down. I knew I wouldn’t be able to stay still until I saw her. I start to pace and close my eyes. “Spence, she will be okay.” Morgan says.   
“What if she isn’t!?” I yell and stop. “Sorry. I’m getting over emotional and I don’t understand why.” I look at Penelope and see her crying. “Penelope, what’s wrong?”   
“What if she isn’t alright? I really like her. She is part of this family and I can’t have her leave us already. I…” She says and Morgan wraps his arms around her.   
I sigh and sit down. I think of Maeve and frown. I really liked Maeve. She is the only one who truly understands me. I see Henry get up and come over to me. “Hey small fry.”   
“Hey Uncle Spencer. Is Gweni going to be okay?” He asks softly.   
“She is going to be okay. I’m sorry I yelled. I just over reacted. I promise you she will be okay.” I tell him and smile. He smiles and leans his head on me.   
After waiting for what felt like a lifetime, the doctor came out and asked, “Gwendolyn England’s family.”   
“We are with her.” Hotch tells him and he comes over.   
“She is going to be okay. She has a concussion but she will be able to leave when she wakes up. I just need someone to look after her today.” The doctor tells us.   
“We are spending the day together, so that won’t be a problem. Can we go back?” Hotch asks.   
“Yes. She is in room 198, right down the hall.” The doctor tells. Once he tells us what room, I get up with Henry in my arms and run to her room.   
I open the door and see Gwen lying in the bed. She looked so weird in the bed. She should be up and doing something. The rest of the team comes in and I sit in the seat next to her bed. I sigh and sit back. Henry curls up on my lap and closes his eyes. I look at the team and they smile. “She is okay.” I say and smile.   
“She is.” Morgan says and looks at her.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Gwen’s POV-   
I open my eyes for the third time that day and look around. I was in the hospital. I look around and see most of the team talking on the other side of the room. I look to my side and see Spencer and Henry sleeping on the chair.   
“Well, look who is up.” I hear. I turn and see the team looking at me, smiling.   
“Hey guys.” I say and sit up.   
“How are you feeling?” Hotch asks as he walks over.   
“Better. I don’t have a headache and I’m not in any pain.” I inform him and smile.   
“Oh good. We got worried.” He says and is pushed out of the way.   
Penny comes to me and hugs me tightly. “Never make me worry again.” She tells me and lets me go. I look at her and smile. “I get worried about the others too much for either one of us to get hurt. We are the tech people. We don’t get hurt. Never get hurt again.” She tells me and nods.   
“I promise I won’t get hurt ever again.” I tell her and smile.   
“That’s all I ask.” She says and sits down.   
I look at JJ and frown. “JJ, I am so sorry.”   
She looks at me and frowns. “What for?”   
“I put your son in danger.” I say and start crying. “I understand if you hate me and never want to see me ever again.”   
JJ walks over to me and smiles softly. “Oh sweetie. You have nothing to worry about. Don’t be sorry. You didn’t plan on getting hit. You didn’t hurt Henry.”   
“But he could have gotten hurt.” I say and cry harder.   
JJ hugs and hold me. “Shh Gwen. I’m not mad at all. I know it wasn’t your fault.” She just holds until I stop crying. She draws back and smiles at me. “I’m not mad. I promise you.” I nod and sit back. I wipe my eyes and look down.   
“Gwen?” I hear Spencer ask. I look over and smile. “Hey. How are you feeling?”   
“I’m good.” I tell him. “Are you two okay?”   
“I already told you that we were.” He says and laughs.   
I look at Hotch. “When can I leave?”  
“As soon as you woke up. I’ll go get your discharge papers.” Hotch tells me and leaves the room.   
I smile at the team. “Thank you guys.”   
“For what shorty?” Morgan asks me.   
“Staying with me. Being there when I need you guys.” I tell them and look down. “I was an orphan as a baby so I really haven’t had a real family. I was bounced from foster family to foster family until I ran away from the system when I was fourteen. I’ve had to rely on myself and just myself for so long.” I tell them.   
JJ walks over to my and hugs me. Penny walks over and joins her. “Family hug!” Penny yells and the others join our hug, including Jack and Henry. Hotch walks into the room and laughs softly. “Join in sir.” Penny tells him and he shakes his hand. Morgan pulls Hotch over and they join the hug.   
“We are all crazy.” I tell them.   
Hotch laughs. “You just figured that out?”   
“Oh no. I knew that the minute I walked into the BAU.” I tell him and laugh. “You got the papers? I want to get out of here.” He hands them over and I fill them out. I saw JJ and Penny talking in secret and they kept looking over at me when they thought I wasn’t watching. I wonder what they were talking about, but I knew it probably wouldn’t be good with those two. I finish the paper work and get out of the bed. I look at shirt and frown. It had a lot of blood on it. “Well I guess I won’t be wearing this shirt anymore.”   
JJ and Penny walk back over to the group. “Nope. Blood is such a hard thing to get out of clothes.” JJ tells me.   
“Damn. Well good thing this isn’t one of my favorite shirts.” I say and look around.   
“What are you looking for?” Spencer asks me.   
“My purse.” I tell him.   
“Oh, I have it in JJ’s car. She drove me over.” He informs me.   
“I don’t have a car.” I say and freeze. How was I supposed to get to work now?   
“Since it was the drivers fault, he has to pay off the repairs.” Hotch tells me.   
“Yes, but it will probably take at least a week to get it fixed.” I say and sigh. I guess I will have to learn the underground train paths.   
“Um, I could pick you up if you want.” Spencer offers.   
I look at him and smile. “Really?”  
“Sure. You are on the way there so it won’t be a problem.” He says and smiles.   
“Okay, well that is solved.” I say and smile. “So what is the plan?”   
“Well since it is almost two o’clock, I suggest we make our way to my house and I can start making the food since we never did get any food in the hungover people.” Rossi suggests.   
“Well I don’t think anyone is hungover anymore. I think Gwen almost dying is a good cure.” Morgan says with a smile.   
“Shut up.” I say and laugh. “Whoever is taking me, can we stop at my place so I can change?”   
“What if someone takes Penelope and Rossi to their cars.” Spencer suggests.   
“Good plan. I can take Gwen to her place.” Penny offers.   
“Sounds like a plan.” I say. We all go out to the cars. JJ takes Hotch, Will, Henry, and Jack. Blake takes Spencer, Morgan, Penny, Rossi, and myself. Blake drives us to the club we were at last night and everyone gets out of the car.   
“Okay so Penelope and Gwen are going to her house. I have my car here so I can take some people who my house right now.” Rossi says.   
“I was thinking of going to get my car. Does anyone want to drive me?” Morgan asks.   
“I will. Rossi should get to his house so he can start on the food.” Blake says and everyone nods.   
“Okay so Morgan can go with Blake, Penelope and Gwen are going their own way. Spencer where are you going?” Rossi asks.   
“I’ll go with you Morgan and Blake.” Spencer says.   
“Sounds good. See you guys soon.” Rossi says and gets in his car.   
“Okay let’s go girl.” Penny says   
“Bye guys.” I say as I follow Penny. We drive to my house and I look Penny. “Thank you for this Penny.”   
“For what darling?” Penny asks.   
“For being there for me. I know you will say that it wasn’t a big deal but it was for me. I haven’t been part of anything in a while. You could have just been a co-worker but you brought me into your family right away. You gave me a family and I don’t know how to every thank you. You are not just a great friend; you are a best friend.” I tell her.   
“Oh sweetie.” Penny says softly. I could hear the tears in her eyes. “You are a best friend to me too.” We get to my apartment and she shuts the car off. She turns to me and smiles. “You are so special to us and you don’t have to worry about not having a family ever again.” She smiles.  
I hug her and grin. I finally had a family. I wasn’t a lost girl anymore. We get out and go up to my apartment. “It’s not put together yet.” I tell her as I walk to my room. The living room had one wall of shelfs and I had put all my books away. That was something I always did right away, not matter where I went. I only had a couple dishes put away and those are the ones I used. I changed into a purple sweater and some black yoga pants. I wanted to look okay but comfy. I look at my forehead where I got the cut. It was going to scar. I frown and sigh. Just another imperfection. I sigh and look away from the mirror. I don’t know why I had a mirror in my room. I didn’t like looking at myself in it, I mostly just cover it up with a blanket. I let my hair down and shake it out. I grab my purse, that Spencer gave to me before we left the hospital, and head to the living room. “I’m ready.”   
Penny looks at me and smiles. “You look so cute.” She gushes.   
I shake my head and look at my books. “No I don’t.” I laugh and slip on my shoes. “Ready?”   
She frowns at my words and nods. “Why don’t you think you look cute?”   
“I just know.” I say and shrug. We exit my apartment and I lock the door. “I know that I will never be the cute girl. I will always just be Gwen.”   
“And what’s wrong with being just Gwen?” She asks as we get into the elevator.  
“I mean that I will never be that classical beauty that is written about, or the cute next door type.” I say and lean against the wall.   
“Why do you say that?” She asks, the frown staying on her face.   
“Because I’m over weight and I’m the overweight that is still super sexy like you. I have the fat in all the wrong places.” I explain. I could feel her eyes on me but I just looked forward and hoped she would drop the subject. I knew I had body issues but I didn’t want to handle or talk about them. I didn’t have an eating disorder, trust me. I had a love affair with food. It was my best friend and my only lover. “Can we drop this? I don’t want the conversation to get weird before we go to Rossi’s.”   
“Sure.” She says softly. We get in her car and we drive to Rossi’s.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Spencer’s POV-   
Blake dropped Morgan and myself off at Morgan’s apartment and we get his car. “So what do you think of Gwen?” I ask Morgan. I was trying to seem uninterested but even I could tell that I wasn’t. Why was I even asking? I had Maeve.  
Morgan smirks and looks at me quickly. “Does someone have a crush?”  
“No I was just trying to make out if she was fitting in well.” I say, trying to get him to forget the topic that I foolishly brought up.   
“Sure pretty boy.” He says and laughs. “I’m pretty sure she is fitting in. I mean Rossi is throwing her a welcome party and we are all worried when she was hurt in the crash.”   
I nod. I was feeling a little guilty for even thinking of Gwen in any way that wasn’t just friendship, but I couldn’t help it. Something about Gwen made me interested in her in the same Maeve did. But I was in a semi relationship with Maeve I think. She was the one I have been talking to for six months. She is such a great person. I couldn’t hurt Maeve like her stalker was. I would just try and stay away from Gwen. I was determined to just let her be a friend and nothing more. I turn and look out the window waiting to get to Rossi’s.   
We get to Rossi’s the same time Penelope and Gwen did. Gwen smiles and waves at me. I nod my head and go in.  
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Gwen’s POV-   
I watch Spencer walk into Rossi’s house and frown. “What was that?” Penny asks Morgan.   
“I don’t know. He was fine on the way here.” He says and I could feel both of their eyes on me.   
“Stop pitying me.” I say and walk into the house. I see Spencer talking to JJ and Henry. I don’t know what I did to Spencer to make him be like this but I wouldn’t let it bring the night down. I go into the kitchen and see Rossi getting the food ready. “Hey Rossi.” I say and sit on a bar stool.   
“Hello gattina.” He says as he mixes meat with onion pieces.   
I frown. “Gattina?”   
He looks up at me and smiles. “It means little cat. I saw your cat tattoo on your ankle and thought it fit.” He explains.   
I look down and see my small cat tattoo and smile. “I like it.” I say and look up at him. “Need any help?”   
“Sure.” He says and I join him on his side. “Why don’t you cut up the tomatoes and lettuce.”   
“Sounds good.” I say and go to the cutting board where there was a couple tomatoes and a head of lettuce. I start cutting and thinking. I was trying to figure out what I did to make him act like he did. I guess I spaced out because I jumped and almost cut my figure when I felt a hand on my arm. “Shit.” I say and look over at Rossi.   
“I was calling your name five times.” He looks at me. I knew he was probably trying to profile me. “What’s wrong?”   
“It’s nothing Rossi.” I say and smiles softly. I turn to the counter and continue cutting.   
“Don’t give me that gattina. I don’t need to know you a long time to know when something isn’t right. Tell Rossi. I might be able to help. And if I can’t help you in what to do, I can help you in what not to do. I wasn’t married three times for nothing.” Rossi says and smiles.   
“Wait, you were married three times?” I ask, looking back at him.   
“Yes, but that isn’t the conversation we were having.” He says and takes the knife out of my hand and lays it on the counter. “Now tell me what is going on?”   
I look at Rossi and sigh. I knew that I wouldn’t be getting out of talking and Rossi made me feel safe, like a father figure. “I think I hurt Spencer’s feelings or did something.” I tell him. He leads me to the kitchen table and pours me a glass of wine. “Oh I don’t drink.” I tell him.   
“I think you need at least one glass of wine. It won’t mess you up or anything.” He says and smiles softly. He slides the glass over to me and I take it. I hadn’t drunk anything in my life. Mostly because most of the men who were in the foster homes would waste all the money on beer. I look at it and take a small sip. It was very sweet and smelled good. “Okay so continue.”   
“Well when Penny and I got here, Spencer and Morgan were arriving too. Well I got out of the car and waved to Spencer and started walking over to him. Well he did that kind of nod hello thing that people did when they really don’t care for a person and walked inside, totally ignoring me.” I explain and take a gulp of the wine.   
Rossi frowns and looks into the living room. We had a view of Spencer doing a magic trick with Jack and Henry. “I don’t know what happened. That is strange for Spencer.” He sighs and gets up. “I can talk to him if you want.”   
I stand up and yell, “No!” I cringe and look around and see no one took notice. “No, please don’t.” I say softly. “Let’s just go continue dinner.” I say and go back to chopping the tomatoes and lettuce. I hear him sigh but he goes back to the meat. I was thankful for that and finished the chopping. “Okay, I’m done with this. What should I do now?”   
“Go socialize.” He tells me and smiles.   
“What? No. I was going to help you.” I say. I wasn’t ready to face Spencer.   
“This is a party for the team to get to know you better and you got in a wreck today. You need to be taking a break. Go socialize. I can handle this gattina.” He says.   
I sigh and leave the kitchen, not without giving the stink eye to Rossi, which he just laughed at me. I see JJ and Penny talking so I join them. They instantly stop talking when I get over there and I frown. “Okay so you guys were totally not talking about me right there and you just got to the end of your conversation, right?” I ask.   
“Of course Winnie.” Penny says.   
I look at her. “Now I’m Winnie?” I ask.   
“Yes. That is my nickname for you. No one else can call you that.” Penny explains.   
“I’m going to keep calling you Gwen.” JJ say with a smile.   
“That’s is perfectly fine with me.” I tell her. I look at Penny. “So if you weren’t talking about me, then what were you talking about?”   
“Um…” Penny says, looking at JJ.   
“Accounting!” JJ makes up.   
I look at her. “Really?”   
“Um yeah. I’ve always wanted to learn accounting, but I read one of Rossi’s books and I decided to change my path and go into the FBI.” She says, not convincing me in the slightest.   
“Okay, whatever.” I wasn’t in the mood to try and figure out what they were really saying about me. I turn around and see Hotch, Blake, and Morgan talking. I head over to them with JJ and Penny calling my name behind me. Everyone was acting weird and I didn’t understand it. Not even two hours ago, everything was great but once we all separated, they got all weird. I sigh and walk up next to Morgan. “Hey guys.”   
“Hey. Have you talked to Reid?” Morgan asks me.   
“Nope. I don’t want to be ignored again.” I say and look at my nails.   
“He ignored you?” Blake asks. I hadn’t really got to know Blake as much as the others. If those three were going to be weird, I would get to know some of the older members of the team.   
“Yeah. He like walked past her when she was walking to him right in front of the house.” Morgan explains to the older two.   
“That isn’t like Reid.” Hotch says.   
I look at Hotch and smile softly. “It’s fine. It’s not that important.”   
“But it is. You are part of this family and you should be treated as such.” Morgan says.   
“Really guys. If he doesn’t want to talk to me, it’s his choice.” I say as I see Spencer walk over to us. “Now, let’s drop it.”   
Hotch sighs and nods. “Fine.”   
Spencer stands next to me and looks at me. “Gwen, can we talk alone for a moment?”   
I smile softly and nod. “Sure Spencer.”   
We go into an office and I lean against the desk. Spencer paces a little and looks at me. I smile at him and he looks down. He was nervous. I didn’t need to be a profiler to know that. “Spencer?”   
Spencer stops by the bookshelf and looks at the floor. I was getting worried and so I start walking to him but he moves back. I frown and try to get a look at his face. “I can’t come over to watch Doctor Who anymore. I forgot I had already promised my time to Morgan. He wants to get me more in shape or something.” He looks at me and smiles softly. “That’s why I ignored you at the door. I was worried that you would be mad at me. You understand right?”   
I look at him for a moment, trying to see if he was lying. I don’t think he is so I nod and smile. “Of course Spencer.” I grin and hug him softly. I was so happy that he wasn’t mad at me. I let him go and head to the door. “Let’s get back out there.” I say and go back to Hotch, Blake, and Morgan. “That problem is solved.” I say and grin.   
“He told you why he ignored you?” Hotch asks.   
“Yup. Morgan why didn’t you just tell me that he was nervous that I would be mad at him?” I ask Morgan.   
Morgan frowns. “Um, I don’t follow.” He says, looking at Hotch and Blake.   
“He can’t come over to my apartment because he is doing some kind of training with you and he thought I would be mad because he forgot.” I explain and laugh. “But of course I wouldn’t be mad. I mean there is always going to be Doctor Who marathons on.”   
“Um, I didn’t have any plans with Reid tomorrow.” Morgan says slowly.   
I look at Spencer and he looked sad. I frown and storm over to him. “Why? Why lie to me?” I ask, getting tears in my eyes. “Why not just tell me that you don’t want to hang out? I know I’m new and all but I am person. I thought we were friend Spencer Reid. You have an IQ of 187 yet you are just like everyone else. You are a liar Spencer Reid and a cruel person.” I say as I feel a tear fall from my eyes. Spencer looks ashamed and he should. I don’t understand what happened. He opens his mouth to say something and then shuts it and looks down. I shake my head. “Don’t talk to me about anything that doesn’t pertain to work.” I say and storm into the kitchen. I wipe my eyes and look down. “I’m sorry Rossi, but I can’t be staying. I’m sorry.” I say softly, trying not to cry. I didn’t understand what was going on.   
“Gattina, what’s wrong? What have I missed?” Rossi asks as he walks over to me.   
“I just want to go home.” I say and wrap my arms around myself as much as I could. I was getting very tired from this too long day. I would trade this day for my first work day. At least I was happy then.   
“Okay, do you want me to take you home.” He asks.   
“No, I’ll take her.” I hear Penny say behind me.   
“Okay. I’ll see you Monday. Do you want to bring any food home?” He asks.   
“Thank you, but no.” I say and leave the kitchen, grabbing my purse on the way out. Spencer tries to walk towards me, but Morgan stops him. I was thankful for that. I don’t know how much more I could take. “Bye guys. I’ll see you Monday.” I say and leave the house. I get into Penny’s car and lean my head against the window. Penny gets into the car and looks at me. She opens her mouth and I just shake my head. “I really don’t want to talk about it yet. You will be the first person I call.” She nods and takes me home. I sit up when we get to my apartment and I look at her. “Thank you. You are going back to Rossi’s?”   
“Yeah.” She says softly.   
“Tell Rossi, Hotch, and Morgan thank you for me.” I tell her and get out. “I’ll see you Monday.”   
“See you Monday.” She says as I shut the door. I go up to my apartment and get in my bed without changing. I don’t understand how this day when from a good day to a bad one. I just didn’t understand.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Criminal Minds.   
> Please Read and Review.

It had been a month since the bad day, as it was claimed in my mind. I was hiding out in Penny’s lair most of the time when I was at work. Spencer tried to talk to me that first Monday, but I ignored him and just kept walking. I didn’t want to understand why someone could just change like that. The team had a couple major cases and few minor ones that kept them in the D.C. area. While the team didn’t have cases, Penny taught me some tech stuff that I didn’t know. She helped me remember my programing languages, such as Java and C++. She also taught me some hacking tricks. It was a great way to get my mind off of Spencer.   
Penny was out getting dinner for us, while I waited. I didn’t want to have a chance of seeing Spencer. I let out a big sigh. I was still hurting. What was so bad that he had to lie to me. It was making me so upset. Not to mention, I was missing him. He understood me more than the others. The only one to know me more is Penny and that’s because she spends a lot of time with me. I couldn’t spend a lot of time with the team either, which was awful. If they were hanging out, then most of the time Spencer was with them. I went one time and it was a mess. Spencer would keep trying to talk to me and Morgan and Rossi would make him stop. I left after being there for only fifteen minutes.   
I still had to deal with Spencer for work and I would put up a front so no one would worry. It was really hard and on those days I would go and get a pint of ice cream after work. This week the team was working a case in New Mexico with a man who amputated people’s legs. It was super interesting. While Penny hated to look at the case photos, I loved it. I wanted to see if I could get any information from the photos so I could help the team in any way. I was looking at some of the photos when the phone rang. I slid my chair over and pressed the intercom button. “Your all-knowing magician is at your command. What is it you wish to know this day young mortal?” I ask.   
“Oh Gwen.” I hear Spencer say and I frown. “Um hi… um can you tell me where the nearest payphone is?”   
I sigh and start looking it up. “Why do you need a payphone? You have a cell phone.”   
“Please Gwen…” He says softly.   
“Give me a second. Payphone aren’t really used anymore. Google maps does just come out and say ‘oh here is a payphone’”. I tell him.   
“Try local telecoms.” He tells me.   
I roll my eyes. “I’m already doing that. Who do you think is training me?” I find one. “Okay there is one five miles away and it is already on your cell. Which you also can use to call people.”   
“Thank you Gwen.” He tells me. I just hum in the phone. “Can we talk when I get back? I would like to explain myself.”   
“No Spencer. I can’t do this.” I say, tear coming to my eyes. “I just can’t.” I hang up and put my head in my heads and groans.   
“Oh no. Did Spencer call?” I hear behind me. I just nod. “Did he ask you to talk again?”   
“Yes.” I sit up and look at her. “I can’t keep doing this. It’s so hard. He was becoming a really good friend and now I can’t even talk to him. The other day there was that Doctor Who article that I linked you too and I almost called him to talk to him about it. Then I realized I couldn’t.” I felt a tear slip down my cheek and I wiped it off. I sigh and look at her. “What did you get us for dinner. I need food.”   
She sits down next to me and puts the food aside. “Gwen, you aren’t thinking of leaving the team, are you?” She says with a frown.   
“Oh no. I love this team. You guys are my family.” I say, reassuring her and myself. “I just need to figure out some things.” I say and smiles at her. “You guys are not getting rid of me.”   
“Oh good.” She says and grabs the food. “I got us Chinese.”   
“Oh yes!” I say and laugh. While eating, I thought about Spencer and the team. I had thought of leaving the team a couple times, especially after a really bad day. I needed to talk to Spencer to get this thing buried. The team solved the case and were coming home.   
“Winnie, do you want to join the team for drinks?” Penny asked me before the team got back.   
“No. I think I’m going to talk to Spencer and go home.” I tell her.   
“You’re going to talk to him? Do you want me or someone to stay?” Penny asks.   
I smile and shake my head. “No. I think we need to do this alone.” The elevator doors open and the team comes in. I smile at everyone.   
“Hello Gattina. I would have thought you would be gone?” Rossi comes over to me and smiles.   
“No. I think I need to have a talk with Spencer.” I say and smile.   
Rossi frowns and looks at Spencer, who was looking at us. “Do you want me to stay?”   
I smile at how much the team was looking out for me. Rossi was so protective of me and I was happy for it. He was like the dad figure I always needed in my life. I place my hand on his arm and he looks back at me. “I’ll be fine.”   
He just looks at me and sighs. “Okay, but if you need to, I’m going straight home and you are always welcome there.”   
“I know Rossi. Thank you.” I say and hug him.   
I’m guessing I caught him off guard because he didn’t hug me back right away. I felt him relax and hug me back. “Any time Gattina.” We part and I watch him leave with most of the team.   
I look over and see Spencer trying to look busy at his desk. I slowly take a breath and walk over there. “Can we talk?”   
Spencer looks up, looking hopeful, and nods. “Where to?”   
“Let’s just go to the round table room.” I say.   
“You know that’s not what it is really called, right?” He asks, smiling softly.   
“I know, but that’s what I call it.” I tell him. I walk to the room, with Spencer following. I look inside Hotch’s office and see that he is still there. He looked like he was working, but I caught his eye as I passed. I was pretty sure either Rossi or Penny asked him to stay and watch over me. I was kind of okay with this. We get to the room and I shut the door. I sit down in a seat and look at him. “Explain. You have ten minutes. I don’t want to waste my whole night.”   
He nods and sits down. “Gwen. I know I’m an ass who doesn’t deserve a chance to explain myself to you, but thank you.”   
“I’m doing this for me, not you.” I tell him, crossing my arms.   
“I know.” He looks at me and sighs. “Okay where to start.”   
“Why not when you decided to lie to me and betray my trust.” I say.   
He nods and looks down. “Okay.” He plays with his hands and I knew he was nervous. “Okay. So when we were getting to know each other, I kind of started to think of you in a different way.” He says and closes his eyes. I sat up and kind of felt a little hopeful. “But I knew that I couldn’t do anything about it.”   
“Why not? There isn’t a rule about agents dating.” I say, frowning.   
He looks up at me and nods. “No there isn’t, but I’m kind of seeing someone.” He says and looks down.   
I slump down and nod. “Oh.”   
He looks at me and moves his chair closer to mine. “I know I did things wrong and I’m the world’s biggest ass and I know that what I did can’t be forgiven right away but please know that I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”   
I nod and close my eyes. “You shouldn’t have lied to me. You could have told me about this girl.” I look at him and frown. “Why didn’t you just tell me?”   
“No one knows. Well, now Blake knows, but no one else. The others wouldn’t understand the relationship and they would just joke about it. I didn’t want anyone knowing.”   
“Why wouldn’t they understand?” I ask. “They would be so happy that you have someone out there for you.”   
“We have never met.” He says softly. “I had been getting these headaches and I went to a lot of doctors and they all said it was nothing, but I knew it wasn’t just nothing. So I sent my scans to this geneticist, and she helped me. She figured out what was wrong and got me the help I needed and we just kept talking. It’s been seven months now and we haven’t met.” He says and looks at me. “I just didn’t want to mess things up with her and I didn’t want to lead you on and I just freaked.”   
I sigh and nod. “Okay Spencer, I understand why you did it, not saying that you did it in the right way, because you didn’t, but I understand.” I take his hands. “Spencer, you can always trust me. If you felt this, you should have just told me. I wouldn’t have told anyone, not even Penny. I am trustworthy.” I take my hands back. “I’m not totally forgiving you yet. I have been hurt in this month and you explaining yourself helped but it didn’t change what happened. It’s going to take some time to get back to where we were, but I would like to try to be friends again.”   
Spencer looks up at me and grins. “Really?”   
“On a temporary basis. If you mess up again, that’s it. I won’t be your friend or anything.” I tell him and stand up.   
He nods and stands up. “I can live with this.” He smiles at me. “Thank you for this Gwen.”   
I smile and nod. “I can understand how it feels to mess up. I mean I am a twenty-six-year-old who is just now doing her internship.”   
“I’m guessing there is a story there?” Spencer asks.   
“Of course there is, but you will have to wait for it.” I say and leave the room. I look back at Spencer and smile softly. “Good night Spencer.” I go to Hotch’s office and knock. I hear a soft ‘come in’ and I enter the office and shut the door behind me. “You can go home now. We talked.”   
He looks at me, trying to look confused. “I don’t know what you mean.”   
I sit down in the seat in front of his desk. “Penny?” I guess who asked.   
He sighs and nod. “Yes. We were all worried. She told us before we left and I offered to stay and make sure that you weren’t too upset.” He tells me. He looks at me. “You don’t look upset at all. Good talk?”   
I nod and bring my knees to my chest. “Yeah. I think things will be good from here on out. I’m sorry sir if things were complicated because of my drama.”   
He shakes his head. “Gwen, there is always drama. This was just the drama of the month.” He smirks at me.   
I roll my eyes and get up. “Okay, well you can go home. I’m going to do that myself and sleep.”   
“Same.” He says and stands up. “Do you want me to walk you out?”   
“No. You get home to Jack. Tell him hi for me.” I say and go to the door.   
“Will do. And Gwen?” He says. I turn around and see him smiling at me. “Have a good weekend.”   
I nod and smile. “You too sir.” I say and leave his office. I see Spencer sitting at his desk. He looks up when he hears the door close. “Why are you still here?”   
“Was waiting for you.” He says and gets up.   
“You didn’t need to do that. You don’t have to go out of your way for me now.” I tell him and walk to his desk. “But thank you.”   
He nods and we walk to the elevator in silence. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence, it was nice. I look at Spencer and smile. “Oh did watch the Doctor Who episode? Angles take Manhattan?”   
He grins and nods. “Of course!” We talked about the episode all the way to our cars and I could tell that everything would be better.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
The following week was Halloween and since it was my favorite holiday, I was getting very into it. I was wearing my awesome Halloween sweaters all week and was passing out candy to the members of the team before they got called out on a case. They got back the morning of Halloween, which I knew JJ was happy about. Henry was feeling scared about going trick or treating and she wanted to be there if he did want to go out.   
I was hanging out with Spencer, talking about the plans for tonight. He was coming over and we were going to watch all the great Halloween movies. I see Rossi and Morgan walking down the stairs and I wave to them. “Gattina, want to come to dinner with Morgan and myself?”   
“No thanks. Spencer and I are going to watch some really awesome Halloween movies.” I tell them and look at Spencer. “We have to start with Rocky Horror. It is the cult classic that just makes Halloween. We can get to the ‘scarier’ ones later in the night.” I say, doing air quotes around the word scarier.   
“We have to start with something scary. It will set the whole night up.” He tells me.   
I was about to continue to argue when JJ walks in. “Um, excuse me everybody. I have an announcement to make.” I turn around and face JJ. “As I’m sure you were aware; Henry was a little nervous about going Trick or Treat this year, but he has decided to go anyway.”   
“Great, what changed his mind?” Rossi asks.   
“The BAU did. I told him he should go out on Halloween and try to figure out which monsters are real and which ones are not.” JJ explains.   
I smile. “So he wants to be a profiler.” Morgan says.   
“Ah, he wants to be his favorite profiler.” JJ says and turns around.   
In walks Henry dressed up as Spencer with Penny as a witch. “Woah!” Spencer says and gets up. He goes to Henry. “Oh wow.” Morgan and Rossi just smile and laugh. Spencer kneels down and smiles. “You look great, Henry.” Spencer takes off his badge and clips it on Henry’s bag.   
“He is official.” I say and get off of Spencer’s desk. I walk over to Spencer and Henry.   
Penny walks over and whispers “Tell him.” In Henry’s ear.   
Spencer and I look at Henry with smiles. “E equals MC square!” Henry says, proudly. Spencer just looks so happy and gives him a high five.   
“The monsters don’t stand a chance.” Blake says and smiles at JJ.   
“Oh I know.” JJ says and looks at Henry. “Should we go get some candy?” JJ and Penny take Henry’s hand.   
“Can aunt Gwen come with?” Henry asks JJ.   
JJ looks at me. “Want to come with Aunt Gwen?” She asks with a smile.   
I look at Spencer. “Delay on the movie night?” I ask him.   
He smiles and nods. “Just text me when you want me to come over.” He tells me and smiles at Henry. “Take good care of Gwen.”   
“She will be safe.” Henry says and runs over to me. I pick him up and smiles at him. “I keep you safe from the monsters Aunt Gwen.”   
“I feel super safe Henry.” I say and look at Spencer. “See you later.” I walk to JJ and Penny and smile. “Ready?”   
“Oh course.” We all get into JJ’s car and go trick or treating. “So what is happening with you and Spencer?” JJ asks, as she watches Penny walk with Henry to the houses.   
“What do you mean?” I ask. “We are getting along.”   
“No I know that,” She says and looks at me. “A movie date tonight? You guys are getting really close.”   
I laugh and shake my head. “Oh no. We are just friends.” I tell her. I would love to me more with Spencer but I just forget my feelings and be a supporting friend. I remember the next day, Spencer called me up all freaked out. Maeve, which was the name of the girl’s name, had told Spencer that she loves him and hung up. He told me that he couldn’t say it back because he wanted to say it in person. He was so cute and I was happy for him.   
JJ was looking at me and shakes her head. “Sure.” She says and looks back at Henry. I watch him too. I didn’t care if no one believed me. I was just happy to be getting back in a friendship with Spencer.   
We finished trick or treating around eight o’clock and I told everyone goodbye and went home. I got into my comfy clothes, which was sweat pants and a tank top. I put a hoodie on and called Spencer.   
“Hey, how much candy did Henry get?” He asks as he answers the phone.   
“So much. I feel bad for JJ and Will. They are going to have a super hyper child.” I say with a laugh.   
“They can handle him.” He says. “Want me to come over?”   
“Yes. What type of pizza?” I ask.   
“Any kind.” He tells me. “I’ll be there in ten.”   
We hang up and I order a mushroom and black olive pizza. I get up and get Rocky Horror ready. The doorbell rang and I knew it would be Spencer. “Come in.” I tell him. He walks in and smiles. “I have Rocky Horror loading.”   
“Oh come on. Can’t we watch something scarier?” He asks, standing by the door.   
I look over at him. “Aren’t you coming in?” I ask.   
“Um yeah. Do you want me to take my shoes off?” He asks.   
“Oh you haven’t been here yet.” I say and walk to him. “Yeah, your shoes can just sit by the door.” He takes off his shoes and his jacket. I take the jacket and put it on a hook by the door. “Let me give you the tour.” I tell him and walk more into the living room. “So this is the living room. I finally got it unpacked with Penny’s help.” I walk into the kitchen and he follows. “My small kitchen but I don’t use it that often so it works.” I walk out of the kitchen and down the short hallway. “This door is the bathroom.” I point to the first door on the right. “This is my office.” I point to the first door on the left. “And this is my bedroom.” I say as I go into the last room. “I have a walk in closet and my own master bathroom, so I love it.” I tell him and look at him. He was looking around, probably profiling what he saw. “Any new information on me?”   
“You are neat and everything has its place. I can see that you color code your closet, which shows that you are very organized but you aren’t OCD. I know that because your shoes are left out from last night and you aren’t bugged by it. You have photos of the team on the outside of your mirror, which means that you really care for us and not just the team but the whole family. You have longed for a family and are happy that you finally have one.” He looks at me. “Am I right?”   
I nod and smile. “Yes, you are.” I walk to him. “Very good. Now let’s go watch Rocky Horror.” I grin and walk out of my room.   
“Come on Gwen. Anything else. I beg.” He says as he follows me.   
“Nope. I get the first pick.” I tell him and sit on the couch. He sits next to me and looks at me. “Why the hate for one of the best movies out there?”   
“It’s just a bad movie.” He says and crosses his arms.   
I turn on the couch and bring my knees to my chest. “I’m guessing that you have a story about hating Rocky. Let’s hear it.”   
He sighs and nods. “This girl asked me to go to one of those live versions in college. Now I was 18 and was finishing my second Doctorate in Chemistry and my bachelor in psychology. So I wasn’t really getting out and doing anything but studying. I would spend most of my time in the library or my dorm.” He says and sighs. He brings his legs up on the couch and crosses them. “Well this really pretty girl in a psych class asked if I wanted to go with her and I said sure. Well she told me to meet her at the ticket booth. So I waited there for probably an hour, waiting for her. I knew the show already started but I was hopeful. Well the movie finished and out she came with some other guy. I walked up to her and asked her why she stood me up. Well the guy with her was her boyfriend and she told her boyfriend that I had asked her to the show and that I was stalking her. Her boyfriend believed her and I got beat up.” He finishes and looks down.   
I move over a little and grab his hand. “I’m sorry that happened to you.” I tell him. I smile and stand up. “Wait here.” I run to my room and change into my Magenta costume and grab my blue bathrobe and some pretend glasses I kept. I run out to the living room and grin. “We are going to erase that memory Spencer.”   
He looks up and laughs. “What are you supposed to be?” He asks.   
“I’m Magenta from the movie.” I move over to him and have him stand up. “Put these on.”   
“Why?” He looks at the things and then at me.   
“Just trust me.” I tell him. He nods and puts it on. I get on the couch and mess his hair up and grin. “Perfect. You are Brad Majors.”   
“Who?” He asks.   
“He is in the movie.” I tell him.   
“You know I can’t forget a memory right?” He asks.   
“Yes, but we can put a positive spin on your Rocky experience.” I tell him as the doorbell rings. “Oh pizza!” I go open the door and smile. “Pizza.”   
“Yes.” The pizza boy says and gets out the pizza I ordered. I grab the money I set aside for the pizza and gave it to him.   
“Keep the change.” I tell him as he gives me the pizza.  
“Thanks Magenta.” He tells me and leaves.   
I grin and close the door. “Even the pizza man knew who I was. You need to know this movie.” I bring the pizza to the couch and sits down. Spencer sits down. “Can we try and watch this?”   
He looks at me and nods. “Okay. Since you got all dressed up for it.”   
I squeal and clap. “Great.” I look at him and grin. “Warning now. I will be dancing and singing.”   
“There is songs?” He asks.   
I grin and nod. “And dance numbers.”   
“What have you got me into Gwen?” He asks.   
“The most wonderful thing in the world.” I tell him and turn the movie on.   
We finish the movie and I look over at Spencer and grin. “So?”   
“It wasn’t bad. I kind of enjoyed it.” He tells me and smiles.   
“Yay!” I clap and grin. “Now your pick. What did you bring?”   
“Chucky.” He says with a grin.   
I frown and glare at him. “You are an evil person.” I had told him about my hatred of dolls when we were first getting to know each other. “Why do you hate me?”   
“I watched your movie when I didn’t want to, so now it’s your turn.” He tells me.   
I sigh and nod. “Okay. Let’s do this.” I tell him.   
We watch the movie and I look over at Spencer and smile. He had fallen asleep during the movie. I get up slowly and move his feet onto the couch. I take the fake glasses off his face and cover him with a blanket. He opens his eyes a little. “Thank you.” He says.   
“Of course. Get some sleep. Don’t worry about going home.” I tell him.   
He nods and snuggles into the couch. “Thanks.” He says as he goes back to sleep.   
I go to my room and change into my pajamas. I get into bed and think how life has gotten better in a short week.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Criminal Minds  
> Please Read and Review

It had been a couple months since Halloween. Spencer and I were becoming really good. He told me more about Maeve and her situation. Only Blake and I were the only ones who knew about Maeve. A month after Halloween Spencer called me.   
“She wants to meet.” Spencer says as soon as I answer the phone.   
“Well, hello to you too. Yes, I did sleep well. How about you?” I say with a smirk on my face.   
“Gwen.” He says.   
I laugh. “Okay. She wants to meet. This is a good thing.” I tell him. “It means that the stalker thing is getting better.”   
“Yes but I’m me.” He says.   
“Yes, and she is her?” I ask, not knowing what he is meaning.   
“I mean I’m not the type of guy girls go towards. That is Morgan. I’m a nerd and I ramble about useless stuff. What if she gets there and doesn’t like what she sees?” He asks.   
“Oh Spence. You will be fine. I mean, she is probably worried about the same thing.” I tell him.   
“She doesn’t need to. I already know she is the most beautiful girl out there.” He tells me.   
At times like this, I wish my crush had truly gone away. I knew he was in love with someone else and it was someone who made him so happy. I was happy for him but it didn’t mean that times like this didn’t make me want to sob. “Spencer. She will love you. She already loves one of the most important things about you.”   
“My brain?” He asks.   
“No, your personality. You have talked to his girl for nine months now. She knows you ramble about interesting things and she knows how you are the sweetest, kindest, and best person in the world. She will love you.” I tell him. “She is the luckiest girl in the world.”   
He takes a deep breath. “Thanks Gwen.”   
“Anytime Spencer.” I tell him.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
I hear a phone ring and slowly look at my clock. It was three in the morning. I answer. “Spencer. Please tell me we have a case and you aren’t calling about something else.” I say when I answer the phone.   
“I had the dream again.” He tells me.   
“The one where you are marring her?” I ask, sitting up. “Isn’t this like your fifth one?”   
“Yes. I need them to stop.” He tells me.   
“You need to meet her. If there is any truth to your dream, then you really love her. So much you might want to marry her, but you need to meet her.” I tell him. I sigh and bring my knees to my chest.   
“I know. I get to talk to her tomorrow. Maybe I should just tell her that we need to meet once and for all.” He tells me.   
“That sounds like a plan.” I tell him and yawn.   
“Go back to bed.” He says.   
“Will you?” I ask him, already knowing the answer.   
“No. I’m going to read it again.” He tells me. I knew he was talking about the Arthur Conan Doyle book that Maeve left him at the restaurant.   
I sigh. “Are you sure you want to do that? Shouldn’t you try and sleep.”   
“I’ll just have the dream again. I figured that out after the first dream.” He tells me.   
“I know.” I sigh and lay down. “Just try and get at least two more hours.”   
“I’ll try. Thanks Gwen.” He tells me. “See you Monday.”   
“See you Monday.” I tell him and hang up my phone. It was hard to hear Spencer talking about this girl in these ways but I was hoping that my crush would soon go away and I would be better. Penny was trying to set me up with people but it would never work. They weren’t right. They weren’t Spencer. I slowly fall back to sleep.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
I get a call early the next morning. “Spencer. Just tell her that you want to meet.” I say. I didn’t look at my phone, assuming it was Spencer flaking out on tell Maeve.   
“Gattina. We need you at the office. Spencer needs up.” Rossi tells me.   
I sit up and get out of bed. “On my way.” I tell him and hang up. I hurry and get dress. I grab my keys, purse, and phone and leave. I get to the office and see everyone sitting around Spencer. I rush to him and hug him. He just stands there. “Is it Maeve?” I ask and look up at him. He nods. I stand to the side, holding his hand.   
“I have a wealth of knowledge I should be applying to this case. Behavioral patterns of violent stalkers. Tactical recovery strategies. Victim survival odds. But right now I can't focus on anything more than 4 seconds at a time. Which makes me the dumbest person in the room. So... Please help me. Help me find her.” He pleads with the team.   
“We don't know if we have a case. So we'll be working on personal time. Does anybody want to leave?” Hotch asks us and looks around. No one moves. “Good. Let's get to work.”   
The team heads for the round table room and I look at Spencer. “Are you okay?”   
He looks at me. “No, I’m not. I need her found Gwen.” He tells me.   
I have never seen him this upset and I knew the team and myself would do anything in our power to help him. “We will find her Spencer. I promise you. You will meet her and you will finally tell her that you love her.” I say. “Let’s get to the team.” We walk to the room. Hotch is passing out letters. “These all of them?”   
“Yeah. After the last one, we started talking on the phone.” Spencer tells us. I move to the other computer Penny brought in for me. I start trying to find Maeve. I want to find her as much as Spencer does. I want him happy. I need him happy and right now finding this girl was the only way to make him happy.   
“Based on Maeve's description of the unsub in her letters, he seems like a classically possessive stalker.” Morgan says.   
“One who craves validation and recognition. "What won't you see me?" "Do you think you're better than me?" This comes up again and again.” JJ says.   
“So does his suicidal ideation. ‘When I find you, I'm going to kill you, then myself.’” Blake says.   
“Murder-suicide is the ultimate "I love you" to these guys.” Rossi says and looks around at the team.   
“When did the unsub start targeting Maeve?” Hotch asks Spencer.   
“Maeve said it started out of the blue. My guess is it was some sort of incidental interaction, something she probably wasn't even aware of.” Spencer tells the team.   
“That's gonna make the unsub hard to find.” Morgan says.   
“And Maeve, too, until we know more about her.” JJ says.   
“I found her.” I say and look at the photo of a brunette woman. She was pretty and looked smart. “There are not many geneticists with that name, but... Dr. Maeve Donovan took a sabbatical from Mendel University 10 months ago.” I look at Spencer and then back at the computer to dig up more.   
“That fits the timeline.” JJ says.   
“Oh, she's a smart cookie. She burned her credit history, but her parents rented a loft in the warehouse district 5 days ago.” I tell them.   
“Did the parents sell their house recently?” Rossi asks.   
“No.” I say looking up at Spencer.   
“They might be helping her hide.” Rossi says.  
“Morgan, you and JJ go to the loft. Blake and Dave, go to the lab. How clear is your head?” Hotch asks Spencer.   
“Not very clear.” Spencer says, looking down.   
“I want to talk to her parents, but I want you to observe the interview.” Hotch tells Spencer and stands up.   
“Spencer. I have a picture of her. Do you want to see what she looks like?” I tell him, feeling sad for him.   
“No.” He says and leaves with Hotch.   
I sigh and look at Penny. “Good work.” She tells me.   
“You found the information before I did, didn’t you?” I ask.   
“Yes, but I figured you needed to find it.” She says and comes over to me. “How long have you known?”   
“Since we got back on better terms. That is why he lied to me. He said that he was getting feelings for me but didn’t want to hurt Maeve. She was special to him and he wanted to get to know her. He was falling in love with her. I couldn’t do anything.” I tell her. I send the addresses to the team and sigh. “We need to find her.”   
“We will.” She tells me and places a hand on my arm.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
After an hour, I get a call from Spencer. “Look up Bobby Putnam.” He tells me.   
“Okay who is that?” I ask, typing the name into the database.   
“Maeve ex-fiancé.” He tells me.   
“Oh shit. Did you know about him?” I ask.   
“If I knew, you would have already looked him up Gwendolyn.” Spencer yells at me.   
I could hear Hotch in the background telling Spencer to control himself. “I sent you his address.” I tell him and he hangs up.   
“What was that about?” Penny asks me. We were back at her lair.   
“Maeve had a fiancé.” I tell her. “They ended it and the team is going to question him”  
I get a call thirty minutes later. “He was at the restaurant.” Spencer tells me.   
“Who? Bobby?” I ask.   
“Yes. He was there and now I can’t talk to him.” He tells me. “Why was he there Gwen?”   
“I don’t know.” I tell him.   
“I’ll let you go. Please find her.” He tells me and hangs up.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR   
After another thirty minutes, JJ rushes into the room holding a folder. “There are photos in this. We need to scan them.” She tells us.   
“Let’s get to work.” I say and we start scanning the photos.   
We were almost done when Penny says, “Ok, I'm sharing something I haven't told anyone.” She looks at us. “Every time we have a stalking case, I think Rosanna Arquette.”  
“The whole Arquette family to choose from and you go with Rosanna.” JJ says with a smile.  
“Of course I go with Rosanna, because Rosanna Arquette was the inspiration for two seminal songs of my childhood. "Rosanna, " by Toto...” She explains.   
“Obviously.” I say.   
“And "In Your Eyes" by Peter Gabriel. Which gives one pause to think of the myriad of ways a man can be obsessed by a woman, and what is she doing in bed to inspire that kind of obsession, and can she teach us? Because I want to know.” Penny finishes.   
JJ brings out one of the last photos and I see eyeliner crossing out Maeve’s face. “Whoa. He went to town on that one.” I say and look at the photo.   
“JJ, is that...” Penny asks.   
She nods and runs out of the lair with the photo. I look at Penny and frown. “A woman? Why would a woman take her?”   
“I’m not sure.” Penny says and looks at the photos.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
Penny gets a call. “Yes?”   
“Look up Bobby’s girlfriend. Her name is Diane Huntington. She is our unsub.” Hotch tells us.   
“Got it.” She tells him and hangs up.   
“Let’s get to work.” I tell her and we start digging.   
After a half an hour, Penny calls Morgan. “Hey, doll face, what do you got?”   
“An identity that’s pure vapor.” Penny says. “Diane Huntington is a fake name.”   
“So is her address.” I tell them.   
“And all the phone conversations she had with Bobby were from a burner phone.” Penny tells them.   
“All right, keep digging and keep us posted.” Hotch tells us.   
“I’m sorry Spencer.” I call over the phone before Morgan could hang up.   
“I know.” I hear him say softly and then Morgan hangs up.   
“We need to find this girl Penny. I need the true Spencer back.” I tell her. “We have to.”   
“We will. I promise you.” She says and we get back to digging.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
Spencer walks into the lair. “Gwen. I need you.” He says.   
I turn around. “We are trying to find this girl. I’m trying my hardest.” I tell him.   
“Come with me?” He asks.   
I look at Penny and she nods. “Okay.” I get up and follow him to his car. Blake was waiting for us. “Where are we going?”   
“To the park to play chess.” She tells us.   
“Why?” I ask.   
“I need help sorting out my information and I can’t do it alone.” Spencer tells me.   
I stop. “I can’t help you with that. I’m not a profiler.” I tell him. “I won’t be any help. You have Blake. She will be able to help you more than I can.”   
He walks to me. “You can. You are smarter than you think. I believe you can help me.” He looks at me and puts his hand out. “Trust me?” I look at him hand and nod. I place my hand in his and we get into his car and drive to a local park.   
Spencer and Blake sit at a chess board and I sit next to Spencer. “You want to talk here?” Spencer asks.   
“Yep.” Blake says.   
“You play?” Spencer asks her.  
“Yeah, I know my way around a board, but... That's not the point. I want you to focus here and not on my questions. So, let's try this out.” Blake says and moves a piece. “When you think of Maeve, what's the first thing that comes to mind?”  
“Thomas Merton.” Spencer says as he moves a piece.   
“What about him?” I ask, watching Spencer.  
“In her letters, she would always sign off with a quote from one of her favorite philosophers. Camus, Voltaire, Plato. When we had the near miss at the restaurant a couple of weeks ago, she left me a book with a quote by Thomas Merton written inside. It said, ‘Love is our true destiny. "We do not find the meaning of life by ourselves alone. We find it in another.’” Spencer explains.   
“Then... Thomas Merton was her way of saying good-bye.” Blake says.   
“Yeah.” Spencer says.   
“That is so interesting. Really. So if you two had this deep connection where you're talking in your own code, why do you think the unsub would attack the fiancé first?” Blake asks as she moves another piece.   
“I don't know, access, maybe.” Spencer suggests.   
“No, something links the two of you in the unsub's mind.” Blake says and moves a piece.  
“She wants to destroy anyone Maeve had a romantic relationship with?” Spencer asks, moving a piece.   
“It could be jealousy or revenge.” I suggest. They look at me. “Maybe Maeve got in the way of one of her old relationships?”   
“It’s just not her.” Spencer says and frowns at me. I rest my head on his shoulder, trying to comfort him. I hated seeing him like this. He reaches for my hand and I squeeze it.   
“Did you guys ever compare lists? The different people you dated?” Blake asks.   
“November 4, 3:46 p.m. I asked her if she dated a lot growing up. She told me ‘no way. Do you know how many Friday nights I had where it was just me and a microscope?’ I told her that I thought that was just me.” He said and chuckled. “She said ‘Oh, come on. Girls must have adored you in high school.’ I told her that I was 12. It was kind of confusing. Once I got a note from this girl I had a crush on. She thought I was cute but would only meet me if I wore a blindfold. I did. And she took my shirt off. That's when I heard the laughter. Most of the senior class was in there.” He tells us. I squeeze his hand and frown. People could be so mean when they didn’t know how to act around certain people.   
“Oh, it sounds awful.” Blake said.   
“Maeve thought so, too. She told me, ‘when we finally meet, I'm going to make blindfolds fun again.’” He said.   
“What about co-workers? Maeve was the only female doctor at Mendel University. What was it like for her?” I ask him, not moving from where I was at.   
“She once spoke about the awkwardness of being the only woman in the department. She said ‘when men are jealous of your success in the lab, they want it for themselves. But women want it so you can't have it. Sometimes this institution turns us against each other.’” He sits up straighter and I sit up and look at him. “What if the unsub worked there but wasn't a doctor? What if she was a grad student maybe working on her Ph. D. there?”  
“Yeah, but how could Maeve miss her?” Blake asks.  
“Each of the doctors has their own project. Each project has its own team of research assistants. They don't mingle, but they'd be the first applicants for an open position.” Spencer explains.   
“And if Maeve rejected her thesis, the unsub would take it personally.” I say as I understand.   
“And that rejection has become an obsession to possess.” Spencer says. He looks at me and smiles. “We need to get you to Penny so you two computer genius can figure this out.” He gets up and holds out his hand. I take it and stand up. In the car, Blake calls Penny and tells her the information.   
We get to the BAU and we go to the round table room. “I got some information.” Penny tells us and pulls some things up on the projector. “Her name is Diane Turner. She worked as a research assistant at Mendel University while Maeve was there.” Penny tells Spencer.   
“Did she apply for a Ph. D. There?” JJ asks.   
“Yeah. She was one of a bunch of internal applicants that got rejected.” Penny tells us.   
“Looks like she left not long after Maeve.” Rossi says after looking at the file.   
“Correct. She now works at a local junior college.” Penny says and sits down.   
“Dave, you, Reid, and JJ take the residence. Blake and Morgan, take the campus.” Hotch tells the team.   
What was her doctoral thesis about?” Spencer asks.   
“It says here, ‘Spontaneous cellular death in suicide patients.’” Morgan tells us.   
“There's her suicidal ideation again.” Blake says.   
“Except cells don't behave that way. Why is she so obsessed with it?” Spencer asks.   
The team leave, Spencer looking back at me once before he leaves   
Penny and I go to the lair and look more into this Diane woman. We get a call a little later. “Garcia.” JJ says.   
“What you got, mama grizzly?” Penny asks.   
“There’s a web cam in here. Can you hack the feed?” JJ asks.   
Penny looks at me. “You’re up to bat.”   
I nod and sigh. “I’m on it.” I start working on it. I was trying my hardest. “I’m not getting through. She She's spoofing the IP address and she's encrypted the feed. In other words, like layman's terms, this is gonna take a while.”   
I hear Rossi ask, “What are you doing?”   
“Making a deal.” I hear Spencer say. I freeze for a moment and close my eyes. I couldn’t think about what Spencer was about to do. I needed to crack this. I needed to help the team.   
After an hour, the team got back. Hotch came and got us from the liar. Penny and I sat down by the computers and Hotch was standing and Spencer was in front of us with a map. “This is Diane Turner's apartment. This is the nearest cell tower her phone call to me pinged off of, which means this is the circle that Maeve was telling me about.” Spencer tells us, circling around an area of the map.   
“What circle?” Hotch asks.   
“It was a clue in Diane's message. Finding her would be as easy as pie. Only she wasn't referring to the food, she was referring to... Pi.” Spencer explains, turning to us.   
“Why would Diane give you a clue?” I ask.   
“Maeve made a similar pun once. Now Diane wants me to see her the same way, but brilliant, the smartest girl in the room.” Spencer explains.   
“All right, assuming that Diane has a secondary location, where in the circle would she hold Maeve?” Hotch asks.   
“She'd need a building that would allow for privacy and control, a closed garage for prisoner transfer...” Spencer explains.   
“If she's copying Maeve's life, it might be someplace close to Maeve's apartment.” Hotch says. Penny and I get to work.   
“There's nothing in Diane's name.” I say.   
“Well, what about Maeve's name, or even Bobby's? Maybe she forged his signature.” Hotch asks.   
“Nope.” Penny says.   
“What about Diane's parents?” Spencer asks, coming over to us.   
“Yes. Yes. Diane rented a loft right next to Maeve's in her parents' name.” I tell them.   
“Reid.” Hotch calls Spencer over to the side and I turned and listened.   
They argue about Spencer going on the mission. “We know now that it's because she wants recognition, the type of recognition she thinks Maeve gets, and I can give her that.” Spencer tells Hotch.   
“How?” Hotch asks.   
“I’m going to tell her that I love her.” Spencer tells him. I frown and Spencer looks back at me.   
“Be ready in five.” Hotch tells Spencer.   
Spencer nods and walks over to me. “I’m going to be fine.” He tells me and smiles.   
“What if you aren’t?” I ask. “I’m always worried when you guys go out on a mission but you really could die in this one. She is crazy. She wants to take you away from Maeve. She could do that by killing you. Don’t go.”   
He smiles softly. “I have to.” He tells me.   
“I know.” I sigh and look down. “I had to try.” He hugs me and I hug back. “Come back to me.” I tell him softly. “And bring Maeve back too. I need to meet the girl who has made my best friend fall in love.”   
He pulls back and nods. “I will.” He smiles and goes out to the cars.   
“He’ll be back. I know it.” Penny says beside me. She places a hand on my should.   
I place my hand over hers and nod. “I know.”   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRRSRSRSRSRSR  
I was pacing back and forth in front of the elevators, waiting for the team. “Come sit down Winnie. Have some tea.”   
“No thanks.” I say softly and keep pacing. The elevator doors open and I stop. Spencer walks out and I run to him and hug him. “Oh thank god.” I say and close my eyes. He doesn’t hug back and I look up at him. He was crying. “What happened?” He shakes his head, gets out of my arms and moves to his desk. I watch him go and turn to the team. “What happened?”   
Rossi walks over to me as the team goes to their desks and offices. “Gattina. Maeve was shot by Diane. Diane shot herself and Maeve at the same time.” He explains to me.   
“What? No.” I say and look at Spencer. He was just sitting there looking at something on his desk. I knew it was the Arthur Conan Doyle book. “Oh God.” I say and start to walk over to him before I am stopped. I turn back to Rossi and frown. “He needs me.”   
“I’m going to drive him home. Why don’t you join us?” He offers. I nod. “No talking about what happened.” I nod at that too. We walk to Spencer’s desk. “Ready Reid?” Spencer nods and gets up and grabs the book and holds it to his chest. I grab my bag and follow the two men. Spencer gets in the back seat and I look at Rossi. He points to the back and I get it next to Spencer and look at him. He looked so sad and I just wanted to make him feel better. We get to his apartment and Rossi looks at Spencer in his mirror. “Want someone to come up with you?” Rossi asks. Spencer shakes his head. “Okay. Be safe.”   
“Bye Spencer.” I say softly. I watch Spencer go into his apartment and then I move to the front seat. “I wish I could do something.”   
“I know Gattina. I know.” He says as he moves down the street.


	7. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three chapters in one day!!! Wow.   
> Please reward me with a comment please and thank you

It had been two weeks since Rossi and I dropped off Spencer at his apartment and that was the last time I had seen him. It wasn’t because I wasn’t trying. Every day before work I would go and knock on his door with a coffee. He wouldn’t answer the door so I would leave it at his door. I would come back after work with dinner and a lunch for the next day and the coffee was never there. So either he was taking it after I left or one of his neighbors was. I would always knock on his door and make him knock back just to make sure he was still in there and he was still living. I am so worried about him and feel sad for his loss.   
I go up the stairs and see JJ standing by the door. “Hey.” I say to her.   
“Hey, what are you doing here?” She asks me.   
I hold up the coffee cup. “I always bring him his coffee.” I explain.   
“Does he answer?” She asks, getting a little hopeful.   
I frown and shake my head. “No. I just make him knock and tell him I am putting his coffee on this side of the door. It’s never here when I come back after work so I think he is taking it. Same with the food I leave him at night. Either he is taking it or one of his neighbors is. I hope it is him.”   
We hear footsteps and turn to the stairs. We see Penny come up with a basket. “Hey.” She says to us.”   
“Hey.” We say back.   
“Thought I’d check on Spence on my way into work.” JJ says.   
“Yeah. Me, too.” Penny says.   
“I’m here to bring his coffee.” I tell Penny.   
“Does he come out and get it.” Penny asks. I just shake my head.   
“Are these all from you?” JJ asks Penny about the baskets.   
“Maybe.” She says and smiles softly. She sets the basket down.   
“What’s in that one?” I ask, looking at it.   
“Mixed nuts and seeds. I'm trying to think of something that will help him feel better. So I went Reid-like and I did a bunch of research and it turns out that nuts and seeds have naturally occurring magnesium, and magnesium influences the production of serotonin, which is a happy happy joy joy chemical in the brain. I don't know.” Penny explains. Penny pushes the doorbell.   
“He won’t answer. I tried that the first week.” I tell her.   
“Spence, listen, if you're in there, we just want to know that you're all right.” JJ tells Spencer through the door.   
“Knock twice if you're conscious.” Penny tells him. After a second he knocks twice. “Is he ever gonna be okay?”  
“Eventually. And he knows we're all here for him, no matter what.” JJ yells through the door.   
“Yeah. What she said.” Penny says.   
“Come on.” JJ says and wraps an arm around Penny’s shoulders. She looks at me and opens her other arm.   
I smile and shake my head. “I’ll see you guys at work.”   
“Okay. See you soon.” Penny says and they walk down the stairs.   
I wait till I can’t hear them anymore. I walk over to the door and sit down in front of it. “I have your coffee Spencer. I know you take it every day. Can you just open the door slightly so I can actually give it to you?” I ask softly. I wait a minute. “Please Spencer. I need to know you can actually move and do things other than knock. And I want to know what you want for dinner and lunch. I don’t know your pallet and it would be good to know what you like so I know you are eating.”   
The door opens slightly and a hand comes out. I grin and hand him his coffee. “Thanks.” I hear him say softly. I could hear the sadness radiate from his voice. “That chicken salad was good.”   
“Oh okay good. I’ll bring some of that for dinner.” I say and nod. “Thank you Spencer.” I sigh and rest a hand on the door. “I miss you. The team misses you. We will always be here for you. Come to us when you are ready.”   
“Okay.” I hear and then the door closes.   
I sigh and get up. “Bye Spencer. I’ll be back later.” I tell him and then go to the office.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
The team was called to California to deal with a case of a couple murder cases. They were trying to figure out why the unsub was draining the blood of the victims. Penny called Morgan earlier to see if he had heard from Spencer. “Did Morgan get a hold of Spencer?” I ask Penny near the end of the night.   
“Yeah. Reid told him that the eyes sight might be a factor but once Morgan asked if he was okay, Reid shut down.” Penny explains. “Did you get anywhere this morning?”   
I thought about telling her the truth but then she would want to know what happened and it would only let her down to know nothing truly happened. “Nope.” I look at the time and notice that it was almost six. I stand up and stretch. “I’m going to get Spencer’s dinner and lunch for tomorrow. Do you want me to grab you something?”   
“Yeah. Anything vegetarian.” She tells me.   
I was getting my coat on when my phone rang. I look at Penny and frown. “Who was calling me?” She shrugs and I answer the phone. “Hello?”   
“Gwen. Are you still bringing me dinner?” I hear Spencer ask.   
“Of course. I was just leaving to pick it up.” I tell him.   
Penny looks at me and mouths ‘Reid?’ I nod and she grins.   
“Can you bring the case file with? I might know something but I need the files.” He asks.   
“Sure. I will bring those. Does this mean you will open the door this time?” I ask.   
“Just bring it please.” He requests and hangs up.   
I sigh and put my phone away. “I need a copy of the file.”   
“He wants the file?” She asks me.   
“Yeah. He wants me to bring it with his food.” I tell her and sit down.   
“Coming up.” She tells me and gets another file ready. She hands it to me and I put it in my bag.   
“Okay, I’ll be back with dinner.” I tell her and go get dinner. I make sure to grab a chicken salad for Spencer. I get to his apartment and knock on the door. After a minute of waiting I knock again. “I am not leaving this stuff at your door. If you want this file, then you have to let me see your face to make sure you are okay.”   
After another minute the door open and I finally see Spencer after two weeks. “Thank you.” He says softly.   
I hand him his food and the file. “How are you feeling?”   
“Better. Penelope gave me nuts, which has magnesium.” He tells me and looks at the floor.   
“Yeah she told us.” I tell him.   
“Thank you for all the dinners and lunches and coffee. They have been nice.” He tells me.   
I smile and shrug. “You would do the same thing if I was in your spot.” He nods. “Okay, well if you need anything else, just call.”   
“I will.” He tells me and shuts the door.  
I get back to the BAU and I go to the lair. Penny turns around when I open the door. “I got us Chinese. Tofu something for you.” I tell her and hand her the food. She puts it down and looks at me. “What?” I grab a fortune cookie and toss it to her. “There.”   
“Winnie!” She yells at me.   
“What?” I ask and laugh.   
“Is he okay?” She asks me and then her phone goes off. She groans and hits the answer button. “Yeah?”   
“I got news.” Morgan says.   
“What have you heard? Is he okay?” Penny asks fast.   
“Slow down. Slow down. Is Gwen there?” Morgan asks.   
“I’m here.” I say and sit down.   
“How does he look?” Morgan asks and Penny looks over at me.   
“Like he lost his love.” I tell them and Penny frowns.   
“Okay.” Morgan says and we hear a click. “Reid.”   
“Garcia, you should pull a list of all the art galleries in San Francisco.” Spencer says.   
Penny sits up and smiles. “Reid, I was just-- how are you?”  
“Better. Thanks for asking. And thanks for the baskets. You know, nuts have magnesium, which helps produce—“ Spencer starts saying. I smile at him. His voice was less sad.   
“Serotonin. Yeah. I know. Okay, galleries. I got a lot.” Penny says as she looks at the map.   
“Focus on the Mission District.” Spencer says and hangs up.   
“I guess that's better than nothing.” Morgan says.   
“It is. I will take it. Okay, there's still a few galleries, but it's more manageable. I am sending the addresses to your mobile.” Penny tells Morgan.   
“I got it. Thanks, Garcia.” Morgan says and hangs up.   
Penny looks over at me. “How did he really look?”   
“Like I said, like he lost his love. He is heartbroken.” I tell her and eat.   
“Have you really been over there every morning and night?” She asks me.   
“Have you really put ten baskets at his door?” I ask her.   
“Yeah.” She says and starts eating.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
The next day the phone rings and Penny answers it. “Hello my pretties.”   
“It’s me.” We hear Spencer say.   
We both sit up straight. He didn’t say he needed anything when I gave him his coffee this morning. “What’s up boy genius?”   
“I need a plane ticket to California to join the team. As soon as possible.” He tells us. Penny starts typing. “And Gwen?”   
“Yeah?” I saw.   
“Can you drive me?” He asks.   
“Of course.” I tell him.   
“Okay the plane is in two hours. I would head out now.” Penny tells us.   
“Okay, Spencer, I will be there in ten minutes.” I tell him, getting up and getting my coat on.   
“Okay. Thank you. Just text when you are here.” He tells me and hangs up.   
Penny looks at me and smiles. “Tell him I say hi.”   
“I will.” I tell her and run to my car. I drive to Spencer’s apartment and text him that I was there. He gets in two minutes later and I smile at him. “Penny says hi.”   
“I say hi back.” He tells me.   
I start driving to the airport. “You need to shave.” I tell him.   
“I will later.” He tells me. “Thank you.”   
“Don’t keep telling me thank you.” I tell him.   
“You were the only reason I was eating. I didn’t have the drive to get up and cook. You dropping off dinners and lunches were my only source of food. You help me so much when it didn’t benefit you.” He tells me. “That means a lot to me.”   
“Penny did the same thing. She brought those baskets.” I tell him.   
“She didn’t come over twice each day for two weeks though. You did.” He says.   
“I just want to help you.” I say softly.   
“Well it did.” He says and we fall in a nice silence.   
We get to the airport and he starts to get out. I place a hand on his arm and he looks back. “Text me when you land.” I tell him.   
He nods and leaves the car. I watch him walk in and I sigh. I drive back to the BAU and go to the lair. “He off?” Penny asks.   
“Yeah. I told him to text me when he lands. That won’t be for almost seven hours though.” I say and sit down.   
I guess I had fallen asleep because I was woken up a buzzing phone. “Hello?” I say, half a sleep.   
“Hey. I landed. Can I get the address of the team?” I hear Spencer ask.   
I sit up and rub my eyes. “Sure.” I say as I yawn.   
“Take a nap?” He asks.   
“More like I slept.” I tell him and go to my computer. “I just sent you the address.” I tell him.   
“Thank you.” He tells me.   
“Any time.” I say and hang up the phone. I walk over to Penny and sit by her. “How long was I out?” I ask her.   
“Almost seven hours.” She tells me and smiles. “He make it there in one piece?”   
“Yeah. I’m going to get coffee. Want any?” I ask her.   
“No. I’m good.” She says and I nod. I leave the lair and go get coffee. I come back and Penny was on the phone. “Reid, I’m happy to hear you made it safe and sound.”  
“Thank you, Garcia.” I hear Spencer say.   
“Okay, Christmas disease. It does not sound very jolly.” Penny said.   
“It was named after the first known case, Stephen Christmas.” I say as I sit down.   
“Yeah, that’s right.” Spencer says.   
“All right, I got 15 people who have trouble clotting.” Penny says.   
“He wouldn't stray too far from the art world.” JJ says.   
“Most likely works in and around the art community, but not as an artist.” Spencer adds in.   
“And he's a loner. So look for people with jobs where they don't interact with the public.” Hotch says.   
“Yeah. Yeah. I got 3. Stock boy at a local supermarket, an art blogger, and a custodian.” Penny says.   
“The victims have different blood types. If he's taking the plasma out of the blood, he must be a universal recipient.” Blake says. “Any of them with AB-positive blood?”   
“Specificity. I dig it. Okay, if I factor in those "B" names I was working on... And bingo is his name-o. Actually, his name is Bryan Hughes. He is an AB-positive hemophiliac who works as a janitor at the Bay Area Museum of Art, and before you ask, yes, his address has been sent to your phones.” Penny says and smiles at me.   
“You're the best, baby girl.” Morgan tells Penny and he hangs up.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
A couple hours we get a text from Hotch telling us that they solved the case and they were coming home.   
We wait the five hours for them to get back. I have coffee ready for all of them and we were sitting by the front doors. I see the elevator doors to open and I jump up. “Cool down Winnie.” Penny tells me. I nod and sit down. I see Spencer walk out by Morgan and I smile.   
“I have coffee.” I tell the team as they walk in. Blake, Rossi, and Hotch grab their coffee and go to their desks and offices.   
JJ, Morgan, and Spencer stay by us. “Thank you sweet stuff.” Morgan says to me.   
“Do you two want to help us with something?” JJ asks us.   
“All of you?” I ask, looking at Spencer.   
“All of us.” Spencer says with a slight smile.   
“Of course.” I tell him and return the smile.   
We all get into our cars and meet at Spencer’s apartment. We all walk in and I look around. I see book on the floor and I instantly get down and start picking them up. “Oh sweet books.” I whispers to them as I pick them up. “I won’t let anything hurt you.”   
I hear laughter behind me. I look back and see Morgan and JJ laughing. “Are you whispering to the books?” Morgan asks me.   
I pout and pet the book cover. “Of course. They are hurt right now. I have to make sure that they are calm before they get put back in the shelf.” I tell them seriously.   
JJ and Morgan look at each other and then at me. “You just hit a new level of crazy.” Morgan tells me.   
“I don’t care what you say. I care for books like they are my babies.” I say and go back to the books.   
I feel someone kneel down by me. I was ready for more laughter but when I look over, all I see is Spencer smiling softly. “Do they still love me?”   
“Yes. They understand what you were going through and will love you still.” I tell him. I smile and put the books in my arms on the shelf. I look at him. “Thanks.”   
He nods and we get to work putting Spencer’s apartment back in order. “How much take out did you order?” Morgan asks when he goes into the kitchen.   
I walk in and see most of the containers on the counter. “Gwen brought me food, so none.”   
Morgan looks at me. “You really did come here every night after work?”   
I look down. “And every morning with coffee.” I tell him. After a second of silence, I feel Morgan hug me. I was shocked to feel his arms around me. I’ve never hugged someone this muscular. “What is this for?”   
“You are just a great friend.” He tells me and backs up. “Thank you for taking care of my little brother.”   
I smile softly. “Any time.” I go back to picking up books.   
After an hour and half, Spencer’s apartment was back to normal and I look around. “There is so many books.” I say and smile.   
“If you want to barrow any, just let me know.” Spencer says.   
“Awesome.” I say and grin at him.   
JJ yawns. “We should get you girls home.” Morgan says.   
“Yeah. I have a boy at home that I am missing.” JJ says.   
“Tell Henry I said hi.” Spencer says.   
“Will do. You should come over for brunch on Saturday.” JJ offers.   
“Sounds like a plan.” He says and hugs her.   
We get our stuff on and start to head out. “Gwen, can you come here for one moment?” Spencer asks.   
I look at the other three. “I’ll be right out.” They head out and I go to Spencer. “What’s up?” He hugs me out of the blue. “Oh hello.” I say and hug him back. He backs away. “What was that for?”   
“Just a thank you for being a great friend.” He tells me.   
I smile and nod. “Okay, well see you later.” I tell him and go out to the car.   
“What did Spence want?” JJ asks as Morgan pulls onto the street.   
“Just wanted to thank me for being a good friend.” I tell her and look out the window.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay final chapter for the night.
> 
> I don't know how I like this chapter. It is 1:00 am right now so I'm not thinking straight. Tell me how you guys feel and if it doesn't feel right, tell me. I might redo this one.
> 
> I don't own Criminal Minds.

“Penny, where is JJ?” I ask Penny as I walk past her with flowers.   
“Oh I want flowers.” Penny wines.   
“Penny.” I say.   
“Oh yeah. JJ is at her desk.” She tells me and walks into the break room.   
“Thanks.” I say and walk past Blake and Strauss talking about something. I see Spencer and JJ talking, so I head over there. “Look what I have.”   
“Who gave you those?” JJ asks.   
“Oh they aren’t for me.” I say and laugh. “Me get flower.” I set down the flowers and laugh harder. I stop slowly and wipe the tears that added in my eyes. “That was a great joke JJ.”   
Spencer and JJ look at each other and frown. “Why don’t you think you would never get flowers?” JJ asks.   
“Because I’m me.” I say and roll my eyes. “These are for you JJ.”   
“Me? Who are they from?” She asks.   
“I was thinking your husband?” I say.   
“Will isn’t a flower person.” JJ says and takes the card. She opens it and frowns. “Zugzwang.”   
“What? Let me see that.” Spencer says and takes the card.   
I frown. “But that is what Diane said to you…”   
“Before she killed Maeve.” He says and frowns.   
“But she is dead…” I say.   
“So who sent it?” JJ asks.   
“No idea.” Spencer says and looks at me.   
“Wait… didn’t you say the voice on the other end of the payphone was computer generated?” JJ asks.   
“That means it could be from anybody.” I say.   
“That means that it might not have to do anything with Maeve.” Spencer says.   
“Whoever it was knew that you would be at that phone booth. Which means they were stalking you.” JJ says.   
“Or us.” Spencer says.   
“What if it this is the Replicator?” I ask.   
The team meets up in the round table room and Strauss comes in. “I just came from the Director's office. He doesn't like the idea that his agents are being taunted and he wants me to keep him personally in the loop. Catch me up, please.”  
“Okay, so, uh, the flowers cleared all of our security checkpoints. Which means there's no explosives, no chemical residue. Nothing. They were ordered from a local florist-- Wendy's Bloomers. I checked Wendy, her bloomers, the employees, the delivery service. They all came out clean. I managed to track down the credit card. It's a stolen card number, and it was ordered from a prepaid cell phone in Philadelphia.” Penny tells us.  
“But it's all about the message he's trying to send.” Blake says.   
“But they were sent to JJ. Why her?” Morgan asks.   
“Yeah, the original zugzwang taunt was directed at me.” Spencer says.   
“If it's directed at one of us, it's directed at all of us.” Rossi says.  
“It's only a matter of time before his taunts turn to threats.” Morgan says.   
“I'm posting security details at each of our homes.” Hotch tells us.   
“Well, he's communicating directly. What exactly is he trying to say?” Blake asks.   
“That the game has changed. First he was chasing us, copying the cases that we'd solved, and now it's our turn to chase him.” Hotch explains.   
“Tag, we're it.” I say.   
“What do we know about the Replicator?” Strauss asks.   
“So far he's committed 3 murders in 3 different states.” Hotch tells her.   
“I’ll handle this part Penny.” I say and take the remote. “The first was Maxwell Holmes, 28-year-old contractor, husband, and father of two, from Dallas. He was found with his mouth sewn shut 4 weeks after we closed the Silencer case. Next is an unidentified John Doe. He was found in New Mexico near the Mexican border.” I tell them as I move the pictures on the screen.   
“His leg was severed and someone else's was transplanted on.” JJ says.   
“Do we have any idea where the limb comes from?” Strauss asks.   
“None.” Morgan says.   
“Finally, Megan Lewinbuck, 31-year-old paralegal, single mother. She was found in Phoenix. She was found last week. All her joints were dislocated and she'd been turned into a human marionette. And that's everything so far.” I finish up.   
“Local police and Bureau field offices are going to keep us apprised of any developments.” Hotch tells her.   
“I want this case closed quickly. Copycat murders, flowers sent. I see this as an assault on the entire Bureau.” Strauss tells us.   
“Uh, sir, Philadelphia P. D. just uploaded a homicide to ViCAP. An unidentified woman was found this morning exsanguinated with her eyelids removed.” Penny tells us.   
“It's just like our blood artist Bryan Hughes.” Morgan says, looking at Penny’s computer.   
“Philadelphia, the same city the flowers were ordered from.” Spencer says.   
“Jet's standing by. Wheels up in 20.” Hotch says and gets up. He starts to leave and I run after him.   
“Sir.” I say as I run after him. He stops and turns around. “I was wondering if you put any more thought in me coming to the field. As you know, I do have a degree in forensics and I want to help. I need to help.”   
He frowns. “Not this case England.”   
“Please sir. I won’t go in any buildings or go anywhere without someone. Please give me a change. I have studied this case. I think I could help.” I beg.   
He sighs. “You don’t get a gun and you have to stay at the station for the arrest.” He tells me. I grin and clap. “Do have a to go bag?” I nod and grin even more. He sighs and nods. “See you on the jet.” He tells me and goes into his office.   
I grin and dance around. “What are you doing?” I hear behind me.   
I turn around and see the team smiling. “I’m dancing.” I tell them and grin. “Guess who is coming to the field with you guys?”   
“You?” Spencer asks.   
“Yes me.” I grin. “I’ve been talking to Hotch. I have two degrees. One in computers and one in forensics. I don’t want to just sit in the lair while you guys go out. I want to help in more than one way.”   
“This is great.” Morgan says. He claps his hand on my shoulder as he passes.   
JJ and Blake smile at me as they pass. “I know you will be great Gattina.” Rossi says and smiles. He goes into his office.   
I see Penny frowning. “You’re leaving me?”   
“Not forever Penny. I just feel like I can help more out on the field. You have taught me so much Penny and I want to be useful in many areas.” I tell her. “Please don’t be sad.”   
“I’m not sad. I’m worried.” She tells me and walks up to me. “Now I have another family member I have to worry about every mission.”   
“I’ll be safe. I can’t even go with them to the arrest.” I tell her.   
“Okay, well I know you will be great.” She tells me and goes to the lair.  
I look at Spencer. “I don’t want you to come.” He tells me.   
I cross my arms. “And why not?” I ask.   
“You could get hurt.” He says and walks to me. “I can’t have you get hurt.”   
“I’ll be fine. I promise.” I smile and walk to get my bag.   
I get on the jet and grin. “I can’t believe I’m on the jet.” I say softly.   
“Don’t look too happy.” I hear behind me. I turn around and see Rossi smiling at me. “We are going to look at dead bodies.”   
I grin even more. “I know.”   
“You are a strange one.” He says and laughs. We take our seats and get in the air.   
We look at the files and get comfy. “The Replicator sent those flowers today knowing that that body would be discovered.” JJ says.   
“And he's taken the time to track our cases.” Blake says.   
“It's not too much trouble to track news headlines with a Google search.” Morgan tells her.   
“Yeah, but the original zugzwang message was delivered to me at a phone booth, which means he's not just tracking our cases, he's tracking everything we do.” Spencer says.   
“Why would someone do that?” I ask.   
“We've been taunted before. Guys like Randall Garner. Usually malignant narcissists who feel the need to show off.” Rossi informs us.   
“So maybe he wants us to see how smart he is.” Morgan suggests.   
“But why? What's the point? Is it a warning? Is he mocking us?” Blake asks.   
“Maybe all of the above.” Morgan says.   
“He's not attempting to hide his kills, so it's probably his way of bragging.” Rossi says.   
“He's probably trying to lure us out. He certainly wants our attention.” Hotch says.   
“We have a total of 4 copycat murders and no apparent connection between the victims.” Spencer says.   
“My guess is they're all targets of opportunity. Who he kills doesn't matter. The point is to get to us.” Rossi tells us.   
“The latest victim was in Philadelphia. Bryan Hughes bled his victims in San Francisco.” Blake points out.   
“All the other copycat murders occurred in the same area as the original kills. Why is this one different?” Morgan asks.   
“It's his game. He can change the rules anytime he wants.” Rossi informs us.   
“All that traveling-- clearly he's got the money and the time.” JJ says.   
“And patience. His organization and attention to detail suggests some sort of bigger plan.” Hotch tells us.   
“Greetings, crime-fighters.” Penny says as she pops up on a screen. “We just got an I. D. On the first exsanguinated, eyelidless body. Her name is Molly Patton, 27. She was a nurse at a local hospital.” Penny tells us.   
“Penny, what do you mean by first?” I ask.   
“I mean that a second exsanguinated, eyelidless body was just discovered.” Penny tells us.   
“He's moving fast.” Rossi says.   
Hotch gives out orders of where to go. He looks at me and I grin. “England. Go with JJ, Morgan, and Spencer. Let’s see what you have.”   
We land and go to the newest crime scene. I let the others handle the police and the questions. I rush ahead and examine the body. This was so interesting. “Any clues?” Morgan asks me.   
“I mean she needs to go to the ME but the cuts here on her eyes are very clean. He had a very steady hand.” I tell them.   
We get to the police station and Rossi and Hotch go into an office. We sit down and wait. “So this is how it goes?”   
“A lot of the time yes. We wait for the killer to make a mistake sometimes. We just have to figure it out.” Spencer tells me. I nod and watch Rossi and Hotch leave.   
They come back an hour later and hand us a photo of Hotch with some blood on it. “It was found on our newest body.” Hotch tells us.   
I sit down and look at some of the victim photos. Hotch and Rossi go down to the ME and the others talk about the photo. I feel someone sit down next to me. “You are going to burn a hole into the photo.” I hear JJ tell me.   
I look over and smile. “I’m just trying to see if I can see something that we missed.”   
“Got it. You don’t have to prove that you are right for this team. We already know you are.” JJ tells me.   
I sigh. “I just want to prove that I can do this job.” I tell her. “I want to be good enough.”   
“Hey Gwen. About what you said-“ JJ starts.   
“Video confrience now.” Hotch tells us as he walks into a meeting room.   
We get up and follow him. We all take our place and Strauss starts talking.   
“This psychopath’s message is clearly personal and it’s making us look bad. Someone profiling our profilers undermines the efficacy of everything you do, and I'm going to be frank with you-- both the Director and the Attorney General want to take you off this case, and I can't say I totally disagree.” Strauss tells us.   
“Why?” Rossi asks, getting upset.   
“Because your victims now, and I'm concerned your ability to investigate may be compromised.” Strauss tells him.   
“Yeah, well, I assure you our abilities are just fine.” Rossi argues with her.   
“Is that true, Aaron?” Strauss asks Hotch.   
“Yes, it is, ma'am, absolutely.” Hotch says.   
“We know this case better than anyone.” Rossi tells Strauss.   
“All right. Well, I'll tell the Director if he takes you off the case, it's either with my resignation or over my dead body.” Strauss says.   
“Ma'am, we're starting the briefing now.” We hear someone say off the screen.   
“I'll be right there.” She tells the person and then looks at us. “You catch this son of a bitch, Aaron.”   
“Understood.” Hotch tells her and the screen goes back to the front screen.   
“Do you really think they'd replace us?” JJ asks, looking around the table.   
“Sounds like you'd have to kill Strauss first, and I doubt if that's as easy as it sounds.” Rossi says.   
“All right, so what do we know?” Hotch asks.   
“This photo isn't digital. It was printed on real chromogenic photo paper.” Spencer tells him.   
“So he's old school.” I add in.   
“We're still trying to ascertain when the photo was taken.” JJ tells him.   
Hotch’s phone rings and he gets it out. “Garcia, I'm putting you on speaker.”   
“You guys, there are a shocking number of weirdoes out there who have a thing for nurses. But I got a gigantenormous hit. 15 years ago, the BAU had a case in Pittsburgh involving the stabbing murders of 4 nurses.” Penny informs us.   
“Pittsburgh? That's close enough to be related.” JJ tells us.   
“That rings a bell. But I didn't work that case, Gideon did.” Rossi tells us.   
“Yeah, yeah. It ended relatively well. The killer Jack Lee Kemper was caught, and we managed to save one of his would-be victims.” Penny says.   
“Garcia, what happened to Kemper?” Morgan asks.   
“He died 5 months ago from lethal injection.” Penny tells us.   
“What if that was the trigger? The Silencer copycat murder happened about 5 months ago.” Spencer says.   
Hotch hangs up and we get up and go to the main area in the station. All the cops round up. “We believe we're looking for a white male in his mid-40s or possibly even 50s.” Hotch starts off.   
“He's criminally and forensically sophisticated, so he may be an ex-con or have law enforcement training.” Rossi says.   
“You saying he could be a cop?” The chief asks us.   
“It's unlikely, but we can't rule it out.” JJ tells him.   
“This unsub is using his victims as a device with which to antagonize the FBI, the BAU in particular.” Spencer tells the officers.   
“So he's after you.” One of the officers say.   
“He's been copycatting murder cases that we've closed all over the country.” Spencer answers him.   
“We do have reason to believe that he's been stalking each member of this team.” Morgan says.   
“So he's extremely mobile and has the time and the means with which to get around.” Blake tells them.   
“And the intelligence to cover his tracks and remain evasive.” Morgan adds on.   
“We think it all started 15 years ago with a case we had in Pittsburgh that involved the death of 4 nurses.” Rossi says.   
“That killer, Jack Lee Kemper, was apprehended, and he was recently executed.” Hotch continues.   
“Because the most recent exsanguination victims were also nurses, we believe this case holds some kind of special meaning to him.” Spencer says.   
“So we should be looking at Kemper's family, friends, and associates.” JJ says.   
“They may be trying to avenge his death, or they might be convinced that he was wrongfully accused.” Blake continues.   
“We should also look at friend and relatives of the victims. They may blame us for not solving the case fast enough.” Morgan adds.   
“This unsub is intelligent and highly organized, but he's also hellbent on revenge.” Rossi says.   
“Which makes him especially dangerous. Thank you.” Hotch ends the meeting and we go in a seprate way.   
“How was your first profile meeting?” Spencer asks me.   
“It was different. I’m going to look into the family and friends of the killer and victims.” I tell him and go to one of the computers.   
After a little I bring files of everyone I could find to our meeting room and set them down. “I found nothing.” I tell them and sit down.   
The rest of the team talks and starts thinking but I close my eyes. I don’t know if I was right for this. I was getting so tired.   
“That’s it.” I hear Rossi. I get up and go by the team.   
“What?” JJ asks.   
“Bidwell. Donnie Bidwell. Of course. He was the primary suspect before we caught Kemper. We had a strong circumstantial case, but DNA eventually cleared him. His name got leaked to the press the second we grabbed him.” Rossi explains to us.   
“Why so fast?” JJ asks.   
“We thought it was probably someone in the local P.D.” Rossi says.   
“How long did we hold him for?” Spencer asks.   
“Couple of weeks.” Rossi says.   
“England. I want you to be our tech person on the field.” Hotch tells me.   
“Why not call Penny?” I ask as I sit at the computer and get into our system.   
“I want to see how much you have learned.” He tells me.   
“Okay what do you want to know?” I ask, hands at the ready.   
“Everything on this Donnie Bidwell.” Hotch tells me.   
“Okay, he was picked up for assault and lewd behavior. He did some time and probation. He just got divorced and has two daughters but their mom got custody. He cannot hold down a job. He has had twelve in the last ten years. He has been at a lot of different jobs, from a fry cook to a used car salesman.” I tell them.   
“He was in construction before that right?” Rossi asks.   
“Yup. He owned a hot mop shower, pan company. But it went south after the arrest.” I tell them. “His legal fees wiped him out, and then a year later he had a nervous breakdown.”   
“No wonder he wants payback.” Blake says.   
“Address England?” Hotch asks.   
“Sent already sir.” I tell him, looking up and smiling. “Work and home.”   
“We better make sure we get this right before we arrest this guy again.” JJ says.   
“Rossi, Blake, and Reid take the work. The rest of us will take the house.” Hotch tells us. I start to get up. “Where are you going England?”   
“To the house?” I ask.   
“You aren’t going to the arrests remember?” Hotch asks and I sit back down. “You aren’t an agent.”   
“I know.” I tell him. Spencer looks back as he leaves and smiles softly.   
I call Penny. “I’m you in the field.” I tell her when she picks up.   
“What?” She asks.   
“I haven’t helped and I can’t go with them for the fun part. I just did what you do but I’m here and not there.” I tell her.   
“So you are taking my job and are in the field?” She asks.   
“Maybe I should have just stayed back there. I’m no help.” I say.   
“I bet you will be help at one point.” Penny says.   
“Thanks.” I tell her and hang up. The team gets back and puts a man into a cell.   
Spencer walks over and smiles. “They got the guy.”   
“Awesome. What now?” I ask.   
Hotch walks over to me. “I want you to watch the integration.” He tells me.   
I nod. “Okay sounds good.”   
I go to the watching room and watch with JJ, Blake, and Morgan. “So he is trying to get some sympathy right?”   
“Yes.” Morgan tells me.   
Rossi walks out and frowns. “Something's not right. This is his crowning moment. All that work he did to replicate those murders. He should be singing like a canary.”   
“Mm-hmm. Especially if he's a narcissist.” Blake says.   
“I want to try something.” JJ says and looks at me. “Come in there with me.”   
“Me? I don’t know how to integrate.” I say, looking at the others.   
“I don’t want you to integrate.” JJ tells me.   
“Okay.” I say and follow her into the room.   
We sit down. “Hello Donnie. You know me, but this is my associate Agent England.” She says and smiles at him. “Sure you don’t want to take your meds? Go ahead.” She tells him.   
He nods and takes them.   
“You know, I was reading through your file, and I saw that you had two kids. Girls, right?” JJ asks.   
I pull up a photo on my tablet. “Sophie and Laura?” I ask.   
“Lauren.” He corrects me.   
“Right.” I place the tablet on the table to show him a photo of his ex-wife and his two girls. “They’re beautiful.”   
“I have a little boy.” JJ tells him. “And I don’t know what I'd do if someone took him from me. I know your girls are older now, but think about how hard this is gonna be for them. If you cooperate with us, you can make things much easier for everyone.”   
The man looks down and sighs. He starts talking about what happened with his ex-wife and his kids.   
“That sounds terrible.” I tell him.   
“One day I just came home from work and they were gone. Poof.” He says.   
“Did your wife ever say anything about leaving?” I ask. “Not a word. She just packed up the girls and left. They're my kids. My kids. They were so little then. They didn't understand.” He says.   
“It's hard.” I tell him. I could understand having someone in your life one day and not in the next.   
“Hard? Hard? You ruined my life. I was arrested for no reason. I was publicly humiliated. My face smeared all over the news. They treated me like garbage. I was behind bars for weeks. I was innocent. But people's lives stink so bad that they just love when they can watch somebody else take a fall. It's like a car wreck. They can't take their eyes off of it. All I could do was suck on it. No, no, no-- that wasn't me. 15 years. 15 years and not a peep from the FBI. No letter, no email, no "sorry we turned your life upside down, Donnie." Nothing!” He says, getting angrier by the second.   
“Well, it must feel real good to release it after all these years.” JJ says.   
“You're damn right. Those nurses that I bled out, this time they're your fault. You people made me into this.” Donnie says and smiles.   
“Alright, so that is why you followed us across the country and copycatted these? You wanted us to look as bad as you did. I mean, it's just an awful lot of work, Donnie. We have New Mexico, uh, Dallas, D. C.” JJ says as she lays out photos.   
“What are those? What are you talking about?” Donnie asks. He looked confused.   
“We found your photo collection, the one hidden under your bed. And your victims' eyelids, too.” JJ tells him.   
“What?” He asks, looking a little grossed out.   
“Just cooperate with us, Donnie, tell us everything, and give yourself a chance to see your girls again.” I try to reason with him.   
“I want my lawyer. I have a phone call. I get a phone call.” He says and looks down.   
“Okay.” JJ says. We get up and go out of the room. “That doesn’t make sense. He just admitted to killing the nurses, and the second I bring up the copycat murders, he lawyers up.”   
“He looked as if this was all news to him. Check him out. He's a bundle of nerves.” Rossi says.   
“It could all be an act. He might still be trying to manipulate us.” Blake says.   
“I really don’t think so. He got scared and grossed out from the photos.” I tell her.   
“Well, if he is gonna lawyer up, that's a privileged conversation.” Morgan says.   
Rossi sighs. “Come on, I'll buy us a cup of coffee.” He says and we go to the break room. He looks at me while we walk. “You did good for your first time in there Gattina.”   
“I didn’t do much.” I say and shrug.   
“You did what you needed to do.” He says goes to the side.   
“He probably wasn't expecting to get caught so soon.” Morgan suggests.   
“So maybe we threw a wrench in his master plan.” JJ says.   
Blake sighs. “Which is what?”   
One of the police officer comes in. “We got a problem. It's Bidwell.”   
We all rush to the integration room and see Bidwell shaking on the floor with another police officer.   
“He was only alone for a second.” Morgan says.   
“He took them all.” Rossi says, holding the empty bottle of his pills.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
We all meet up in our meeting room. I go to the couches and closes my eyes. I was trying to figure this problem out. They call Penny and try to figure out where he called his partner. She calls back a little later. “Ok. I checked the incoming phone records and there was a call that caught my eye, 'cause for the last 6 months, that call came in at the same time at the same day, except for once. It's from an unknown phone number, so I did what I do and I made the number known, and it was from a prepaid cell phone. Here's the kicker. Oh, get ready. It was paid for with the same stolen credit card used to buy JJ's flowers. What? Bam” She says.   
“Can you triangulate the number?” Spencer asks her.   
“Why ask me that question? Triangulation is just about my favorite thing to do. That phone is in Pittsburgh.” She tells us.   
“That's a 5-hour drive.” Morgan says.   
“Or about 45 minutes on the jet.” Hotch says and gets up. “England, you are coming with.”   
I get up and smile. We all get on the jet and Hotch calls Strauss. “Yes, ma'am. SWAT is meeting us on the ground. All right, I will keep you posted. Thank you.” He hangs up the phone and looks at us. “Strauss isn't altogether comfortable with us going on this takedown, but I told her that Pittsburgh P. D. would take the lead.”   
“You know, if the Replicator used Bidwell, then somehow he had to convince him to exsanguinate those women.” Rossi says.   
“And cut off their eyelids. Bidwell was broken and vulnerable.” Blake says.   
“He was ripe for a manipulation. The Replicator must have counted on that.” Morgan continues.   
“That's probably why he chose Bidwell in the first place. Well, he must be on persuasive guy. Persuasive enough to turn Bidwell into a killer.” Blake says.   
We land and get into cars. “Talk to me, mama.” Morgan says on speaker with Penny.   
“You're on the right track. That phone hasn't been used and hasn't moved. Make the next left.” Penny says.   
“I got it. Guys, I don't like this. It feels like we're going exactly where he wants us to.” Morgan says and we all look at each other.   
We get there and we all put on vests. “England, you stay out here.”   
“Where I would be alone. No way.” I say. “I have to go in.”   
He groans and nods. “Stay right by two members of the team.” He says and hands me one of his guns. “Don’t use it unless you have to.”   
We get inside and get to a door. The swat team looks inside the room. “It’s clear.”   
We all enter the room and the team clears the room, but I wasn’t focusing on them. All around the room were pictures of the team. There was a girl in the middle on some mattress. I look around and see photos of me. I cross my arms and move closer to Spencer.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Criminal Minds.   
> Okay my readers, if I have any, this chapter is going to have some things happen at the end, but don't worry. This is a Spencer/OC story. I promise.

We went back to the BAU after getting the evidence bagged up. When we landed, I went straight to the lair. I knew Penny would be waiting for the team by the offices so I would be alone. I sit on the couch we have in there and bring my knees to my chest. I wasn’t ready for the field. I wasn’t needed on the field. The door and Rossi walks in. “Need company?” He asks.   
“Always.” I tell him.   
He shuts the door and sits next to me. He puts his arms around me and I lean into him, closing my eyes as I do so. “What’s wrong, Gattina?” He asks softly.   
“I wasn’t ready or needed out there.” I say softly.   
“You are always needed.” He tells me and rubs my back.   
“I didn’t help. The only thing I did was the one thing I do here.” I tell him.   
“Not every case needs everything.” He tells me.   
“The cases always need the others. JJ is great with the families, Spencer knows everything, Hotch is the leader, Morgan can catch everyone, and you are the face of the BAU. You know everything there is to know about this division.” I tell him.   
“What about Blake?” He asks.   
“She also know everything and she is great with talking with people.” I say.   
“Well, I can tell you that you did a good job in the integration.” He says.   
“I didn’t do anything.” I say softly.   
“You were connecting to him.” He says. “You know how it feels to be left and forgotten. Do you know how many unsubs also feel that way? I’m not Reid so I don’t know the exact number, but it’s a lot. That is how you help. You are one of the only people who know how that feels and you can use that to connect with the unsubs. You can help the team Gattina.”   
We hear a knock on the door and Rossi gets up and opens the door. “Hey, can I come in?” I hear JJ ask. Rossi looks at me and I nod. He lets her in and shuts the door. JJ sits on the side of me and Rossi comes back and wraps his arms around me again. “You did good today.” She tells me.   
“See Gattina.” Rossi says.   
“Hotch probably doesn’t think so.” I say.   
“I don’t think so.” JJ says. “I think he thinks you did fine for your first mission.”   
“I don’t think I’ll be going out on the field again anytime soon.” I say.   
“Maybe not, but you have the eye for the field. I have a suggestion.” Rossi says and I look at him. “Get your training and become a special agent. That way when your internship end you are a great asset to the team, not that you aren’t already, but Strauss will agree to keep you here if you can be on the field or work with computers.”   
I nod. “Maybe I should.” I say.   
“Rossi, can Gwen and I have a minute? We will be out soon.” JJ asks.   
“Sure.” Rossi says. He stands up and pats my head. “Feel better Gattina.” He says and leaves.   
I look at JJ. “What do you want to talk about?” I ask.   
“Why don’t you think someone would send you flowers?” JJ asks. I sigh and close my eyes. I was hoping that she was going to forget about what happened to start this case. “And don’t say that it is because you are you because I don’t know what you mean by that.”   
I sigh and look at my hands. “I’m not the type of girl that people want to do things for. I’m not a size two like you or Blake are. I’m not the most amazing person like Penny is. I’m plain and big. When we go out, men always look at you three while I am just the girl no one looks at.” I tell her as I look at her. “I’ve always know that I’m unwanted. I mean what guy wants a girl her parents didn’t even want. I’ve accepted the way my life is going to go. I’m the friend but never the girl who boys want to date.”   
“Gwen…” JJ starts to say before the door is opened.   
Penny sticks her head in and smiles. “Hotch wants to see Winnie.”   
I nod and stand up. “Thanks for the talk JJ.” I tell JJ and go to Hotch’s office. I knock and hear a ‘come in’. I go in and see Hotch and Rossi talking. “Penny said you wanted to see me?”  
“Sit down Gwen.” Hotch tells me. I sit down, getting flashbacks of going to the principal’s office as a child. “You did okay for your first mission but I can’t have you come out on another one.” Hotch tells me. I nod and look down. “Until you get training.” He continues.   
I look up, shocked. “You want me to get training so I can come out on the field again?” I ask.   
“Yes. I see a talent in you and I think it will benefit the team.” Hotch tells me. “With the training, you can become a great agent. You have to do this on your own time so you can still help with cases.”   
“I’m fine with that.” I tell him. “I won’t let you down.”   
“I know you won’t.” He says.   
“You have to pass a test first, so if you want to come with me, I have some books that you can study and get ready for it.” Rossi says and stands up.   
“Okay.” I say and stand up. I look at Hotch and grin. “Thank you, sir.”   
“You’re welcome Gwen. Make me proud.” He says. Rossi and I go into his office and he helps me get all the books I would have to study.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
For the next weeks, the team was trying to figure out who the replicator was. While they were doing that, I was sitting on the couch reading the books Rossi gave me. I would listen to the team as they talked and add my thoughts when I had some or they asked what I thought, but for the most part I was a supporting character to their mission. I knew I could be more help once I passed my test.   
“but he was still back in DC to see me hit my game winning home run against the secret service.” I hear Spencer say.   
“Just be glad someone got a photo of it.” I tell him, sitting up. “Now you actually have proof it happened.” I smirk at him.   
“Oh, she got you pretty boy.” Morgan says and ruffles his hair.   
Spencer looks at me and playful glares at me. “Get back to reading Gwen.” He tells me. I stick my tongue out at him and he laughs. “Mature.”   
I go back to my book and after a couple minutes, it is taken out of my hands. “Hey!” I yell. I look up and see Penny holding my book.   
“We get to go home.” She tells me, handing my book back.  
“Really?” I ask, taking the book and putting it in my bag. I grab my coat and we leave the room.   
“I have a favor to ask Winnie.” She says as we walk to the elevators.   
“Sure what is it?” I ask as I push the button.   
“Come get coffee with me tomorrow.” She says.   
“That’s it? Oh course I’ll get coffee with you.” I tell her.   
“Okay there is one more part to the event.” She says. “Do you remember Kevin from the bus case?” She asks.   
“Yeah?” I ask, not seeing where she was heading.   
“He wanted to get coffee. I use to date him and he wants to get back together.” She explains.   
“And you don’t.” I fill in.   
“I need you to be a buffer.” Penny says.   
“So I’m ruining what he thinks is a coffee date?” I ask, trying to understand what I was going to be doing.   
“Yes.” She says, looking hopeful.   
“Okay.” I say and shrug.   
The doors open and we walk in. “Angel, you’ve got wings baby.” She tells me as Morgan walks in.   
“What are you doing to save my baby girl?” Morgan asks.   
“I’m crashing her coffee date with Kevin.” I tell him.   
“Ah. He is still trying?” Morgan asks Penny.   
“Yeah and I just can’t say no.” Penny says. “I hate making people sad.”   
“Pick me up in the morning?” I ask Penny as the doors open.   
“Sure. Bye guys.” She says to us and goes to her car.   
“You are a good friend sweet thing.” Morgan tells me.   
I shrug. “Kevin seemed nice when I met him. Shouldn’t be too bad.” I say. “Bye Morgan.” I say and go to my car.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
Penny picks me up the next morning and I get in the car and groan. “It’s too early.” I say and close my eyes.   
“You need coffee.” She says.   
“I need coffee.” I agree with her and look at her. “Too early.”   
She just laughs and drives to the coffee shop. When we get there, I see Kevin waiting outside for us. We get out and walk over to him. “Hiya Kevin. You remember Gwen.” Penny says when Kevin notices us.   
“Oh, yeah.” Kevin says and look at Penny.   
“Hey.” I say and smile.   
Kevin moves closer to Penny. “I thought we were getting coffee… alone.” He tries to whisper quietly but I still heard him.   
“You were, but I need my coffee in the morning so I asked Penny if I could tag along.” I say and grin. He looks down, blushing. He was probably embarrassed that I heard him. “You don’t mind do you?”   
“Of course not.” He says with a frown.   
“Oh goodie.” I say and move my arm into the crook of his arm. “Buy me a coffee?”   
“Um sure.” He says, flustered.   
I lead him inside and look back and wink at Penny. I hear her laugh and follow us. Penny and I order our coffees and we all go sit down. “So Kevin. You work at the FBI doing what Penny and I do but in a different department, right?” I ask.   
“Yeah. You are the BAU’s intern right?” He asks.   
“I am. I’m also training to be a special agent too.” I tell him.   
Our coffee orders come up and Penny offers to get them. She gets up and I look at Kevin. “She doesn’t want me anymore, does she?” He asks with a frown.   
“I’m not sure. All I know is that she asked me to tag along so I would say no.” I say softly. I lay a hand on his arm. “I’m sorry Kevin. I understand how you are feeling.”   
“Thanks Gwen. I’m glad she brought you.” He tells me and looks up. “Who is that?” He asks and rushes off.   
“Who is who?” I ask and turn around. I see Penny talking to a hot guy. “Oh no.” I grab my stuff and go after Kevin.   
“Two months strong?” Kevin was saying in a panic voice.   
“Kevin come with me.” I say and pull him out of the shop. I look at him. “You can’t get jealous.”   
“And why not?” He asks, getting angry.   
“She’s not your girlfriend.” I tell him simply. I see him deflate and frown. “She will just get mad if you get jealous.”   
“She plays the ukulele. Did you know that?” He asks.   
“Nope.” I tell him. “I didn’t.”   
“Thank you for stopping me in there. I could have made a bigger fool of myself if you didn’t.” He tells me.   
“I’ve been there. I wish someone would have removed me from the situation.” I tell him.   
Penny comes out and hands me my coffee. “I’m sorry Penelope.” Kevin says.   
“You know I don’t have to meet you here for coffee? I don’t even have to talk to you.” Penny says.   
“Penny, we need to get to work.” I remind her.   
She nods and sighs. “You don’t have the right to be jealous.” Penny says. “Need a ride?”   
“Yes please.” He says and we all head to work.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
The team gets sent to Minnesota to deal with a case where the killer was stabbing women and stealing their tongue. “Thank you for this morning.” Penny says as we get to the lair.  
“No problem. Kevin is a nice person.” I say and set up.   
“He is a great person.” She says and sighs.   
“Why did you break up?” I ask.   
“He wanted to get married and I didn’t.” She tells me.   
“Oh wow.” I say and look at her. “So you were together for a long time.”   
“Yeah, but I’m over him. He got with a number of girls after we broke up.” She says.   
“Maybe rebounds?” I suggest. “I mean he did have the most amazing person and she broke up with him.”   
“You’re sweet.” She says and smiles. “Kevin is just not for me. But if you like him…” She suggests.   
“What?” I say surprised. This went a way I didn’t think it was going. I hadn’t even thought of another guy since Spencer. I mean I knew I wouldn’t get Spencer, even after he finishes grieves, which won’t be for a while.   
“I wouldn’t be upset if you wanted to pursue him.” She tells me.   
“I just formally met him today, Penny.” I say.   
“That didn’t stop you from liking Spencer.” She says.   
“And look how well that turned out.” I say with a frown. “I’m not dating right now.” I say and start to work.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
I was getting coffee later that day when I feel someone walking behind me. I stop what I am doing and grab my spoon. “Hey.” I hear and I scream, slapping who ever talked to me. I look at Kevin, who was the person behind me and see a red mark appearing on his face.   
“Oh my god. I am so sorry Kevin.” I say and grab a cold wet rag. “I’m still on edge from when I went into the field. I’ve been extra careful and look where it got me.” I say and place the rag on the hand mark.   
He laughs and shakes his head softly. “It’s all good. I did sneak up on you.” He says and takes the rag out of my hand and holds it on his face.   
“Still sorry. Do you want me to make you a coffee or tea to make up for it?” I ask.   
“No. I just came over here to talk to you.” He says and leans against the counter.   
“Me? Why? I don’t think I can help you anymore with Penny. She told me she isn’t right for you.” I tell him.   
“Very blunt.” He says.   
“Oh that was rude. Sorry. Again.” I say and frown. “I’m not being that nice to you am I?”   
“It’s fine Wendy.” He says with a smile.   
“Wendy?” I ask, going back to my coffee.   
“Well no calls you Gwendolyn and I thought Wendy was a nice nickname for you. I could totally see you be a Wendy.” He tells me.   
“Okay.” I say. I was use to people calling me all different types of names. It comes with the territory of long names. “No one wants to spend the time saying Gwendolyn.”   
“Do you like your name?” He asks.   
“I love it.” I say softly. “It’s the only thing I have from my parents.” I take my coffee and sit down. “But people now a days shorten names so they can move faster.”   
He sits down and nods. “I’ll call you Gwendolyn.” He says.   
“Why?” I say and laugh.   
“Because you like it.” He says and shrugs.   
“Thanks Kevin.” I say and smile. “So you wanted to marry my Penny.”   
“Yeah.” He says softly. “She didn’t want to marry me though.”   
“I can understand the feeling of not being wanted.” I say and bring my knees to my chest and sip my coffee.   
“Because you were never adopted?” Kevin asks.   
I look at him, shocked. “You looked me up? Did I annoy you that much that you wanted to find something to mess with me?”   
“No. I wanted to know about you. You helped me and I just wanted to know more.” He says.   
“So what did you find out?” I ask him, wanting to know what the FBI had on me.   
“Well you were orphaned at the hospital days after your birth. All that was with you was a paper that said, ‘my name is Gwendolyn’. You were put into the foster care but were never adopted. So you ran away from the system when you were fourteen. You were lost in the system until you reemerged when you were nineteen. You were in the outskirts of New York and you got you GED and then went to community college from three years. You received a free ride to NYU and you spent three more years getting a doctorate in computer science and bachelors in forensic. You received a job offer in the DC area and tried it out when you were twenty-five. You didn’t like it so you quit and got this internship.” He says.   
“The FBI is good.” I say and nod.   
“My question is, what were you doing in those five years when you were lost to the world?” He asks.   
“Oh Kevin. Sweet clueless Kevin.” I say and get up. “I’m never telling.” I say and start walking away.   
“Hey.” I hear Kevin call after me. I turn around and tilt my head. “I found your Tumblr and kind of saw that you like Doctor Who.”   
“That is also true.” I tell him.   
“Well they are showing the latest episode at the theater and was wondering if you wanted to join me in going?” He asks.   
“Sure.” I say with a shrug.   
“Cool. I’ll text you.” He says and smiles.   
“Was my number in that file you peeked at, which you’re not allowed to look at?” I ask with a smirk.   
“Possibly. You have your secrets, I have mine.” He says.   
I laugh and shake my head. “See you later Kevin.” I tell him and walk back to the lair.   
Penny turns around when I enter. “That took a while.” She observes.   
“Kevin and I were talking.” I tell her and sit down. “Any news on the case?”   
“What were you guys talking about?” She asks, getting excited.   
“Just my file.” I tell her. “The FBI has a good amount of info on me.”   
“He looked up you? Is he allowed to do that?” She asks.   
“Probably not, but I’m not going to tell.” I tell her and take a sip of my coffee. “We are going to see the Doctor Who episode in theatres. I think it is showing in a couple days.”   
“I knew you liked him!” Penny yells and moves over to me.   
“Penny, it’s not like that. He still loves you. I was nice to him and he is just being nice back.” I tell her. “I think he will be a good friend to have.”   
She sighs and goes back to her computers. “Fine, be that way.”   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
The team finishes the case. Penny and I were picking up our stuff. “How many girls has Kevin dated?” I ask.   
She stops and looks at me. “Why do you want to know?” She asks, getting a smirk on her face.   
“He knows a lot of things about me and I know none.” I tell her. “Now, I’m not one to look a person up on the FBI database just because I can like you and he does. I prefer to ask the friends of the people. They are the most honest.”   
She smiles. “He dated five girls after me.” She says. “He isn’t a player. He is a super sweet guy.”   
“I kind of figured that.” I say as I put my coat over my arm. “I’m going to see the team and then go to Rossi’s office to study.”   
“Don’t stay all night again. We want you to do well but you aren’t good to us if you have a backache from sleeping on a floor.” She tells me.   
I laugh. “I won’t. See you tomorrow.” I tell her and go out to the offices. I see Hotch and Spencer talking so I wait. Hotch leaves and I head over to Spencer. “Want to help me study?” Spencer had been staying a couple extra hours to quiz me. Him and Rossi have been helping me so much.   
“Not tonight.” He says.   
“Bad case?” I ask.   
“Bad case.” He says with a nod.   
“Need me to do anything?” I ask.   
“No. I just need sleep. I’ll be good in the morning.” He says and puts on his jacket. He looks at me. “You all good?”   
“Yeah. I’m just gonna study some.” I tell him.   
“Okay. I’ll stay tomorrow and study with you. I promise.” He says with a soft smile.   
“Sounds good, Spencer. Get some rest.” I tell him.   
He nods. “Don’t spend the night here again.” He tells me and leaves.   
I go to Rossi’s office and knocks. I hear a ‘come in’. I open the door. “Can I study in here?”   
“Of course Gattina.” Rossi says. I sit down and get settled. “Are you okay?”   
I look at him. “Do I not look okay?”   
“No, you look fine. It just you look kind of flushed.” He tells me.   
“Oh. I feel fine.” I tell him.   
“Okay, just keep an eye on it.” He says and then we both get to work. Me on my reading, and him with his paperwork.   
I work an hour and then start yawning. “I should head out.” I say and pack up.   
“Okay. Sleep well.” Rossi says as I shut the door.   
I walk to the elevators and see Kevin talking on the phone. He sees me and waves. I wave back and smile. He gets off the phone and walking over to me. “Penelope says hi.” He tells me.   
“Oh where you talking to her?” I ask.   
“Yeah, I wanted to apologize to her again for how I acted this morning.” He tells me. “Why are you here so late? Penelope said that you guys left an hour ago.”   
“I sometimes stay later to study. I wanted to be out in the field as soon as possible.” I tell him.   
“Well I could put in the computer that you already passed you test.” He says with a smile.   
“If I wanted that, I would ask Penny. She is the best.” I tell him.   
“True.” He says as we get into the elevators. “I’m glad you came with Penelope today Gwendolyn.”  
“Me too Kevin.” I say as the elevator doors open. I dig in my bag and frown. “Shit.”   
“What’s wrong?” Kevin asks.   
“Penny drove me to work today.” I say and close my eyes. “I forgot all out that.”   
“Want me to drive you home?” He asks.   
I look at him. “Didn’t she drive you here too?”   
“Yeah, but only because my sister had my car this morning. She dropped it off during the day.” He explains. “Want a ride?”   
“I would love one, thanks.” I say. He leads me to his car and I tell him my address. “So why did you pick this job?”   
“I love computers and why not work at the FBI, right?” He says and smiles at me.   
“True. That job I got was one of those agencies where you call people to ask for money. I went one day and quit. So when I got home and was looking up jobs, I saw that the FBI was looking for interns. I knew I would probably be one of the oldest interns, but I really didn’t care. Once I saw the posting, I knew I had to come here.” I say and smile. We get to my apartment and I look at him. “Thank you again.”   
“Any time.” He tells me. “Um the Doctor Who movie showing is on Friday. Do you want to get dinner beforehand?”   
I look at him. “Kevin?”   
“Yeah?” He asks, getting nervous.   
“Are you asking me out on a date?” I ask him.   
“Yeah. Was I not making it obvious enough?” He asks.   
“No, I just didn’t know.” I say and look down. “I’ve never been asked out before.”   
“Really? So this would be your first date if you say yes?” Kevin asks.   
I look at him and nod. “Isn’t that stupid?”   
“Not at all. I don’t care.” Kevin says. “Gwendolyn, will you go out with me this Friday?”   
I smile and nod. “Sure Kevin.”  
“Awesome.” He says and smiles.   
“See you then, then.” I say and laugh.   
He nods. “See you then.” He says as I get out of the car. I go into my building and pull out my phone. I had to call Penny.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still don't own Criminal Minds.   
> Still wanting Comments, or even kudos.

I walk into the offices the next day and see Penny talking to JJ, so I head over there. “Did you happen to get me coffee?” I ask Penny when I get close to her.   
“Of course Winnie.” She says and smiles at me.   
I take the coffee and notice that Penny and JJ were looking at me weird. “Um… thanks?” I say. “What are you guys doing?”   
“You have a date tonight!” Penny yells.   
“Shhhh.” I say and cover her mouth.   
“You have a date sweet stuff?” I hear behind me.   
I groan and turn around to see Morgan, Rossi, Blake and Spencer looking at us. “Yes. I have a date. Are you going to make fun of me now or later?” I ask.   
“Why would anyone laugh?” JJ asks me from behind.   
“Because this is my first ever date.” I tell them and look down. “Now you guys can make fun of the twenty-six-year-old that has never been on a date.”   
“We would never laugh at you Gattina. I think it’s nice that you haven’t.” Rossi says. “Now I don’t have to worry about beating anyone up who broke your heart in the past.”   
I smile softly at Rossi. “I wouldn’t let you hurt anyone anyways.” I tell him.   
“With who?” Spencer asks.   
I look at him. “What Spencer?”   
“Who is the date with?” He asks.   
“Oh. Um Kevin…” I say and smile softly. I was getting excited by it all.   
“It’s going to be great.” Penny says beside me.   
“We are coming over to help you get ready right?” JJ asks.   
I move back so I could see everyone. “You want to help me?” I ask.   
“Of course we do.” Penny says. “What time is he picking you up?”   
“Seven.” I tell her.   
“Okay then we will be there at 5:30. Be showered and ready to turn into Cinderella.” Penny says. “Not that you aren’t pretty right now.”   
“Penny. I understand.” I tell her and smile.   
“Well, have fun Sweet Stuff.” Morgan says as he passes me.   
Rossi comes up to me. “If he hurts you, let me know.” He tells me.   
I laugh and nod. “You will be the first one to know.” I say and hug him. “Thank you for caring about me.” I whisper.   
He hugs me back. “Any time Gattina.” He whispers back. “Any time.” We let go and he goes to his office.   
“Can we talk?” Spencer asks, coming up to me.   
“Of course.” I say and we walk to a hallway. “What’s up?”   
“I thought we were studying tonight?” He asks.   
“Don’t I get a day off? I have my first date Spencer.” I tell him.   
“Is this the right person to go out with for your first date?” He asks.   
“I think so. Kevin is a great guy and he asked me out. Why not see where this will go.” I say and shrug. “Why shouldn’t I go out with him?”   
“He has dated a lot of girls.” Spencer says.   
“So? He is trying and putting himself out there.” I tell him. “I don’t know if Kevin is my Prince Charming and I could get hurt, but I need to try, because if I don’t I could end up alone. I don’t want to be alone anymore.” I put a hand on his arm. “I’m going to try and see where this is going to go. Maybe I won’t have to go on another first date again.”   
“What if you get hurt?” He asks.   
“I will get hurt more if I don’t try.” I say. “Isn’t the saying ‘better to love and lost then never loved at all’?”   
He nods. “Yes.”   
“Then just like you had to try with Maeve, I need to try with Kevin.” I say. “Do I have your support? You are one of the most important men in my life and I want your support.”   
He sighs and nods. “Yes, you have my support.” He says and looks at me. “Just be safe. I did try with Maeve and look where that got me.”   
“I understand Spencer, but aren’t you glad you got the time you did with her?” I ask.   
“I would never trade that time.” He says and nods. “I support you Gwen.”   
“Thank you.” I tell him.   
“Gwendolyn!” I hear and look over, seeing Kevin.   
“Hey Kevin.” I say and smile. “How are you?” I ask when he walks over.   
“Good. Really good.” He says and smiles. He looks at Spencer and smiles. “Hey Spencer. I hear that you are good friends with Gwendolyn.”   
“He is my best friend.” I say and smile. “Right next to Penny.”   
“Why do you call her Gwendolyn? It’s much easier to call her Gwen.” Spencer says.   
“She likes being called Gwendolyn.” Kevin says and looks at me. “Have you got your coffee yet? I know how you can’t function till you have it.”   
“Yeah, Penny brought me some.” I tell him. “Thanks for asking.”   
“Any time.” He says and smiles. “I should get back to work. See you tonight Gwendolyn. See you Spencer.” He says and walks back to his department.   
I grin and look at Spencer. “You like being called Gwendolyn?”   
“Yeah. Everyone just shortens it, so I don’t say anything.” I say and shrug.   
“Do you want me to call you Gwendolyn?” Spencer asks.   
I shake my head. “No, you like to do things fast and don’t have time to say it all. I’m fine with people calling me Gwen.” I tell him.   
“How come he knows that you like to be called by your full name and you just started talking to him?” Spencer asks.   
“Because he asked.” I say and start walking back to the offices. I see Penny and JJ talking still, so I walk over there. “Guess who made a trip down to the BAU just to see if I had my coffee yet.”   
“Kevin?” JJ asks.   
“Kevin.” I say. “This is so weird.”   
“Why?” Penny asks. “He is a sweet guy. He will probably start bringing you coffee every morning.”   
“I’ve never had a guy do these kind of things before.” I say and smile softly. “I kind of like it.”   
“What did Spence want?” JJ asks.   
“He wanted to make sure I was making the right decision in going out with Kevin.” I tell her and grab my coffee I left her. “He is looking out for me but I told him I wanted to see how things would play out.”   
“Okay so we will be at your apartment at 5:30 tonight.” JJ says and smiles.   
“Yes. I’m getting nervous and it is still ten hours away.” I say and smile.   
“Oh you are so cute.” Penny says and takes my hand. “We have paperwork to take your mind off the date.” She leads me to lair.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
The day went by super slow. The paper work only lasted till lunch and there were no cases that we had to get ready for. After lunch, I walk over to Spencer’s desk to see him trying to do something with Morgan and JJ watching. As I walked over, something hit me on my nose and fell down. I bend down and pick up and cap. I look at the others and see them staring at me. “Are we five?” I ask Spencer.   
“No. I’m seven.” He tells me with a smirk.   
I roll my eyes and hand him his cap back. “Such a butt head.” I tell him. “You got that really far.”   
“Thanks.” He says and looks at me. “Did you need me for something?”   
“Are you doing any paperwork?” I ask.   
“Nope. I did all mine. These two have not.” He says. We look at JJ and Morgan and they head to their desks. “What do you need?”   
“Study time?” I ask.   
He smiles and gets up. “Sounds great.” We go into the round table room and sit at the couches. “Okay question one.” Spencer starts. We spend the rest of the day studying. “I think you are ready for the tests.” Spencer tells me.   
“Really? You think so?” I ask.   
“I wouldn’t say so if I didn’t.” He says and smiles. “I think you should talk to Hotch about taking the tests.”   
“I’ll go right now.” I tell him, standing up. I pack my stuff up and look at him. “Thank you for all your help. I wouldn’t have been able to get so far so fast without you helping me so much.” I tell him and hug him.   
He hugs back. “I’m only doing what you would do if I was in your spot.” He tells me as we pull apart.   
“Did you just paraphrase my words?” I ask him.   
“I might have.” He says and smiles. “Go talk to Hotch. Have fun on your date.” He tells me and leaves.   
I head to Hotch’s office and see that the door is open. I knock on the open door and smile. “I’m ready to take the tests sir.”   
Hotch looks up and smiles. “Good. I knew it wouldn’t take you too long.” He says. “Come sit.”   
I sit down and smile. “It was because of Rossi and Spencer that I moved as fast as I did. They helped me a lot.”   
“I know they did. They did it because they care for you. You are important to all of us. We are so excited that you are doing this.” He tells me.   
“Thank you sir.” I say.   
“Okay, so down to business.” He says. “You will take your first test on Monday. Since you are not like most applicants, you will have to take your test here. I will be watching over you with Strauss. The first test is three hours long.” He explains. “I’m guessing that you will want to do everything in one day?”   
“Yes, I want to do it as fast as I can.” I tell him.   
“Okay, so after the first test, you will have your ninety-minute writing test. After that Strauss and I will do an hour long interview.” He tells me. “Will you be ready?”   
I nod. “I will be ready.” I tell him.   
“Okay. You do know you will have to go to the basic field training course for twenty-one weeks?” he asks.   
“I did know that sir.” I tell him. “I have been training. I don’t think I will be ready for the training right away but I will get there.”   
“That’s fine Gwen. You go have fun tonight. Come in on Monday, rested and ready to take tests all day.” He tells me and smiles softly.   
“Will do sir. Thank you.” I say and leave his office. I see Spencer packing up and I go to him. “Hey, guess what?”   
“What?” He says as he looks at me.   
“I’m taking my written tests on Monday.” I tell him. “I’m ready for it and that is all thanks to you and Rossi.”   
“That’s great Gwen.” He says and grins at me. “I’m so proud. Does this mean that you will be leaving us for twenty-one weeks?”   
“Not yet. I am not up to standards yet. I’ve trained with Morgan this past week but I’m not ready yet.” I tell him. “I have to be able to pass the PFT before I can even go to training.”   
“Right.” He says and looks at me. “So you ready for your date?”   
“Not really. I don’t know what to do on dates.” I tell him. “Any advice?”   
“Gwen, I’ve never been on a date either.” He tells me. “The closest I have been to a date is when I was waiting for Maeve and when I took JJ to a football game.”   
“Okay. So you are totally the wrong person to ask.” I say with a smile. He shakes his head. “Okay, well I better be getting home. I have an hour and half till Penny and JJ come over to try and make me date ready. Hopefully they can do a little magic in an hour and half.” I start walking to the elevators. “See you later Spencer.”   
“See you Gwen.” He calls after me.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
I got home and was able to take a shower and shave my legs before Penny and JJ arrived. I lead them to my bedroom. “Okay so my closet is there and my makeup is at the makeup table. Where do you want me?” I ask.   
“Penny, you pick the outfit while I get her makeup ready?” JJ suggests.   
“Sounds perfect.” Penny says.   
I close my eyes and let JJ work her magic. I was hoping that they could turn this pumpkin into a normal looking person for just one night. JJ turns me away from the mirror so I wouldn’t be able to see myself. “I found the cutest outfit.” Penny says. She brings out a quarter length sleeve shirt with the shoulders cut out. She paired it with a pair of cute jeans and a black heel.   
“That is cute. Comfy but looks nice.” JJ says. “And it goes with her make-up.   
“Perfect. Now just hair.” Penny says. “Close your eyes Winnie.” I sigh and do as I am told. I keep my eyes close for almost a half an hour when I hear. “Okay Winnie, open your eyes.”   
I open my eyes and am greeted by someone who kind of looks like me, but is way hotter. “How did you do this?”   
“I just curled your hair and made your eyes smoky. You have the looks, Gwen. You are so beautiful.” JJ tells me.   
“You are witch.” I tell her. “I look so hot.”   
“You always look like this. I just did things a little different.” JJ says.   
“You are a beautiful women Winnie. You just have to believe it.” Penny says.   
“Thank you guys for all of this.” I say, standing up. I give them a big hug and smile. “You are the best friends a girl could ask for.”   
“You are welcome sweetie.” JJ says. “We should leave. It’s almost seven.”   
“Wait.” I say and start to freak out. “I don’t know how to do this.”   
“Just be yourself.” JJ says.   
“I can’t do that.” I say.   
“Being yourself is what made him ask you out.” Penny says.   
“What if… I just mess things up.” I ask.   
“Then the world ends and we all die.” JJ says, laughing.   
“I know I’m being stupid, but I don’t want to ruin this on a first date.” I say.   
“Oh sweetie. You are not being stupid. I was the same way when I first meet Will. I was that way until I…” JJ stops and thinks. “I’m still that way. For the right person though, even your mess ups will make them love you.”   
I nod and smile. “Okay, get out of here. I’ll call you guys when I get home.”   
“If you come home tonight.” Penny says.   
I instantly blush and push her out of my room. “I am going to make it home tonight.” I tell him.   
“Okay, okay. I understand Winnie.” Penny says. She stops and turns about. “Be happy Winnie. Enjoy yourself tonight. You will only get one true first date.”   
I smile and nod. “I will.” I tell her and lead them out of my apartment. I still had ten minutes to wait. I sigh and get my purse ready. I look in the mirror and smile. I really did look great. I take a quick selfie and send it to Spencer. I get a text back from him saying ‘You look great. Good luck tonight.’ I smile and hear the doorbell. I freeze and close my eyes. “It’s only Kevin. It’s only Kevin.” I tell myself as I walk over to the door. I look out my peep hole and see Kevin standing there. I smile and open the door. “Hey Kevin.”   
“Hey Gwend…” Kevin says and looks at me. “Woah.”   
“What? Do I have something on my shirt? I thought it was clean.” I say, looking down at my shirt.   
“No Gwendolyn, you look amazing… not that you don’t always look amazing.” Kevin says, kind of fast.   
I smile. “I understand. Thank you Kevin. You look very nice too.” I tell him.   
He hands me a bouquet of roses. “These are for you.” He tells me.   
“For me?” I ask, taking the flowers. “They are beautiful.” I say and grin. “You didn’t have to buy me these.”   
“I wanted to bring something beautiful to the beautiful woman.” He tells me.   
I blush and smell the flowers. “Thank you.” I tell him. “Let me put these in some water and then we can go.” I say and go to my kitchen. Kevin walks in and shuts the door. “You can come in more. Don’t worry about taking your shoes off. I’m not picky.” I tell him.   
“Sounds good.” I hear him say. I get a vase and put the flowers and water into it. I set them up and smile. I go out to the living room and see him looking at my books. “You have a lot here.”   
“That is not even all of them. I have a computer room and its wall also have the shelfing. Those are all the rest of my books.” I tell him.   
“I’m guessing you like to read.” He says as he looks at me.   
“Love to.” I tell him. “Should we get going?”   
“Of course.” He says. He walks to me and offers me his arm. “M’lady.” He says.   
I giggle and take his arm. “Such a gentleman.” I say and grab my purse on the way out. I lock my door and we head to his car.   
We get to a nice restaurant and Kevin comes around and opens my door for me. “You know you don’t have to act any different with me than with any of your past girlfriends.” I tell him as I get out.   
“Gwendolyn, I want this to be the best experience for you. So I won’t treat this like any other date, because I want this to be special and not just a normal outing.” He tells me.   
“Why? Why do all this for just me?” I ask as we walk up to the restaurant.   
“Because you are special. I can see it.” He says. “I just want your first ever date to be one you want to remember and not one that was just normal.”   
I was touched by his sincerity. “Thank you Kevin.” I say and kiss his cheek.   
“Anything for you.” He says and leads me into the restaurant. We get seated and we start talking about our jobs. “So you are going to take your tests on Monday?”   
“Yeah. I take the two tests and do an interview.” I explain.   
“Don’t you have to do a fitness test too?” He asks.   
“Yes, but I’m not ready for that so I will be waiting and training for a little before I do that.” I tell him. “Morgan already has a plan for it. I get tired just looking at it.” I say and laugh.   
He laughs. “Yeah, I don’t think I could ever pass that test. I’m fine with just sitting at my computer.”   
“I do enjoy that, which is why I got my doctrine in it, but I really do like looking at the crime scenes and trying to figure out why someone who do that type of thing to a human.” I explain.   
“That’s why you are so amazing Gwendolyn.” He says and smile.   
“Thank you.” I say and look down.   
We get our dinner and start eating in a comfortable silence. “Do you want desert or just want to get something from the movie? Or we could do both.” He asks as we finish our dinner.   
“Let’s get something from the theater.” I suggest.   
“Sounds good to me.” He says and calls a waiter over. He pays and we go out to his car. He opens the door and I smile.   
“Thank you again, Kevin.” I say and get in.   
“You know, once you get to the field, I am going to be worried sick about you.” He tells me on our way to the theatre.   
“Why is that?” I ask.   
“Because, those agents risk their lives to save these people. I will be waiting after every mission you go on to make sure that you return safe.” He tells me.   
“You know; I will be hurt sometimes. It’s just part of the job.” I tell him.   
“I know. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t do it. I’m just saying that I will be waiting after every mission to make sure that you are safe.” He says. He reaches down and takes my hand. I squeeze it and smile.   
“I’m okay with that.” I tell him. We get to the theatre and get our food. We go and find out spots and I look at him. “I’m glad you asked me out.”   
“I’m glad too.” Kevin says. He puts his arm around me and I grin. We watch the episode and he drives me home. “I had a good time tonight.”   
“I did too. We will have to do this again.” I tell him.   
“Yes we will.” He says and smiles.   
I lean over and give him a little peak and get out of the car. “Thank you for the great night Kevin.”   
“Um… yeah. Do you want me to walk you up?” He asks.   
“No thank you. You get home safe.” I tell him and start walking to my door.   
“Gwendolyn.” I hear. I turn around and see Kevin looking out of the window. “How do you like your coffee?”   
“Three sugars and two creamers in French Vanilla coffee.” I tell him.   
“Okay. Don’t get any on Monday. I’ve got it covered.” He tells me.   
“Sounds like a plan.” I tell him and go into my building. I get in my apartment and look down and see Kevin looking up at my window. I wave and he waves back. He closes the window and drives off. I smile and sit on my couch. I call Penny and JJ in a conference call.   
“How was it?” Penny asks.   
“It was great. He treated me like a princess.” I tell them.   
“I knew you would have a great time.” JJ says. “Did he like how you dressed.”   
“He said I looked amazing.” I tell them. “He brought flowers.”   
“I told you that someone would give you flowers.” JJ says and I could hear the smile in her voice.   
“I need to head to bed. Morgan is coming over tomorrow.” I tell them.   
“Why is chocolate thunder coming over? Can I join you guys?” Penny asks.   
“You don’t want to come over. We are training for the PFT.” I tell her.   
“Oh gross.” She says.   
“I told you. I’ll see you guys Monday.” I tell her.   
“Okay night girly.” JJ tells me.   
“Sweet tight Winnie.” Penny tells me and I hang up. I turn off my lights, not before looking at my flowers again, and then go to bed.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guess what? Still don't own Criminal Minds!

It had been a month since my date with Kevin and things were going great. We would meet up every morning, talk every night, and he would try and see me at least three times a week, wither it be for a date, lunch, or him coming over with dinner for me and Penny when the team had a case. He was such a great guy. He was even joining me on my horrible diet Morgan had me on. I wasn’t allowed to eat any added sugar, which meant no coffee. I was not happy with that one and on some days, I was ready to give in and just quit. But then someone who calm me down and bring me back to my goal. I was so happy to have the team. I knew I wouldn’t be able to do any of this without them.   
I was having lunch with Spencer and were talking about the PFT. “So you think you will be ready next week?” He asks me.   
“Yeah. I have been in the FBI standards for the last week so Morgan told me that tomorrow we would do the whole test and see if I was able to do it all together.” I tell him.   
“That is great Gwen.” He says with a small smile.   
“What is wrong Spencer? You haven’t been acting the same in a while.” I ask him and place a hand on his hand.   
“I’ve been having these dreams, Gwen.” He starts off.   
“What are they about?” I ask.   
“I’ve talked to Rossi about it if you don’t want to listen.” He says.   
“Spencer. I want to listen to what has been bothering you.” I tell him. “Please tell me.”   
“Well it has been three months and seventeen days since Maeve died.” He starts off. “I haven’t been sleeping because she has been in my dreams. She is there and I am so relieved. I see her and it makes me so happy. She asks me to dance and I can’t dance and I never touched her so I can’t dance. I wake up and I’m not sleeping. I don’t want to go back when I know I can’t dance with her.” He says and looks down. “Rossi says I should just let the dream play out and go from there but I’m worried if I do then I will either lose myself or lose her. I don’t want to do either. I want her to be here with me.”   
“I’m sorry you have to go through that but I think you should follow Rossi’s idea. I think it could help you.” I tell him. “You will never forget her Spencer. Even when you don’t have a memory like yours, you remember those dear to you who have passed on. It is a blessing and a curse.”   
“I just don’t want her to become a distant memory that only comes into my mind when I think of death.” He says.   
“I don’t think that will happen Spencer.” I say and rub his hand. “If I could trade places with her, I would do it just to know that you would be happy.”  
“Don’t say that Gwen. I would be like this if you died. I don’t want you gone either. Don’t say that.” He tells me, grabbing my hand.   
“Sorry.” I say and look down.   
“Gwen, I would never want anyone in our team to be gone for Maeve to be back.” He says. “You guys mean as much as she did.”   
I look up and nod. “Sorry. I was just trying to make you feel better.” I say.   
“Well I would hate to see a world without Gwen in it.” He says.   
“It would be the same world.” I say softly and eat my lunch, not knowing Spencer heard me.   
The next day, Morgan tests me in the PFT and I get a 14 on it, when all you need is a 12. “You are lying to me. I did not get a fourteen.” I say to Morgan.   
“I’m not lying. You did great Sweet stuff.” Morgan tells me. “And since I am a trainer for the FBI, I can officially say that you have passed the PFT and you are ready for basic training.”   
I look at him and grin. “Holy shit. No way!” I say.   
“Yes way.” He says and grin. “We are shipping you out.”   
I run up to him and hug him. “Thank you!” I yell.   
He hugs me back. “No problem. You were easier to train than pretty boy.” I back up and smile. “He still doesn’t like when I train him for the retests.”   
“He doesn’t?” I ask.   
“Nope. He complains that I push him too hard. That’s what was nice about you sweet stuff. You took what I was telling you and pushed harder.” Morgan says.   
“I just want to get on the field.” I tell him.   
“Let’s go back to the BAU and take a shower. We can tell Hotch that you finally passed your test.” Morgan says.   
“Finally? What do you mean finally?” I ask.   
“I’m messing with you girly.” Morgan says as we get into the car. “You did good. You trained in a good amount of time. You are going to do good at basic training.”   
“Okay, thanks.” I tell him. I close my eyes on the way back. Morgan made me get up at seven to get ready. I was so tired and ready to be able to have coffee again. We get back to the BAU and I start heading to the showers. “Don’t you want to be the one to tell Hotch that you passed the test?” He asks me.   
I stop and turn around. “Yes.” I say and run up to Hotch’s office. I rush in but no one was there. “Where is he?” I ask Morgan as he walks up.   
“Maybe the conference room?” He asks.   
I nod and run into the room and am suddenly surprised by a group of people yelling “Surprise!” I look around and see the team and Kevin smiling at me.   
“Guys, what is this?” I ask, looking at them.   
“Well, Morgan told us that you were going to pass the PFT today and so I set up a little party to celebrate it.” Penny explains.   
“Oh guys.” I say and rush to Penny and hug her. “You are the best!” I look at the table and see cake. “Is that cake?” I ask.   
“Yes and we even got you your coffee.” Spencer told me.   
“Oh you guys.” I say and smile. I rush over to Spencer and he hands me a large cup of coffee. I take a big gulp out of it and smile. “Perfection.”   
I go to Kevin and smile. “You were in on this too?”   
“Of course. I want to celebrate my girlfriend’s accomplishments.” He tells me.   
I freeze. “Girlfriend?” I ask, looking at him.   
“Um, yeah. Do you not want to be my girlfriend?” He asks. “Should I have asked?”   
“Um, no. I just didn’t… um.” I look at him. “I’ll be right back. Please don’t go anywhere.” I say. He nods and I look at him and nod. I run to Penny and pull her out of the room into the hallway. “He wants me to be his girlfriend. I don’t know how to do that.” I tell her as soon as we are alone. “I’m going to mess everything up. I am freaking out. Help me.”   
“Winnie. Take a deep breath and hold it.” She tells me. I do what she says. “Okay, now let it out and listen to what I am saying.” I let my breath go and nod. “You like Kevin right?” I nod. “You like what you do with him?” I nod again. “Then you are his girlfriend. It isn’t any different from what you are doing now.” She tells me.   
“What if he wants other things.” I say softly, looking around.   
“Oh sweet child.” She says and sits us down. “Sweetie. I can’t tell you when you will be ready but just listen to gut.”   
I nod and sigh. “I should probably get back to him. He is probably getting flashbacks to when you turned him down.” I say and get up.   
“Let’s go calm that poor man down.” She says and we head back into the party.   
I go over to Kevin, who was sitting down on the couches. “Hey Kevin.” I say as I sit down.   
“Gwendolyn, if you don’t want to be my girlfriend, I understand. I just need you to be honest.” Kevin says softly.   
I kiss him softly and pull back. “Does that feel like I want to break up?” I ask with a smile.   
“Nope.” He says and smiles.   
“I was nervous. I’ve never been anyone’s girlfriend. I just needed Penny to calm me down.” I explain.   
“I understand Gwendolyn. Thank you for being honest.” He says and leans his forehead on mine. “I’m going to miss you.”   
“I will too. It’s going to be weird to not see you every day.” I tell him. “It will be weird not seeing any of my family every day.” I say and look out at the team. I was nervous about leaving. I get up. “Let’s have fun and think about that when I leave.”   
I spent all of Saturday and Sunday with the team and Kevin. Monday morning, Penny, Rossi, Spencer, and Kevin take me to the academy. Penny and I cried while the boys just look sad. “Rossi, you are the closes thing to a dad and I’m going to miss you so much.” I tell Rossi.   
“Gattina, you are just like my daughter. I’m going to miss you too. I’ll be here when you graduate and there will no one more proud than me there.” He says.   
“Oh Rossi.” I say and hug him.   
“Gattina, make me proud okay?” He asks as I back up.   
“Oh course I will.” I tell him. I move to Penny. “Oh Penny. My first friend. My mentor. My sister from another mister. I’m going to miss you so much.” I tell her and hug her.   
“It’s only five months.” She says, crying again. We pull back. “It will pass like nothing.”   
I nod. “Yes. You won’t even have time to miss me.” I tell her.   
“I’ll call if I need your help on a case.” She tells me.   
“You better.” I tell her and move to Spencer. “You mister better call if you need to talk. I don’t want to come back and see a half asleep Spencer zombie.” I tell him.   
“I will Gwen.” He says and hugs me. “I’m going to miss you.”   
“I’m going to miss you too.” I tell him and close my eyes. “Make sure you text me with my daily fact. I don’t want to get stupid without them.” I tell him as we pull back.   
“Did you between 30%–38% of psychopaths show abnormal brainwave patterns, or EEGs.” Spencer tells me.   
“I do now.” I say and smile. “Call me.” I tell him and move in front of Kevin. “Are you going to miss me?”   
“Is that even a real question?” He asks.   
“Make sure to not watch any of the new Doctor Who episodes till I get back. I’ll know if you do.” I tell him.   
“I already said I wouldn’t Gwendolyn.” He says and smiles.   
“I’ll know.” I tell him and hug him. “Call me tonight.”   
“Was already planning it.” He tells me and kisses my head.   
I pull back and smile at the four of them. “I feel like I’m a kindergartener with my parents dropping me off.” I laugh.   
“Have a good day sweetie.” Rossi says.   
“Don’t fight with the others.” Spencer says.   
“Don’t eat the paste.” Penny says.   
“Make friends.” Kevin says.   
“Thanks guys. At least I finally got my kindergarten send off.” I tell them. I look at the building. “I should be going.”   
“Do you have everything you need?” Rossi asks.   
“Yes, dad.” I say and roll my eyes with a smile on my face. “Bye guys. Tell the others I say bye.”   
“Will do.” Penny says and I walk into my home for the next five months.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Five months later-  
-Spencer’s POV-   
Gwen has been gone for five months now and it was like a hole was in each other team’s heart. We finally got the replicator but we were all missing Gwen. Kevin was hanging around us more than usual, usually with Penelope. They would have a call from Gwen after a case and they would be telling her about it. I really didn’t like to see Kevin around. I didn’t think he was right for Gwen. I tried to talk to Morgan about what I was feeling, but he just kept saying that I was jealous, but that was stupid. What was I jealous of? I just knew that Gwen deserved someone better than Kevin. I know Rossi was talking to Gwen a lot, more after Strauss was killed. I knew that Rossi wished she was here when the replicator was out there to keep her safer, but we all knew that her safest spot was at the academy. I talked to her a lot too. I would call after a bad case or if I had another Maeve dream. It was a long time since Maeve had been in my dreams. In the last one, Maeve was telling me to move on with my life. She told me that I would love again but I didn’t want to believe that I would find someone as special as Maeve.   
It was drawing near to when Gwen would graduate from the academy and we were all planning to go together. I knew Penny was planning a party to celebrate. I was walking into the office the Monday before the graduation, planning on doing paperwork. Hotch got the new director to agree to no cases until Gwen’s graduation. It took a lot of persuading, but we got it. I sit at my desk and get my paperwork started. “Everyone in the conference room. Now.” I hear Hotch say and I look at the others.   
“We aren’t supposed to have a case this week.” I say to the others.   
“Maybe it’s one that can’t wait.” JJ says as we get up. We walk into the room to see Kevin pacing. Penny was almost in tears.   
“What is going on?” I ask Hotch.   
He looks at us and sighs. “Gwen has been taken.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey readers. I hope I have readers. This chapter has some scenes in here that could trigger someone so if you think you won't be able to read this chapter please don't read it. I don't want anyone to get hurt because of my writing. 
> 
> Okay so I still don't own Criminal Minds.

"What do you mean she is gone? I just talked to her this morning about us coming there." I tell Hotch.

"She was on her way to come talk to Cruz since she hasn't met him yet and after she didn't make it to the meeting, the FBI sent a car to look for her. The car she took was on the side of the road ten minutes from here." Hitch tells us. "We are going to the site right now. Penelope and Kevin. I need you two to look for anything to help us. Can you do that or should we get someone else?" He asks the two it analysts.

"No, we can do it." Penelope tells Hotch.

"Yes sir, we can do it." Kevin says. They exit the room and we all look at Hotch.

"Why would anyone want Gwen?" I ask Hotch. "She has been in training for the last five months. She hasn't done anything to hurt anyone or put anyone away."

"It could be to hurt us. The unsubscribe could know how important she is to is and want to hurt someone innocent but someone who will hurt us." Hotch says. He looks at us. "Can anyone not do this case?" He asks looking at me.

"I'm fine. I just need to get Gwen back." I tell him. Alive I think, thinking of Maeve and the conversation I had with Gwen before she left.

If I could trade places with Maeve and bring her back, I would. Just so you two would be happy together.

I didn't want Gwen dead too. I don't know if I would be to stay in this job if she did die. I shake my head and follow the team to the cars. Rossi looks at me and smiles softly. "We'll find her kid." He says to me.

I nod and look out the window. He was in the same boat I was. He just lost Strauss and now he might lose his daughter figure. We both needed Gwen to be okay. We get to we're her car was found and we all get out. "We haven't touched anything for you." The police tell us as we walk to the car.

"Thank you." Hotch says and we look at the car. "Okay so she must have stopped because no one was in the car with her."

"She would have stopped for a number of reasons. Gwen had a big heart." Blake says.

"Has." I correct her.

"What?" Blake asks.

"You said had. She has a big heart. Gwen isn't dead." I say and look and the front seat. "She wasn't pulled out so she must have been asked to help or maybe some animal was hurt."

"Okay say it was someone looking for help, there would have to be some type of evidence for that." Morgan says.

We all start looking around. "I have something." Rossi says and we all run over. In his gloved hand, he was holding a cat necklace. "I gave this to her as a pre-graduation gift. I wanted to show her I was proud of her."

"Let's get it to evidence and see if there are other finger prints on it." Hotch says and gives the necklace to the officers who were assisting the case.

"Did anyone else find any proof of Gwen getting kidnaped?" Hotch asks.

"There are tire marks but that could have already been here." JJ says.

"Let's get a photo of it to Garcia and see if she can find out anything." Hotch says and get back into the cars.

"She wouldn't have just dropped that necklace for no reason. She was so happy when I gave it to her." Rossi says as we head back. "She told me that she had never been give a graduation gift and that she would always wear it. Gwen is not a liar. If she didn't like it, she would have told me."

"She left it there so you would find it and know that she was taken. She left it as a clue." I tell him.

SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR

-Gwen's POV-

I wake up in a dark room and I try to look around but I am strapped to a board. I try to think of what happened to me but I had too much of a headache. I close my eyes for second and then I hear someone coming. I open my eyes and stare at the ceiling. At training they told us to try and picture somewhere else so the pain is less bad. I guess I was going to have to use that training right away. I hear the door open and a mans face appears over me. "She is awake." He says and smiles. "Hello Gwendolyn."

"Hello." I say to him.

"You have become so beautiful." He says and looks at me closer. "We should have kept his one Marge." He tells someone.

A woman's face appears over me and she looks me up and down. "A little to fat for my taste." She says. "But we can solve that."

"She might be worth money." The man says.

"Oh yeah. A lot of people would pay for her." The woman says.

"Um pay for what?" I ask.

"To have sex with you darling." The man says and smirks. He and woman leaves and I just look up at the ceiling. I was going to die here. I would die before I let anyone touch me

I close my eyes and think of Kevin and Penny and Spencer. I wish I could see their faces one last time.

-Spencer's POV-

we were no where closer to finding Gwen then we were the day before. "Kevin are you doing anything but being a useless tool?" I yell at Kevin.

"Listen here small fry. I am working as fast as I can to find my girlfriend. I'm sorry not everyone here can read 20,000 words a minute." He says and glares at me.

"You never should have dated her. She should be dating someone better!" I yell back.

"Like who? You?" He asks.

"Maybe!" I yell and freeze. "Penelope come get me if you find anything out." I tell Penelope and leave the room. I got find Morgan and pull him into his office. "I think I might have feelings for Gwen."

"I knew it." He says.

"I had a dream a couple of months ago about Maeve and she told me that I had someone else that I would love. What if that was my subconscious telling me that I like her. I could have told her a month ago!" I say and sit down. "I have to find her alive Morgan. I can't have this be another Maeve case."

Morgan sits down and looks at me. "Okay I need to ask you something and I need you to really think before answering. " Morgan says to me. I look at him and nod. "Could this be in any way your feelings for Maeve transferred onto Gwen? They cases are similar and I don't want you to get into this huge thing of drama if you don't have to."

I think about how Maeve made me feel and then how Gwen makes me feel. I shake my head "are you sure?" Morgan asks.

"No. my feelings for Gwen are of her own. No Maeve in the situation." I tell him.

"Okay well lets go find our girl so we can go head first into this mess pool of drama.

SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR

“Guys! We have a visual!” Penelope says as she comes down the hall with her laptop. 

“Visual?” Hotch asks. 

“Kevin was sent a link and a message saying that it would show us Gwen. And we'll it has.” Penelope explains. 

“Well lets see it.” I say. “It will us clues.” 

“Sweetie. I don't think you want to see this.” She tells me. 

“No I do. It could help us find her.” I say, confused why I wouldn't want to see the video. 

“Okay…” She says. She sets up the visual link in the conference room and all we see is some grainy black background. “Where is she?” As soon as I say anything, a light snaps on and we see Gwen strapped to a wooden board. 

“That is a great question Dr. Reid.” A mans voice says and we see a figure get on the screen. He wasn't wearing a mask or anything so we saw his face. Unsub don't do that unless they know they aren't going to get caught or just don't care. In either case, it didn't work out for the victims. In most cases, when the unsub didn't cover up their identity, it meant they were going to kill the victim right away. Was that why we were watching? To see Gwen die? If so, I didn't want be here. “Okay, so I see all of the team but no Mr. Lynch. Someone get him here!” The unsub yells. 

“Penelope call Kevin and tell him come in here.” Hotch tells Penelope. 

“O-okay.” She says and goes and calls him from the corner. 

“We are doing as you say. Now you know all of us, but we don't know you. Why don't you tell us who you are.” Hotch tells the unsub. 

“You'll find out soon. We just need to play a game before anything can happen.” The unsub says. Kevin walks in and looks at the video and frowns. “Oh good. The whole set is here. Gwendolyn, do you want to say anything to your team?” The board slowly moves so Gwen was facing us. She was still fully dressed so there was a good chance that she hasn't been sexually assaulted. I look at her and notice a collar on her neck. “Oh come on Gwendolyn. You haven't seen your team in five months and you don't want to tell them hi or anything?” The unsub asks and walks to Gwen. He raises his hand and makes Gwen look at him. 

“Get your hands off of her!” Kevin yells. I look at him, noticing he looked sick and sad. 

“Oh is Mr. Lynch getting jealous?” I hear the unsub say. I look back at the video. “You have no reason to get jealous. I'm not going to do anything to Gwendolyn. I wouldn't be a good father if I did.” 

“Wait you are Gwen’s father?” Rossi asks. 

“Yes Mr. Rossi. Your Gattina is my daughter. You should be the one who is jealous because I finally have my daughter back and you will never see her again.” The unsub says and smiles. “Well you won't see her alive.” 

“If you are her father, then why are you doing this to her?” Rossi asks. I could hear his anger in his voice. 

“Because my wife made us get rid of her because we had enough daughters.” The unsub explains and rubs Gwen’s hair. “She wanted a son but I wanted to keep Gwendolyn. I thought she would be a good follower. I knew she would grow up to be just good enough to bring us money. If we would have raised her, she would already be sold. She would have been one of the fastest little girls sold.” The unsub sighs and smiles at the camera. “But that didn't happen so Gwendolyn will just have to makes us the money now. Gwendolyn you still haven't said hi to your little friends. Tell them hi or they die.” 

Gwen looks at the camera and I could see a tear run down her cheek. “Hi-“ as soon as Gwen tried to talk the collar activated and shocked Gwen. At the pain she screamed out and the collar just shocked her more. She bites her lip to stop herself and the collar shuts off. 

“Oh that is my favorite part!” The unsub says and claps in joy. He looks back at the camera and smiles. “I'm going to start selling Gwendolyn in 12 hours. She might be in one piece or she might be in a bunch of pieces. Depends on how much people are willing to pay. You have 12 hours and then she is mine.” He tells us and then shuts off the video feed. 

Penelope breaks down once the feed is shut off. JJ goes over to her and wraps her arms around her. “Did either of you track the video?” Hotch asks Kevin and Penelope. 

“I was trying before I was called in here.” Kevin says. He sits down and puts his head in his hands. “I was almost there too.” 

“Any way to track it still?” Hotch asks 

“There is a chance. Kevin lets go.” Penelope says, tears still rolling down her cheeks. Kevin leads Penelope out of the room. 

“Okay. What did everyone see?” Hotch asks 

“The unsub didn't hide his face.” I tell him and sit down. I was getting tired of people I cared about getting kidnapped. 

“That is a good thing. If Penelope or Kevin can get the video we can track his face.” Hotch says and calls Penelope. 

“Yes sir?” Penelope asks, sounding like she just watched a puppy getting kicked. 

“If you can try and find the video and see if the unsub’s face is in our systems that would also be good.” Hotch tells her. 

“We will work on it and call you if there is any news.” Penelope says and hangs up. 

“Okay what else did we see?” Hotch asks. 

“Gwen. Getting hurt.” JJ says softly. 

“We can't focus on Gwen. We need to treat this like any other case.” Hotch tells us. 

“So we should do a victimology.” Morgan says. “He said that Gwen is his father. So that means that we are looking for a male who has lost something or someone in the recent past and he is looking for his lost daughter to fill the hole.” 

“That man is not Gwen’s father.” Rossi says. 

“Rossi. I know how much Gwen means to you but if he says he is her biological father then we have to believe he is.” Hotch tells Rossi. 

Rossi gets up and leaves the room, slamming the door on the way out. “Do you want me to go talk to him?” I ask Hotch. 

“Yes please.” Hotch tells me. 

I follow Rossi into his office. “Rossi.” I say softly. 

“Why would a father take his own daughter? If Gwen was my daughter I would treat her like a princess.” Rossi says and sits down. “Why kidnap her? Why hurt her?” 

I sit down. “I don't know Rossi. I really don't know. I do know that she needs you. We need you to focus on finding her and not how the unsub is hurting her. We need to have clear minds and then we will be able to save her.” 

He sighs and nods. “I know that, I really do but…” 

“I know Rossi. I know.” I say. 

“I just lost Strauss.” He says. “I can't lose my Gattina.” 

“Then lets go back in there and find out where she is.” I say and stand up. 

Rossi stands up and looks at me. “Let's do it.”

SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR

-Gwen's POV- 

After seeing the team, the unsub walked over to me. “See daddy is a kind and fair guy.” He says to me. 

I glare at him. “Not my dad.” I say, rushing to get it out before the collar shocked me. I feel the electric run through me and I can't help but not to scream. I try to get my hands free to get the collar off but I was the bonds were tight. I close my eyes and bite my lip again to stop screaming. I already knew my lip was bleeding from how much I was biting it but I didn't care. 

“I am your father missy. And you do as I say or I'll kill you now and let your team find you here dead.” He tells me and gets a long knife and points it at me. “Are you going to be a good girl?” He asks me. I just nod and look away. “Good.” He tells me and moves the board back down so I was looking up at the ceiling. “I told your team that you would be alive in 12 hours but I never said that you wouldn't be hurt.” He tells me and smiles. I shake my head and try to stop any tears that we're building in my eyes. “Oh I've been waiting to do this.” He takes his knife and cuts a line down both of my legs. I scream and the collar shocks me. I start crying and look away. I was trying to go to my happy place that the academy taught to me but I just could focus. The unsub grabs my face and makes me look at him. I could feel my blood on his hands. “Your screams are so nice. I want to hear it some more.” He says and smiles.   
I close my eyes and focus on this tree I found when I ran away from the system. It was a tall oak tree but it had branches that I could climb up. I loved that tree. It had enough coverage so I could just disappear from life and coverage from the weather. I didn't stay there long because I didn't really have clothes for the winter. After begging on the street for a couple months, this older woman brought me to the area she lived at. It was a community of the homeless. They are the reason I stayed alive through the five years. There were kids my age that got to go to school and so they would come back to the group and would teach me what they learned. I lived there till I was nineteen and knew I wouldn't have to back into the system. I try to think about how I felt when the old woman let me stay in her community. It helped for a little until I felt something go into my thigh and I broke out of my thoughts. I take deep breaths and try to forget the pain that filled my body. He wanted me to scream and I knew that if I gave into him, there was a chance that he could just kill me. I shallow and look at the man. He was frowning and he took the knife out and slammed it in my thigh again. I bit my lip and close my eyes. ‘Think of Kevin. Of Rossi. Of Spencer. Of penny. Of the team. Of my real family.’ I tell my self and take deep breaths. 

“You useless girl.” He tells me and leaves the room. 

I take deep breaths and look at my hands. They were bound by ropes. I take a deep breath and start to move my hand and try to get it out. I almost had my hand out when the door opened and I push it back to be bound.

“Your team had nine more hours. I think we should give them an update.” The unsub says as he walks in. He moves the board so I was in front of the camera. He turns it on and smiles. “We’re backkkk.” He tells them. I could see the team and I started to cry softly. I missed them so much. I was suppose to graduate today and finically join my team, my family. “As you see Gwendolyn's all safe and sound.” 

“You hurt her!” Rossi says, standing up. I smile at the protective tone in his voice. 

“Oh yes. I never told you that she wouldn't be hurt.” The unsub says. “So are you guys any closer to finding me?” He asks them. 

“Walter!!!” I hear some woman yell. I could see light and it looked like we were in a shelter under a house. 

“Woman! I am hurting our daughter right now!” The man, Walter, yells back. 

“We need you up here right now. Jasmine is running!” The woman yells and leaves, slamming the door as she leaves. 

“Shit!” Walter says and runs out of the room. 

I look at the camera and start crying. “Gwen I need you to shake your head yes or no to my questions, do you understand?” Hotch asks me. I nod and look at them. “Are you in a house?” I shake my head. “In a barn?” I shake my head. I try to point down and move my hand. “Down?” I nod. 

“Underground?” Rossi asks. I nod frantically. “He might have her under the house. Some houses in the out skirts of D.C. are old farm houses that still have those tornado shelters under their house. It would have to be an old house though.” 

“Penelope are you getting all of this?” Hotch asks. 

“Yes sir. And with the name Walter, I get three names.” Penelope says. “Are you getting where the video is coming from?” 

“Yes. I'm almost there.” I hear Kevin’s voice and I start crying harder. “Got it!” He said. “We are coming from you Gwendolyn!” 

“All of it is sent to your phones.” Penelope says and hangs up. 

“Okay Gwen. Don't let on that we are coming for you. Let him believe what ever he wants but don't let him know we are on our way. He might kill you.” Hotch tells me and I nod. 

The door opens and Walter comes back down but Hotch ends the feed before he gets down by the camera. Walter looks at the screen and frowns. “Did I turn that off?” He asks me. I nod. I look at his shirt and see there was blood all over it. I start shaking and look away. “Damn bitch thought she could leave us.” He tells me. He makes me look at him and he shows me the head of a young girl and I close my eyes. “This is what happens when you try to run. But you won't try that will you sweetie?” I shake my head. “Good girl.” He lowers the board and smiles. “Get some sleep. I need you all and awake for when I sell you.” He tells me and leaves. 

I close my eyes and try not cry to hard. If I cry too hard then the collar shocks me. I keep myself calm by closing my eyes and thinking of my wonderful family. They really did care about me. After a while, I hear some gunshots. I open my eyes and start to get worried. What if someone from the team got hurt? I start to move my hands to try and get out. Like hell of I was going to sit here while my team could be getting shot at. I manage to get one my hands out and I move to try and get my other hand out when the door opens and I freeze. I see lights and as soon as I see Rossi I start to wave my hand. He sees me and runs over. “Clear.” I hear Hotch say. 

“Oh Gattina.” Rossi says as he removes the other rope on my hand. I sit up and hug him tightly. He hugs me back. “I need you to sit back so I can take that stupid collar off of you.” He tells me softly and I nod. I move back and look at him. “I need help over here!” He calls to the team. 

Morgan and Spencer run over, putting their guns away. “What do you need?” Morgan asks. 

“Morgan, I need you to find some water. I think we have some in the back of the cars. She is going to need water right away.” Rossi tells Morgan. Morgan nods and runs out. “Spencer. I need you to take her feet out of the binding. Do it slowly. I need her still when I take off the collar.” 

“Got it.” Spencer says and moves to my feet. 

“Gattina. I need you to look up and keep looking up until I say okay, got it?” Rossi asks me. I just look up and sigh. I feel Spencer working at my feet and Rossi working at my neck. I feel my feet get freed and I smile. After a minute, I feel the collar get removed from my neck and Rossi says okay. I look at him and look at the collar. “Do you want to try and talk?” Rossi asks me. I shake my head and look away. “That's fine. Let's get you to the ambulance.” He says and picks me up. I lean into him and close my eyes. “I got you Gattina. 

SRSRSRSRSRSRSR 

I was taken to the hospital but I didn't need any surgery luckily. I have cuts on my arms and the stab wounds on my thighs. Those and my neck were the only physical things wrong with me. I was able to rest in a nice bed but I couldn't fall asleep. One they put me on the bed, I grabbed the blanket and curled up. I didn't want anyone touching me. I didn't want anyone looking at me. I just wanted to be alone.


	13. Chapter 13

-Spencer’s POV-   
The team was sent to the waiting room. Hotch called Penelope and Kevin to have them come. They had arrived a couple of minutes ago. Hotch was filling them in. I was pacing and trying not the think about how we found Gwen. Rossi was sitting there with his head in his hands. I walk over and sit by him. “She is safe.” I tell him, trying to comfort him and myself.   
“She was tortured Reid. That man put a dog collar on her so she wouldn’t talk. He made her scream just to have the collar hurt her.” Rossi says and gets up. “That man who says that he was her dad.” He looks at Penelope. “Did you find out if that guy was her real father?”   
“I gave some of Winnie’s DNA to the ME and they are going to compart it to Walter and the woman that we found at the site.” Penelope tells him.   
“We will find out in a couple hours.” Kevin tells him.   
“Okay, thank you.” Rossi says.   
The doctor comes out and smiles at us. “She will be fine, physically.” She tells us.   
“And mentally? Emotionally?” Rossi asks.   
“We aren’t sure yet.” The doctor says. “She let us examine her but after we told her that we were done, she curled back up into a ball and hasn’t said anything. She will be able to talk. Right now, it will be a little hard, but she can talk. It’s another story if she even wants to.” She tells us.   
“Can we go back?” I ask.   
“Only a couple people. She wrote down the name Rossi, is anyone here by that name?” The doctor asks.   
“I’m David Rossi.” Rossi says and goes over to the doctor.   
“One more person can come. Maybe a boyfriend or a really good friend?” The doctor asks.   
“I’ll go.” Kevin and I say.   
“Kevin should go.” Morgan says and looks at me. I nod and Kevin goes by the Doctor.   
“You all will be able to see her later.” The doctor tells us and leads Rossi and Kevin away.   
I sit down and sigh. Morgan moves over to my side. “She is going to want to see him.” He tells me. “He is her boyfriend.”   
“I know.” I say and look away.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Gwen’s POV-   
I was curled up on the bed, waiting for them to get Rossi. I needed to know what happened. Did anyone get hurt? Where was Walter and that woman? Were they going to take me again? I knew once Hotch came in here, I would have to tell him what happened and I didn’t want to deal with that right now. I needed Rossi. The doctor comes in, Rossi and Kevin following behind her. I was happy that they gave me a girl doctor. I don’t know how I would react around any unfamiliar men.   
“Gattina.” Rossi says and sits by me. “Oh my sweet Gattina.” He places a hand on my cheek and I close my eyes and lean into it. “You had us worried but you did so well sweetie.”   
I open my eyes and frown. “W…” I try to say but it hurt too bad so I just shut my eyes. I was also waiting for my shock.   
“You can talk sweetie. You won’t be shocked.” Rossi tells me. I open my eyes and nod. I move my blanket away and place a hand on my throat. “Do you want water?” I nod. Rossi looks at Kevin. “Do you mind going and getting a water?”   
“Not at all.” Kevin says and smiles at me. I smile softly and look down. He leaves the room.   
“Do you know what happened with the unsubs?” Rossi asks me. I shake my head. “Well when we got there, the man, Walter, was pointing a knife at a little girl. Couldn't have been much older than six. He was yelling at her for something. So we break in and tell him to put his knife down. Of course he doesn't listen because what unsubs do? He grabs the girl and puts the knife up against her neck. He threatens to kill the girl if we didn't leave.” Rossi tells me. He sighs and looks at me. “So Spencer tries to talk him down, asking about why they took you. Walter tells us that his wife, Marge, had you and they figured that they had enough girls. I guess that they had six already. Marge wanted a boy and so she was going to kill you. Walter convinced her not to and to just leave you at a hospital. Walter requested that they name you Gwendolyn. So that's what they did but Walter had never stopped watching you. He said that he followed you throughout your life until you moved to New York. He tried to convince Marge to move there but she didn't want Walter to watch you anymore. She was getting jealous of all the attention he was giving you. So when your name was in the paper for the accident, Walter knew you were back in the area. He said that you looked so much like Marge that he needed to find you. So he tracked up you, found out somehow that you were meeting Director Cruz and he got you. When he was done telling his story, Spencer told him that we aren’t got you back and that you were safe from them. He told us that he didn’t believe him because you said you would stay there. He told us that we were trying to ruin his perfect family and came at us with the knife. Spencer shot him and he died on the spot.” He finishes his story.   
I nod and sigh. A huge stressor had just been lifted off my chest. That man was never going to come by me again. I look at Rossi and try to mouth Marge. “Marge?” He asks and I nod. “Oh we caught her trying to run away. She is in jail.” I nod and Kevin comes back with my water. He goes to the other side of me and offers me the water. I slowly sit up and wrap my blanket around my stomach and legs. I take the water and take a sip of it. I sigh and close my eyes. The water was so refreshing and helped my throat, even if it was just a little bit.   
“How are you doing Gwendolyn?” Kevin asks softly. I look over to see him sitting there. I set my water down and take his hand that was resting on my bed. I smile softly at him and he smiles back. “You are still okay with me calling you Gwendolyn, right?” He asks. I think about it and sigh. I nod and look at the ceiling. I hate that that man called me Gwendolyn. I can’t let him tamper with the love I have for my name. I love hearing that name come from Kevin and that man wasn’t going to stop me from loving it.   
I sigh and look at Rossi. I pretend to write on my little desk I have. “You want to write?” I nod. He gets up and smiles. “Okay Gattina. I’ll be right back.” He heads to the door and stops. “I know some more people who want to see you out there, can I also bring them?” I nod and look down. “Okay, I’ll be back.” He says and leaves the room.   
Kevin moves his car up closer and smiles at me. “Hey.” I wave to him and smile softly. “Are you tired? I know the others will be okay if you are too tired to see them?” I shake my head. “Okay.” He says and clasps my hand in his two. “I missed you so much.” He says softly. I nod and point to myself. “You too?” I nod and he grins. He stands up and kisses me softly and I kiss back. I was so happy to have Kevin in my life. He was gentle and kind, everything I need in a boyfriend.   
The door opens. “Oh sorry.” I hear Spencer say. I pull back and blush, looking down. “Should we come back later?” He asks, sounding a little angry. I look up and see him glaring at Kevin. I frown and shake my head. He comes in and sits in Rossi’s seat and smiles at me. The others walk in and circle around my bed.   
Rossi comes in and hands me a pen and pad of paper. I point to his chair and frown. “Spence can I sit back down by her?” Rossi asks. Spencer looks at me and nod. He gets up and stands by the others. Rossi sits down and takes my hand. I smile softly at him and write ‘thank you.’ With my other hand. I show it to him and he smiles. “Anything for you Gattina.”   
“Gwen, we will need to ask you some questions later. When you can talk more, is that okay?” Hotch asks. I nod and smile softly. I write ‘I figured I would’ and show him. “That is for a later date though.”   
“Winnie, you had us all worried.” Penny says and smiles at me. “I’m so happy that you are safe and back with us.”   
“I agree with that.” JJ says.   
“We were going to come see you sweet stuff, you didn’t have to get taken to get us to you.” Morgan jokes and I giggle softly. I was happy to be able to laugh about this. “I got a giggle!”   
The team stays for most of the day. I was getting tired and the doctor brought me my pain meds and I was almost asleep when most of the team left. Rossi, Spencer, and Kevin were all that remained. I yawn and watch Rossi talk with the two men. “Go to sleep Gwendolyn. We will be here when you wake.” Kevin tells me. I nod and smile at the three and then fall asleep.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Spencer’s POV-   
After Gwen fell asleep, Rossi and I talked softy. Kevin tried to add in stuff but I was ignoring him. After a while, Rossi gets up. “I’m going to dinner. Do you guys want to come or want me to bring something up?” He asks.   
“Can you bring me something.” I ask him.   
“Sure thing. You too Kevin?” Rossi asks. Kevin looks up from Gwen and nods. “Okay be back soon.” He says and leaves.   
“Kevin, we need to talk.” I tell him.   
“I don’t care what your feelings are. I am with Gwendolyn and I won’t let you take her from me.” He says, looking at me.   
“You aren’t right for her.” I say, crossing my arms. “She is going to be doing some dangerous things when she starts coming out to the field and she is going to need someone to understand what she is going through to help her.”   
“Just because you finally released what a great girl Gwendolyn is, does not mean that you get to just say, oh I want her so she is mine.” Kevin tells me.   
“She will need someone who understands.” I tell him.   
“And I will understand her. She doesn’t need someone who is in the field with her.” Kevin says. “Don’t you think that would make it harder for her. Trying to not worry even more about you. That could put her in even more danger.”   
“I think I’m what she needs right now.” I tell him.   
“I don’t care what you think. The only opinions I need are Gwendolyn’s and mine. And maybe Rossi’s.” Kevin says. “And don’t you think it is a little strange that you suddenly want Gwendolyn when she is in danger? Not when she is sitting at the computer helping you guys. Or is it that she is a little more athletic? Now she is your type of girl? You say you don’t care that she is a curvy woman, but really you wanted her skinner. Is that why you finally decided to pick her. Well too bad. I don’t care what she looks like or what she is doing every day at work. I want Gwendolyn for who she is and how she makes me feel and I won’t give that up unless she tells me she is done.” He tells me.   
“NO!” I hear Gwen yell and she starts thrashing around. Kevin rushes to her side and I do the same. “Please stop…” She says softly, her voice still scratchy. Her pled was heart wrenching.   
“Gwendolyn. It’s Kevin. Sweetie. You are safe.” Kevin says softly and rubs her arms. “Wake up love.”   
“D…Don’t touch me.” She says softly, still in her nightmare.   
“Sweetie, wake up.” Kevin keeps saying and she opens her eyes. “Hey there love. Are you okay?” She shakes her head and moves into his arms. He frowns and holds her.  
“I’m back.” Rossi says as he walks in. He looks at Gwen and frowns. “What’s wrong Gattina?”   
“She had a nightmare.” Kevin tells him.   
Rossi nods. “Gattina, can you look at me?” Gwen nods and slowly removes herself from Kevin’s arms and looks at Rossi. “Remember that necklace I gave you?” He asks.   
“I…dropped it.” She whispers.   
Rossi nods and pulls something out of his pocket. “I know. It was what made us release you were taken.” He tells her. He holds out a necklace and Gwen smiles. “I just got it back from Penelope.”   
“Is she here?” Gwen whispers.   
“No. She gave me some news and the necklace and then had to go back to the office.” Rossi tells her. “Want me to put your necklace back on you?” Gwen nods and turns around. She holds up her hair and I can see red marks all around her throat. Rossi puts it on her and she leans back in bed. She smiles softly and plays with the cat charm. “Are you okay Gwen?” She nods, looking down. I wish I knew what she was thinking of. I wish I knew how to help her.   
“Home?” She whispers.   
“You have to at least stay the night.” Kevin tells her. “I’ll stay with you if you want.”   
She shakes her head. She writes something and then shows us. ‘You guys head home. I’ll be fine.’   
“I want to stay.” Rossi tells her. She shakes her head. “Please Gattina.” She shakes her head again. He sighs and stands up. “Okay. I’ll be back in the morning.” He places a brown paper bag on her table. “I got you chicken noodle soup. Please eat it.” She looks at him and nods. “Thank you. Get some rest.” She nods again and smiles softly at him. “You boys ready?”   
“I’m going to say bye to her. I’ll see you two tomorrow.” Kevin says.   
Rossi nods and looks at me. I nod and walk to Gwen. “I’ll be back tomorrow. Text me if you need anything.” I tell her and smile. She nods and smiles softly back. I look at Kevin and then follow Rossi out. We were almost to our cars. “Do you think Kevin is right for Gwen?”   
“I think he is what she needs right now and you two fighting for her won’t help at all.” He says and turns to me. “She likes Kevin and she will stay with him until she doesn’t, but don’t try and change her feelings. I like you Reid and I think you are a great guy. I would be okay if Gwen ever wanted to date you, but if you do anything to break them up before she is ready, then you will have me to worry about.” He says and I nod. “Don’t rush things. Just be her friend. She needs that from you and friends support their friend’s relationships.” He tells me and then gets in his car.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Guess what? I finally got the rights to Criminal Minds. I'm rich! Oh wait, that is just my daydream. That's why Spencer Reid was my boyfriend.   
> Well I guess I still don't own Criminal Minds. I do own Gwendolyn! Yay.

-Gwen’s POV-   
It had been three weeks since I was released from the hospital. Hotch wasn’t letting me even think about coming back to the BAU for at least a month. It was nice to just let myself heal and not worry about going back to work. Rossi had been over more than what was needed but I didn’t mind. I liked having him worry about me. It made me feel safe. I knew that I could call or text him and he would drop mostly anything and come over. The only thing that stopped him was really work. When he was on a case, I wouldn’t bother him because I knew it would just bug him until he could come back. Kevin was a great help also. He was always at my house and he was helping me with my vocal training the doctor gave me. I had most of my vocal range back. I still got nightmares but my Rossi and or Kevin would come over and stay with me. It was getting better. We found out that those people were not actually my parents. The day Rossi told me was one of the best days of my life. We found out that they had a daughter who had been take on that road thirty years ago and they were trying to replaced her. Once they found out that I was an FBI agent, the female thought they could get money for me. The male wanted to just wanted to kill me and hide the body. Penny was coming over that day after work and I was going to see if she could find my real parents.   
I hear a knock on the door and answer it. “Hello Penny.” I say softly.   
“Hey Winnie. Bad day for your voice?” She asks as she walks in.   
I shut the door behind her and smile. “Yeah.” I say. I still had bad days when my throat was little more sore. I just wouldn’t talk as much and the team understood.   
“Well then I just have to talk for both of us.” She says and I giggle.   
“I have a favor to ask of you.” I tell her as we sit down.   
“Anything for you.” She says and smiles.   
“Could you find my real biological parents?” I ask.   
“You want to know them?” She asks me. I nod slowly. “I can try. Why don’t you do it? You know almost as much as I do. You could do it.”   
“If I do it, I won’t do it.” I tell her.   
“Ah, I understand.” She says. “I will get back to you when I know something.”   
“Thanks.” I tell her and smile.   
“Did Rossi tell you about his bar?” Penny asks me.   
“What bar?” I ask. “He has never told me about any bar.”   
“He hasn’t told his little Gattina about his bar? The one he met Carolyn in?” Penny asks.   
“Okay, one you just called me his little little cat, and two, no! Why am I just now hearing about this bar?” I say and pout.   
“He is probably going to tell you soon.” Penny says. “It’s called the Benjamin and it is closing down. It’s last open night is tonight.”   
“I’m glad Rossi is getting back today so he can go one last time.” I say.   
“Well I kind invited the whole FBI so you better go get ready so we can go.” She tells me.   
“Penny, you can’t spring this on me at the last minute.” I tell her as I get up. “You are the worst.”   
“You love it.” She says as I walk to my bedroom. I just groan at her.   
I come out to the living room a half an hour later and see Kevin standing with Penny. “Kevin. You’re here.”   
“Yeah, Penelope told the whole FBI to come tonight and she told me to stop here so we could go together.” He tells me.   
“Penny, you are the best.” I tell her.   
“Oh but I thought I was the worst.” She says and smirks.   
“Who is driving?” I ask.   
“Well I’m drinking tonight, so not me.” Penny says.   
“I’ll drive sweetie.” Kevin says as I grab my coat and bag.   
“Sounds good to me.” I say and we all head out the door.   
We get to the bar and I look around as we walk in. “So Rossi met Carolyn here.” I say.   
“That’s what he says.” She says. “And there he is.”  
I see Rossi with the team and I grin. This was my first outing since I was released from the hospital. “Oh my gosh is that David Rossi? The man who helped create the BAU?” I say behind him.   
He turns around and grins. “Gattina. What are you doing here?” He asks.   
“Penny told me about this. Why have you never brought me here? I heard from a little birdy that this where you met the famous Carolyn.” I say and cross my arms. “I thought I was your Gattina.”   
“You are sweetie. I’m sorry but I just never got the time.” He says and puts his arm over me. “You were here and we were getting to know each other and then you are training to be an agent and then you leave me for five months to train and I just never got the chance.” He explains.   
I smile and rest my head on his shoulder. “I understand Rossi. Now show me where you caught the eye of Carolyn.”   
Rossi walks me around the bar and tells me how he met Carolyn here and how she, him, and Ringo got to know each other. We get back to the group and I hug some of the people I haven’t seen in a while.   
“Spence, tell Gwen what you did today.” JJ says.   
“What did you do?” I ask, looking at Spencer.   
He looks at me and smiles. “I delivered a baby.”  
“No way!” I say and laugh. “Now there is a story there.”   
“I’ll tell you about it later.” He tells me.   
“I’m holding you to that.” I tell him and feel an arm move around my waist. I look over and see Kevin looking at me. “Hey. I got the tour from Rossi. Did you hear that Spencer delivered a baby?”   
“No I didn’t.” Kevin says. “Is there anything you can’t do Dr. Reid?”   
I look at Kevin and frown. “What is with the hostility?” I whisper to him.   
He looks at me and sighs. “Sorry sweetie. I just hear all about Spencer’s great accomplishments at work with my team. Your team is the talk of the FBI some times and I get tired of it.”   
“I’m going to be part of that team soon Kevin. Will you get tired of hearing what I did that day too?” I ask him.   
“No. That’s not what I meant.” He says and fidgets.   
“What aren’t you telling me?” I ask him. “You only fidget when you are hiding something.”   
“Can we go talk somewhere a little private?” He asks.   
I nod and tell the team. We go to a corner booth and sit. “What’s wrong?” I ask.   
“When you were at the hospital, Spencer plainly told me that he thinks that I am not right for you. He said that he was the one right for you.” Kevin explains.   
“He said that?” I ask. I didn’t know what to do with this information. I knew I had strong feelings for Kevin but my crush on Spencer had never gone away. I sigh and look at Kevin. He looked really nervous. I move closer to him and place a hand on his cheek. “We he is wrong. You are right for me.” I tell him, smiling. I didn’t want to ruin what I had with Kevin for a silly crush. I wanted to stay with Kevin. If Spencer liked me, then he would have to deal with it. I did the same thing for him with Maeve and now it was his turn. I was happy with Kevin and wanted to stay with him. I lean in and kiss Kevin softly. “Let’s get back to the group. Rossi is looking at us.” I say with a smile.   
“Sounds good.” He says and we get up.   
“Hey,” I say and Kevin looks at me. “No more hostility.”   
“No more hostility.” He promises.   
We get back so hear Rossi’s name at the karaoke station. “You are singing?” I ask him.   
Rossi glares at Hotch and nods. “I guess I am.” He walks up. “If you think I’m doing without backup you are crazy.” Penny runs up there and grabs a mic. “JJ, Reid.” Rossi says, trying to get them up there.   
JJ and Reid go up there and try and get Morgan up there. “Go Morgan. I need to hear you sing to make my night even better.” I tell him.   
“No way, sweet stuff.” He says.   
The group starts singing and I see Hotch filming them. I giggle and push Morgan up there. At the end of the song, the team takes a bow and come back over. “I’ll get you back for that Hotch.” Rossi says.   
“I’m frightened.” Hotch says and laughs.   
“I’ve never heard you laugh Hotch.” I say and look at him.   
Hotch just glares at me. “And you will never hear it again.” He says so seriously.   
“Okay, wow.” I say and laugh.   
“All drinks are on my Gattina, so go get something.” Rossi tells me.   
“Do they have water?” I ask.   
“I’m guessing they do, but get something special.” Morgan tells me. “It’s your first night out.”   
“I can’t.” I tell them.   
“Why not?” Hotch asks. “I thought your throat was almost all the way healed.”   
“It is, but the carbonation can mess things up. I can’t have pop or any alcohol for at least three months.” I tell them.   
“Oh I’m sorry Winnie.” Penny says and frowns.  
“I promise I’m fine with it.” I tell her. “I really didn’t drink alcohol before anyways.” The team stands there in an awkward silence. “Okay well that ended the conversation quickly.” I say and look down.   
“Sorry sweetie.” Rossi says. “Let’s go sit and we can trade horrible bar stories.”   
We all head to a table and spend the night telling each other about your horrible bar stories.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Spencer’s POV-   
It was the week before Gwen was to come back to the team but I didn’t know if I was ready. I had gone to visit her but that was hard enough. If this was what she had to deal with when I was with Maeve, then she is a rock star on how she dealt with it.   
I knock on Hotch’s office and hear a ‘come in’. I walk in and sit down. “I need time off.” I tell him.   
He sets his pen down and looks at me. “Is it because Gwen is starting back up on Monday?”   
“No. Of course not.” I lie. “I need to see my mom.”   
He sighs. “How much time?”   
I knew he knew I was lying but I was happy that he just chooses to ignore it. “Two weeks? I have the vacation time.” I tell him.   
“I know you do.” He says and looks at me. “Things won’t be better if you run away from your problems.”   
“She is with him and I can’t do anything about it.” I tell him. “I know Kevin told her what happened at the hospital and it didn’t change anything. I just need time to settle with the fact that she is with him.”   
He nods. “I’ll give you a week.” He tells me. “I can’t be down an agent for too long and you don’t need more than that much time.”   
“Gwen is starting so you won’t be down an agent.” I tell him. “Just give me two weeks.”   
“Gwen will be training during her first two months. She won’t be a full fledge agent till she has gone through all her training which includes two months of on the field training. I need you back in a week or you won’t be able to go at all.” He tells me.   
I sigh and nod. “Okay a week. I’ll be back the following Monday.” I tell him.   
“Good.” Hotch says as I stand up. “You should tell her that you are leaving before you go.”   
“Okay.” I say but know I won’t do it. I just can’t face her at the moment.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Gwen’s POV-   
It was my first day back and I get up early and make myself a good breakfast and wait for Kevin to come and pick me up. He wanted to make it special and pick me up for my first day. I hear his car pull up and run down the stairs. I get in his car and smile. “Hello sweetie.” I say and kiss his cheek.   
“You seem happy and excited.” He points out, smiling.   
“I am happy and excited. I’m finally back to being part of the team and I get to be on the field.” I say and grin. “Can we stop for coffee?”   
He hands me a cup and grins. “Already got it.” He tells me.   
“You are the best.” I tell him and give him another kiss on the cheek. “We got to get going if I’m going to be early.”   
He laughs and drives to the FBI. “See you for lunch?” He asks before we spilt up.   
“If I’m still in town and not out on my first mission.” I tell him and smile.   
“Okay text me if you do leave.” He tells me and walks down the hall.   
I walk in and see Penny waiting for someone. “Hey Penny. Waiting for Morgan?”   
She turns around and smiles softly. “No silly, I’m waiting for you.”   
“Aw thanks Penny.” I tell her. She hands me a muffin. “Um thanks.”   
“You need to keep your stamina up now that you are an agent.” She tells me. “I can show you your office.”   
“Sounds good.” I tell her. She leads me to the desk across from Spencer. “Right by Spencer. That is nice.”   
“And I’m right behind you.” I hear JJ say.   
“Yay! I’ll have two helpers to help me settle in.” I say and smile.   
I look at JJ and smile. “Well one helper for the first week.” She informs me.   
I frown. “What do you mean?” I ask.   
“Spence went to visit his mom this week, saying that he hadn’t been there in a long time and needed to make sure she was doing good.” JJ tells me.   
“That’s weird that he picks this week.” I say and look at his office.   
“Gattina.” I hear Rossi say. I look up and smile. “You made it here.”   
“Of course I did Rossi. You all come in early.” I tell them.   
“We were excited for you.” JJ tells me.   
“I can bet Morgan won’t be in for another ten minutes, so you beat him, but that isn’t a hard thing to do.” Penny tells me.   
“Gwen, come in here and have a talk with me.” Hotch calls for me.   
“I better go and see what he wants.” I say and go up to Hotch’s office.   
“Shut the door behind you.” He tells me when I enter. I shut the door and sit down. “So you know that Spencer isn’t here this week so we might look to you to help more than normally asked a new addition.” He informs me.   
“Why did Spencer leave this week? He knew I was starting this week. I just don’t understand why my best friend isn’t here to help me.” I ask Hotch.   
Hotch sighs and looks down. “Gwen, do you want me to be honest with you?” I nod and he looks at me. “He is confused on what he is feeling. He has feeling for you but he can’t do anything about them. He doesn’t want to hurt you so he ran from his feelings.” Hotch explains.   
I look down and frown. “I don’t want to cause him to hurt.” I say softly.   
“He knows that, but just give him this week to figure out what he wants. Don’t reach out to him, let him come to you.” He says and I nod. “Gwen, you are a great girl, but I need both of your heads in the game when it comes to cases. Now I’m hoping that we don’t get any this week so it can be an easy one to start off but that is not how things go around here. Be ready to leave at any time.”   
“I will.” I tell him.   
“Okay.” He looks at me and smiles. “You will be great Gwen.”   
“Thanks sir.” I say.   
“Go have JJ show you how to do paperwork.” He says. “Try and get Spencer’s done.”   
I get up and go to my desk and smile. “What did Hotch want to say?” JJ asks as she walks to my desk.   
“Oh just that he hopes that there won’t be a case this week but to be ready if there is.” I tell her. “He wants you to show me how to do paperwork. I’m dealing with Spencer’s stack.”   
“Well then let me show you the most amazing part of working as a special agent.” JJ says and we get to work.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
It was day three of my first week, and I finally got a break from paperwork for a sexual harassment seminar. I was sitting by Rossi and Kevin, watching Penny being told that her talks were inappropriate. I was trying not to laugh and he face. I was so happy that I didn’t miss this. Penny gets up suddenly and leaves the room. I look at Rossi and he just shrugs.   
Later that day, the team is called into the round table room and I grin. “My first mission!” I say and sit at the table. “I’m so happy.”   
“Well, time to tone it down.” Hotch tells me and starts explaining the case.   
SRSRSRSRSRSR  
We finish the case and are flying back to the BAU. I move by Penny and smile. “You all better Penny?” I ask.   
“Yeah Winnie. I’m better.” She says and leans her head on my shoulder. “I hated calling you Gwendolyn.”   
“I did too.” I tell her and take her hand. “You looked hot as the Black Queen.”   
“I felt hot.” She says and we laugh. She moves her head and looks at me. “I heard that Spencer is back. He is waiting for us at the offices.”   
“He is?” I ask. “No one tells me anything.” I say and pout.   
“Winnie. You need to think about what you want with that boy. We all love you but we also love Spencer. We need you two to work together and be nice with each other.” She tells me.   
“I know and I have thought about it. I am happy with Kevin. I want to stay with him.” I tell her. “I’m going to let Spencer know that we have to stay friends and that is it.”   
“Be careful with him.” She tells me.   
“I will. I don’t want to hurt him.” I say and lean against her. “I hate this.”   
“Me too sweetie.” She says.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
When we land, I get out and try to rush to the offices but am stopped by Kevin. “Hey sweetie. I need to talk to Spencer and then we can go.” I tell him and try to go past him.   
“Gwen…” Kevin says and I look at him and see him frowning.   
“Kevin?” I ask.   
“We need to talk first.” He says and leads me to an empty room. “I love you.”   
My eyes widen and I look at him. “I love you too, Kevin.” I tell and smile. I knew I meant it too. I was super happy with Kevin. I don’t think I could be any happier.   
“And that is why this is so hard.” He says and looks down.   
“What is it Kevin? I’m getting worried.” I say and frown.   
“I cheated.” He says softly.   
At that moment, I could feel my heart spilt in two. “W-What?” I ask and shallow. It was getting hard to do that.   
“Some of the guys from my team went out and I got drunk and kissed some other girl.” He says, trying to explain.   
I look at him and frown. “Why?”   
“I was drunk.” He says.   
“That isn’t an excuse!” I yell. “I need to get out of here.” I say and try to leave.   
Kevin moves in front of the door. “No, Gwendolyn, please let me explain.” He begs.   
“Get out of my way before I kick you.” I tell him, trying to hold my tears in. I was in so much pain but there weren’t visible marks.   
“Gwendolyn…” He says softly.   
“Don’t call me that!” I yell. “Just get out my way!” I feel a tear roll down my cheek. “Please…”   
He looks at me and nods. He moves out of the way and sighs. “I do love you.” He says softly.   
I look at him, feeling the tears fall down my face. “No you don’t. If you did, you would have never hurt me like this.” I tell him and leave the room. I stop walking and close my eyes. I couldn’t go to the offices. Everyone was there and they would want to know what happened. Rossi would go and kill Kevin. I lean against the wall and slide down it. I was in such pain, even more than when I was getting tortured. It felt like my heart was getting ripped out of my chest and it was getting harder to breath.   
“Gwen?” I hear. I look up and see Spencer looking at me, worried. “Gwen! What’s wrong? Where is Kevin?” He asks and rushes over to me. I just start crying harder and he wraps his arms around me. “It’s okay.” He says and rubs my back. After a while, I finally stop crying and just keep taking deep breaths. I keep my eyes closed and keep close to Spencer. “Gwen. Sweetie, what happened?”   
“Kevin cheated on me.” I say softly.   
“What!?” He asks. He starts to get up but I place a hand on his arm.   
“Stay with me.” I ask softly.   
“Of course.” He says and places his arms around me again. “We should go to the offices. The others were worried that you were gone for so long. Penny said that you wanted to talk to me.”   
“I did but not anymore.” I tell him. “I just want to go home.”   
“Rossi won’t let that happen.” He tells me. “Neither will Penny.” I nod and sigh. “Is Kevin still in the building?”   
“Not sure.” I tell him.   
“He better hope not.” He says, standing us up. I nod and he leads me to the offices.   
“Gwen, what’s wrong?” JJ asks when we get closer to the team.   
I see Rossi and run into his arms. “Gattina?” He says, holding me. I start crying and he just holds me. “What happened sweetie?”   
“Do you want me to tell them?” I hear Spencer ask me. I just nod and cry into Rossi’s shirt. “Kevin cheated on her.”   
“Asshole.” Morgan says.   
I feel Rossi tense up. “Penelope, come get Gwen.” He says to Penelope.   
“No Rossi.” I say, through my tears. “Please not tonight.” I plead.   
He sighs and nods. “Not tonight.” He agrees with me.   
“Want to have a movie night?” Penelope asks me.   
I shake my head. “I just want to go to bed.” I say softly, finally stopped crying again.   
“I want you to stay the night.” Rossi asks. “Please.”   
“Just drive me there and I don’t care.” I say and close my eyes.   
“You guys want to come over for breakfast?” Rossi asks.   
“Sure. We will be over there in the morning.” Hotch tells him.   
“Let’s get you to bed Gattina.” Rossi says. “Grab your things and meet me back here.”   
I nod and go to my desk. I pack up my stuff and close my eyes. I felt like I was on auto-pilot right now. I didn’t know what to think or what to do. I just wanted to shut down and sleep for a million years. I guess I was standing at my desk for a while because next thing I know, a hand is on me and I jump and see Spencer standing there.   
“You okay?” He asks me.   
“No.” I tell him.   
He frowns and nods. “Do you need help with your stuff?”   
“No. I’m fine.” I tell him and go back to Rossi. “Ready.” I tell him.   
“Let’s go Gattina.” Rossi says and puts his arm around me. “See you guys tomorrow morning.”   
We get to Rossi’s and I crash in the guest room that I usually stayed in.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still don't own Criminal Minds

The next morning, I just lay in bed. I couldn't get up and didn't want to. I heard the doorbell go off but didn't worry about. I just stare at the wall. It was a nice shade of purple. I start to hear voices outside the door. “How is she?” I hear someone ask.   
“As well as you think she is. We got back and she went into the room and has stayed there.” I hear Rossi tell someone or everyone. I really didn't know how many people were out there.   
“Should we try and talk to her?” I hear JJ ask.   
I sigh and get up. I open the door and frown. “Gattina.” Rossi says. “You’re up. How are you feeling?” I shrug. “Want breakfast?” I shrug again. “Okay. The rest of the team is in the living room. Let's go to them.” He tells me and leads me to the living room.   
I see the rest of the team they say hi to me. I raise my hand to say hi back and I sit in the couch. I bring my knees to my chest and rest my head on my knees. I feel two people move by me and I feel an arm go around me. “How are you feeling?” Spencer asks me and rubs my shoulder.   
“Like my heart is gone.” I tell him softly.   
“Oh Winnie. I'm so sorry that this happened.” Penny says.   
I nod and look up. The rest of the team was either looking at me or looking at the floor. “This is awkward.” I tell them. “Please don't shut down any conversation because of me. Where is the rest of the family?”   
“We didn't know if you would be up for it.” Hotch tells us.   
“I just want things to be normal.” I say. “I want you guys to stop pitying me.”   
“Were not-“ Morgan starts to say.   
“You are.” I tell him. “I'm glad that you guys care about me but I'll be fine. It's my first heart break. It will happen again and I just want you guys to know I can handle it. I'm not some doll that will break when something bad happens.”   
“We just want to make sure that you are okay Gwen.” Spencer says.   
“And I'm fine with that but I don't want pity. I want things normal.” I say and lay my head back down.   
“I'll tell Will to come here and pick up Jack on the way.” I hear JJ say.   
“Sounds good.” Hotch says.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR   
We had a semi-normal breakfast with the team. Only Penny and Spencer hovered over me. I knew they did because they cared for me but it was getting annoying. The young boys went outside with Hotch, Rossi, and Morgan to play soccer. I went out and sat on the patio with JJ, Penny, and Spencer. Blake had to leave to go see her husband.   
“Spence why don't you join the other boys and play soccer?” I ask Spencer and smile softly.   
“Oh you are funny Gwen. So funny.” He says and glares at me.   
“Fine, I'll take your place.” JJ says and goes and joins the game.   
“I need to take video of this.” Penny says and gets up.   
I smile softly as I watch most of the team act like kids. “This family is crazy.” I say.   
“Of course we are. You are too.” Spencer tells me. I stick my tongue out at him. “There's my Gwen.” He says softly.   
“I told you guys I just needed normality.” I say.   
“Did you call me Spence?” He asks a minute later.   
“Finally catch that.” I say and look at him. “Fought I would try it out. What do you think?”   
“I like it. But I get to call you by a different name.” He says.   
“Okay? What do you want to call me?” I ask.   
“Well I'm guessing that Gwendolyn is out of the picture.” He says. I nod and look down. “What about Lyn?”   
“Why the change?” I ask.   
“You called me Spence.” He says.   
“But that doesn't mean you have to change what you call me.” I say.   
“I felt like it.” He says and shrugs.   
I laugh softly and lean back in my chair. Being with my family almost made me forget why they were even here, almost. “So how was your visit to your moms?” I ask after a minute.   
“It was good. She told me that I was still too skinny.” He tells me.   
“I agree.” I tell him. “Just come to my house for dinner and I can change that.”   
“I might take you up on that.” He says and smiles at me. “The visit served its purpose.”   
“Oh? And what was this almighty purpose?” I ask.   
“To clear my head and realize what I really want.” He tells me.   
“And what do you want Spence?” I ask him.   
“Not saying yet.” He tells me.   
“No fair.” I say.   
“Tell me what you were up to in those five years that the FBI can't find and I'll tell you.” He offers.   
“No deal.” I say and close my eyes. Why was everyone wanting to know what I did for five years? It wasn't like I was a secret agent. I was just a little kid who left the system. It wasn't like they could go back in time and adopt me or something.   
“So what were you going to talk to me about?” He asks.   
“When?” I ask, looking at him.   
“Yesterday before the thing happened.” He says.   
“Oh yeah.” I say. “Never mind.”   
“I want to know Lyn.” He tells me.   
“I don't want to tell you.” I say.   
“Oh come on Lyn.” He says and looks at me. “Just tell me.”   
I glare at him. “You really want to know? I was going to tell you that I didn't want you to look at me in anything more than a friend. That that I was happy with Kevin and that I love him.” I tell him, getting up. “Is that what you want to hear?” I ask him and rush into the house. I go to the kitchen and eat some of the leftover bacon. Why couldn't he just let it go? I let his thing go but he couldn't let mine go.   
I see Spencer move into the seat next to me. “I'm sorry…” he says. “I keep messing up with you.”   
“You really do.” I tell him with a small smile. “You just need to listen to me.”   
“I really am sorry.” He says.   
“I know you are Spence.” I say and lean against my head against his shoulder. “What did I do wrong?”   
“What do you mean? I'm the one who messed up.” He asks.   
“No what did I do for Kevin to cheat on me?” I ask.   
“Lyn… you didn't do anything wrong. He is the one who messed up.” Spencer says.   
“People don’t just wake up one day wanting to cheat. He must have been thinking of breaking up with me to want to cheat. He was looking for a way out.” I say.   
“That is possible, but that doesn't mean that you messed up.” He tells me. “That just means he is a loser. Because anyone who even thinks about breaking up with someone as amazing as you has to be stupid.”   
“You're just saying that.” I say and close my eyes. “I must have does something to make him change his mind. Did I tell you that he said he loves me before he told me about him cheating?”   
“He did what?” He asks. “Did… did you, um, say it back?”   
I nod. “Because I do love him.” I say softly.   
“I'm sorry Lyn.” He says and runs my back. “But it's his lost.”   
“I might believe that one day.” I say softly.   
“What are you two talking about in here?” I hear Rossi ask us, coming up from behind us. He sides down on the other side of the bar and takes some bacon.   
“I had a minor freak out.” I tell him. “I was telling Spence about what all happened with Kevin.”   
“Oh I want to hear this too.” Rossi says.   
I sigh and sit up. “You won't like it Rossi. You are doing that protective dad thing perfectly.”   
“But that is why I was to hear. I need to know how I should go and hurt that spineless squid.” Rossi says.   
“I'm not telling you.” I say.   
“Reid. You tell me then.” Rossi says and turns to Spencer.   
Spencer looks at him and then me. “I have to leave that up to Lyn.” He says and smiles at me. He stands up. “Maybe I will play a game of soccer.” He says and leaves the kitchen. I look at Rossi and frown. “I don't want you to go after him.” I tell him.   
“Why not? He hurt you so I hurt him.” He says.   
“No. I can handle things myself. I'm not a doll that will break if someone hurts me!” I tell him.   
Rossi frowns. “I know that Gattina. But I just want to protect you. I don't have any biological children but Gwendolyn, I see you as my daughter.” He says and hold my hands. “I was going to as to ask you this later but I was wondering if you would want to become my adopted daughter?” He asks, looking worried.   
“You want me to be your actual daughter?” I ask. “Me?”   
“Oh course Gattina. I already see you as my daughter but this way it is legal.” He tells me.   
I tear up and smile. “You can still adopt me?” I ask.   
“I had Aaron look it up and it is possible. You would have to move in here for at least two years and then we could do it.” He tells me.   
“You want me to move in with you?” I ask.   
“Yeah.” He says and smiles. “I know it's a lot of time and I know it's weird to live with an older person but if you are up to, I want to do this.”   
“You want to deal with me for two whole years?” I ask, tears running down my face.   
“Oh course sweetie. You are one of the best things in my life and you haven't even been here that long. I knew the minute I saw you, I knew I wanted you to be part of my family.” He tells me.   
I get up and go over to him. “I would love to be your daughter Rossi.” I say and hug him. “Or should I say dad.” I laugh.   
“Whatever you want to call me Gattina is good for me.” He tells me.   
I move back and sit in the seat next to him. “So will Hotch be our layers?” I ask.   
“Of course.” He tells me.   
“So can't he just fib and have you adopt me sooner?” I ask, smiling.   
He laughs and shakes his head. “We need to do this honestly sweetie so it's binding.” He tells me. “You don't want to live with an old man?” He asks me.   
“That's not it and you know it.” I say and laugh. “I just am excited.” I say and grin.   
“Me too Gattina.” He says. “You are going to tell me what that loser said to you one day but I'll let it go for now.” He stands up. “We should go and tell the others.”   
“Sounds good to me.” I say and stand up.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR   
A week later, I had moved into Rossi’s house and it was a nice change. It was weird to live in a mansion it I liked it.   
Rossi comes to my desk. “Want to take a trip with me?” He asks me.   
“Where to?” I ask.   
“LA. I got a strange gift from my Sergeant and I want to go check on him.” Rossi tells me.   
“England! I need you to come to the conference room now.” Hotch says as he walks to the room.   
“Let me go make sure Hotch doesn't need me.” I tell him.   
“No I didn’t know that there was a case. They need you more with me being gone.” He tells me.   
“You need me more than they do dad.” I say. “Okay that was different.”   
“I liked it though.” He says.   
I smile and nod. “Me too. But really they can do it the case themselves. I want to go with you.”   
“No sweetie. You do the case. You are still in training still and need to keep up with that.” He tells me.   
I sigh and nod. “Fine but you better keep me updated and text me when you get there and when you are on your way home.” I tell him.   
“Okay and if you get home before I do, have Garcia or JJ stay with you.” He tells me.   
“Will do. Be safe.” I say and hug him.   
“You too.” He says and leaves.   
“England you are needed in here.” I hear Hotch call.   
“Coming!” I say and head up to the room.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR   
We had finished the case in Ohio and were flying back. I was worried because I hadn't heard from Rossi all day. Once we landed I was going to call him and make sure he was fine. He called the day before saying that he was doing good but he didn't know when he would be back.   
“So Gwendolyn Rossi?” Spencer asks as he sits next to me. He offers me a coffee and I take it.   
“Thanks.” I tell him and take a sip. “I don't know if I will take Rossi’s last name. I mean I call him Rossi.” I say.   
“Yeah, that would be a little difficult for everyone.” He says.   
“I have two years to decide.” I say. “Who knows what I'll be doing in two years.”   
“You better still be on this team.” Spencer says.   
“Maybe.” I say and look at him. “If you are nice to me.” I say and smirk.   
“I'm always nice to you Lyn.” He says.   
I lean against my head against his should and nod. “You are Spence.” I say and yawn.   
“Sleep.” He tells me and moves his arm around my waist.  
“Not tired.” I say as I yawn.   
He laughs. “Liar.” He tells me. “Just sleep. It will make the time move faster.” He says and moves me closer.   
“Fine, you win this time.” I say softly and fall asleep.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
“Lyn. We are back and Rossi is back.” I head Spencer tell me as I come out of my sleep.  
“He is?” I ask, opening my eyes.   
“Yeah. He is by the offices.” He tells me.   
“Thanks.” I say and get up. I head in and see Rossi. “Dad.” I say and run over to him. “You didn’t tell me that you were on your way back.”   
“I know Gattina. My business got done earlier than I thought and got the next flight. I didn’t have a chance to call or text you.” He explains. “Am I forgiven?”   
“Oh I guess so.” I say and hug him. “I missed you.”   
He hugs back. “I missed you too.”   
I hear a cough behind me and turn around to see Kevin standing there. I frown and cross my arms. “What do you want?” I ask him. Just seeing him here broke my heart. I wanted to go run into his arms and say that I don’t care that he cheated on me but I know that was just my broken heart speaking. I was ignoring it.   
“I want to talk to you, Gwendolyn.” He says and walks over to me. “Alone.”   
“No. You lost that right, if you want to say something, you can say it in front of my family.” I tell him. I knew if I went with him alone, I wouldn’t be strong enough.  
“Please Gwendolyn.” He begs.   
“Don’t call me that!” I tell him. “I’m not going anywhere with you.”   
“Why not?” He asks.   
“Because you broke my heart! You don’t get any more access to it or me.” I tell him and tear up. “You cheated.”   
“I was drunk!” He argues.   
“You don’t just decide to cheat when you get drunk. It must have been on your mind or you were thinking of breaking up with me and this is how you did it.” I say.   
“You wouldn’t sleep with me! I was with you for seven months and I barely even got a kiss most days! You are always with this team of yours! I never got you alone time with you except for the couple dates we had!” He tells me. “You don’t know how to have a proper relationship because even your parents didn’t want you! What guy wants a girl whose parents didn’t even want her?”   
I stare at him. “You done?” I ask and he nods. “Good.” I say and punch him in the nose. “I am not a play thing that just does whatever you want! You knew when you asked me to be your girlfriend that I wasn’t ready for anything serious! And it’s your fault that we only had a couple dates. You never wanted to go out!” I continue. “I love this team. They are my family and you knew that when I started to date you. They are the most important people in my life and you could have been part of this but you fucked it up. I know for a fact that a couple of these people helped you when Spence wanted to step in and for the help they gave you, you threw it back in their faces by hurting me. You are such a loser.” Kevin’s nose was bleeding but he was just staring at me. “You know what? Spence was right. You aren’t right for me but I couldn’t see it back then. But now that your true colors are showing, I can tell him that he was right. He is going to love that.”   
“It’s Spence now?” Kevin asks. “What are you screwing him?!” Kevin walks closer to me and I back up.   
“Kevin. I would really think about what your next move is. Everyone here does not like you and you are seriously close to being arrested.” Morgan says.   
“I love you Gwendolyn.” Kevin says softly.   
“I loved you but that is gone now.” I tell him. “Now leave me alone.” He frowns and leaves.   
“Woah Gwen! I think you broke his nose!” JJ says and comes to me.   
“I think I broke my hand.” I tell the group.   
Rossi takes it and smiles. “I should tell you that fighting is wrong but that was amazing Gattina.” He looks at my hand. “I don’t think it is broken but I think we should go check it out.”   
“I’ll go with!” Spencer and Penny say at the same time.   
“Okay well we should go now.” Rossi says.   
“See you guys in the morning.” Blake says and smiles at me. “Gwen, I’ll teach you how to punch property in the morning.”   
“Sounds good to me.” I tell her as Rossi leads me out.   
We get in Rossi’s car, with Penny and Rossi up front and Spencer and myself in the back. I move close to Spencer and lay my head on his shoulder. He holds his hand out. “Let me see your hand.” He says softly. I lay my hand in his and close my eyes. “It looks just bruised. You should be fine.” He tells me and I nod.   
“I can’t believe you punched him Winnie!” Penny say and laughs. “That was so bad ass.”   
“I was just so angry.” I saw. “He was throwing everything I talked to him about right back in my face.”   
“You know you are worthy of a proper relationship, right?” Rossi asks, looking back in his mirror.   
“Yeah. It just hurts hearing someone say that.” I say and snuggle into Spencer’s shoulder.   
He moves my hand onto my lap and wraps his arm around me. “You are perfect Lyn.” He tells me.   
“When did you start calling her Lyn?” Penny asks.   
“The day after Kevin broke up with her. She is started calling me Spence and so I decided that I deserved a better nickname than Gwen because a lot of people call her that.” Spencer explains. He lays his head on mine and I slowly fall asleep. “Lyn. We are at the hospital.” I hear after what seems like just a couple of seconds. I groan and shake my head. “The faster you get out the faster you can go home and go to bed.” He tells me. I lift my head and glare at him. “Oh look at that cute face.” I just groan and get out of the car.   
Rossi wraps his arm around my shoulders and I lean my head on his shoulder. “I want to go to sleep.” I tell him.   
“I know Gattina, but you need to get that hand looked at.” He tells me. I groan again as we walk into the hospital.   
SRSRSRRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
“A fractured hand. Hotch is going to hate hearing that.” Spencer says.   
“I guess I’ll be with you Penny for the next month.” I say and smile at her.   
“Yay!” She grins. “I’m not happy that your hand is hurt but I miss having you in the lair.”   
I yawn and nod. “I miss being in there too.”   
“Time to get you home.” Rossi tells me. He looks at the others. “Do you want to just stay over since it is so late?” He offers.   
“Sleep over!” Penny say and laughs.   
“Sounds good to me.” Spencer says. I smile at him and we all get in the car. I sit next to Spencer again and rest my head. “Go to sleep Lyn. I’ll carry you in.”   
“No way.” I tell him. “I am way too heavy to be carried.”   
“You are not even heavy. Even before training you weren’t that heavy.” He tells me.   
“Nope. Not going to happen.” I say and shake my head. I move to the other seat and rest my head against the window. I knew that I had lost weight but I didn’t feel it or see it. I was still the heavy girl who people didn’t think was a special agent. I wasn’t going to let Spencer carry the fat girl. I would hurt him.   
“Lyn…” Spencer says softly and takes my good hand. “Look at me please.” I sigh and look at him. “You aren’t heavy.” He tells me and smiles.   
“Whatever you say Spence.” I say and go back to looking out of the window.   
We get to the house and all go in. “Just pick a room, it really doesn’t matter which one.”  
“So I can sleep in your room?” Penny asks, joking.   
Rossi groans. “Okay you can’t sleep in my room and possibly Gwen’s room.” Rossi restates his statement. “I’m going to bed. Don’t stay up too late. I’ll make breakfast in the morning. Be down by 7 or you aren’t getting any.”   
“He is serious about that. The first day I was here I got down here at 7:30 and I had to grab a pop tart because he leaves at that time.” I explain.   
“Good night guys.” Rossi says and hugs me. “Good night Gattina.”   
“Night dad.” I and hug him back.   
“Night Rossi.” The others tell him as he goes to bed.   
“Let’s see your room.” Penny says.   
“It’s not that impressive.” I say and lead the two to my room. “It is just a room.” I tell them. “I do like having a queen bed though.”   
“This is nice.” Penny say and smiles. “Are all the rooms this nice?”   
“Well Rossi let me change it up so it was my room but yeah.” I tell her.   
“Then I’m going to bed. See you guys tomorrow.” Penny tells us and then leaves.   
I watch her leave. “I don’t think Penny is ever leaving.” I say and laugh.   
“She really isn’t.” Spencer says and looks at me. “Hey Lyn?”   
I look at him and smile. “Hmm?”   
“You know what Kevin said was wrong, right?” He asks. “You do deserve a proper relationship. And people won’t care that you didn’t have parents. You will find love.”   
I smile and nod. “I do, kind of.” I sit on my bed and sigh. “I mean I know that I could have a proper relationship and be good at it, but my parents did fuck me up. I’ve never seen a good example of being in a relationship or how to act around a boyfriend.”   
“You were a great girlfriend Lyn.” He says.   
“Thanks but it will be a while before I am a great girlfriend.” I tell him. “I’m super tired and if I don’t get to sleep soon I won’t wake up in time to have breakfast.” I say and stand up. We walk to my bedroom door and I open it.   
“You told Kevin that you would tell me I was right. When is that going to happen?” Spencer asks and smirks at me.   
I roll my eyes and kiss his cheek. His smirk drops from his face and his face instantly turns red. “Thanks Spence.” I say and shut my door.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
It had been three weeks since I hurt my hand and I was happy to go back out on the field. It was a little awkward with Spencer since the night I kissed his cheek. We were skirting around each other and I didn’t know what to make of it. I was still hurting from Kevin but my crush for Spencer was coming back strong.   
We were currently on a case in Mississippi. A small little girl was taken and we were trying to find her. “Okay, I want you to talk to Sue, Gwen. Her parents passed away when she was eight and she moved in with Kate and her parents. I you go in and talk to her. She is not telling us the truth and I think you will be able to get her to crack.” Hotch tells me.   
“Okay. I can do that.” I say and go into the interrogate room. “Hello Sue. I'm agent England.” I say and sit down.   
“Have they found Gabby?” Sue asks.   
“I don't think so.” I tell her. “So I hear that Kate’s family gave you a home after your parents passed away. I bet you are happy that they did that.”   
“I guess.” She says and looks away, crossing her arms.   
“You should be. The foster care sucks. Take it from someone who was in it.” I tell her.   
“You don't know what I dealt with in that house.” Sue tells me.   
“What happened?” I ask.   
She looks down. “Just some things.” She says softly.   
“You can tell me Sue.” I tell her and smile softly.   
“Kate had the perfect family. She got everything good in this life.” She says and fidgets.   
“But you didn’t?” I ask.   
“No! My parents died and I had to move in with her and her parent’s! Do you know what her dad did?” She asks me, getting upset. “He would touch me! I hate him!”   
I move to her side of the table. “Sue, just because something bad happened to you, doesn’t mean you can make bad things happen others.” I tell her, getting angry. She hurt this baby girl just to make her cousin upset.   
“I wanted to make her life as bad as mine.” Sue says.   
“You can’t do that to someone!” I tell her. “You are the reason that little girl is missing! You are a horrible monster!” I tell her and she punches me and attacks me. Someone gets her off of me and made her sit down. I go out of the room and Rossi comes to me. “I’m fine.” I tell him and look at Hotch. “I’m sorry Hotch. I just got angry.”   
Hotch walks to me. “That’s what I wanted out of her. You got her to confess and we got information about her. She is a predispose female offender.”   
“And you needed her to get angry to prove she had the rage.” I say, understanding.   
“I am sorry that I sent you in there unknowing. I knew you would get information out of her faster than anyone else.” Hotch tells me.   
I nod. “I understand. I knew what I was getting into when I signed on.” I tell him. “I’m going to clean this up.”   
“Good job in there.” Hotch tells me.   
I walk to the main part of the station and see the team. “Lyn, what happened to you chin?” Spencer asks and walks up to me.   
“Oh that Sue girl punched me. She has a weak punch though.” I tell him.   
He sighs and shakes his head. “You are a danger to yourself.” He tells me. “I don’t see any blood but it is red so let’s go get you an ice pack.”   
“I didn’t throw myself at the danger this time. Hotch wanted me to go talk to her and he knew I could get a response out of her.” I tell him. “And I got it.”   
“The one Hotch wanted?” He asks as we get to a little kitchen. He starts making an ice pack and I sit down.   
“Yeah. He figured I would do it faster than anyone else since we both understood not having parents.” I tell him as he sits in front of me.   
“I swear you get hurt more than anyone else I know.” He tells me and puts the ice pack on my chin. I flinch and close my eyes.   
“I thrive for danger. It’s my …” I say and open my eyes. I see that Spencer moved closer to me. “middle name.” I say softer. He looks at me and smiles softly. “Spence…” I say softly. I could see him come a little closer and I feel myself do the same thing.   
“Pretty boy and sweet thing! We need you!” We hear Morgan calling us and we break apart and look down. Morgan comes into the little kitchen and looks at us. “Did I interrupt anything?”   
I get up and take the ice pack from Spencer. “Thanks for letting us know.” I tell him as I pass him and go to the rest of the team.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
We found Gabby and were heading back to Quantico. I was sitting in the back reading. I feel someone sit on the couch by me. I set down the book and see Spencer looking at the floor. “Hi.” He says softly.   
“Hey.” I tell him. “I don’t want this awkward.” I say and move near him. “Where you going to kiss me?”   
“Someone is blunt.” He says, smiling. He looks up and sighs. “I don’t know. I think it could have gotten to that.”   
I nod. “Spence…” I start.   
He frowns and shakes his head. “You don’t need to explain. You got over me.”   
I lay a hand on his. “That’s not it at all. I have felt something for you but I’m still a mess from Kevin.” I tell him. “Can I have some time to fix myself?”   
He nods. “You really don’t need to fix anything. You are wonderful the way you are.” He tells me.   
I move so I can lay my head on his shoulder, not letting go of his hand. “Thank you.”   
“Anything for you.” He tells me.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me no own Criminal Minds.

A couple weeks had passed since mine and Spencer’s near kiss. I wanted to tell Penny about it but she really couldn’t keep a secret and I didn’t want Rossi to know yet. I walk to JJ’s desk and sit on it. “JJ, can we talk?” I ask her. Most of the team had gone to lunch so the office was empty.   
She looks up and smiles. “Of course.” She says.   
“Okay so it’s been a couple of months since Kevin and I broke up and this other guy and I have been flirting around each other.” I explain. “Well, that guy and I almost kissed and I kind of wanted to but is it too soon?”   
She smiles. “It’s Spence, isn’t it?” She asks.   
“I hate working with profilers.” I say and sigh. “Yes but I don’t want people to know we almost kissed because if they do, they will watch our every move and I don’t know what I want yet.” I explain. “And Penny would kill me if I don’t tell her first.”   
“But you can’t tell Penelope because she can’t keep a secret.” JJ fills in. I nod and pout. “I don’t know what to tell you sweetie. Spence is a great guy. I mean there isn’t a time limit on long you have to wait after a break up. Just follow your heart.”   
“See that’s what the websites said, but my heart is going two different ways.” I say. “Er, my heart is telling me to go find Spence and tell him that I want to be with him and my head is saying to not trust my heart because I did that last time and my heart got broken.” I explain.   
“I understand that sweetie, I really do, but you know you can’t never listen to your heart and you can’t make Spence wait forever.” She says. “How long has it been since you asked him to wait?”   
“Two weeks.” I tell her.   
She nods. “I can see him hold out for longer than most guys since it is Spence, but don’t make him wait too long.” She tells me.   
I nod and get off her desk. “Thanks JJ. That helped a lot.” I tell her.   
“Any time Gwen. I wish you the best.” She tells me.   
I go down to the cafeteria and see Penny and Spencer talking, or more like whispering. I go to them and ask, “What are you guys talking about?”   
They both jump and look at me. “Winnie! You scared me!” Penny says and glares at me.   
“We need to get you a bell.” Spencer tells me and smiles.   
“That would be the talk of the FBI.” I say and sit down next to Spencer. “Oh did you hear about that girl in the BAU who has a cat collar wi…” I slowly stop talking and put a hand on my throat. “No collars.” I tell them. I still wasn’t over my kidnap. I mean I was sane and everything but some things just trigger my thoughts, like talking about collars.   
I feel a hand on my arm and see them look at me worried. “You okay Lyn?” Spencer asks.   
I nod and smile. I put my hand down and look at him. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just a moment. It’s gone now.” I say. “So what were you guys talking about before I came over?”   
Penny looks around and looks back at me. “You can’t tell Morgan.” She tells me and I nod. “We have to take our fitness tests again.”   
“Really? Can you test out or something?” I ask.   
“I don’t think so.” Penny say and sighs. “Can you help us?”   
“Yeah. What do you need?” I ask.   
“Just be someone to say positive things.” Spencer says.   
“I can do that.” I say. “When do you take the test?”   
“In a couple days.” Penny tells me.   
“And how long have you been training?” I ask.   
“Um…” Spencer says and looks down.   
“Twice?” I ask. Penny looks down. “Once?” They give me no response. “You haven’t trained yet? How long have you known about taking the test?”   
“Um… possibly a month.” Spencer says and looks at me. “We kept pushing it off and getting cases.”   
“We are meeting before work tomorrow. Bring workout clothes and meet me at the FBI track at seven o’clock.” I tell them. “If you aren’t there then I won’t talk to you for a month.” I say and get up.   
I head back to the office and Morgan walks next to me. “They freaking out because they have to retake the PFT?” He asks me.   
I look at him. “You know?” I ask.   
“Of course.” He smiles at me. “I already got them written off. Penelope doesn’t go out on the field and Reid has logged enough field time hours to get out of it.” He tells me.   
“I knew they could do that. I thought I read that.” I say. “So why haven’t you told them that?”   
“I’m going to trick them.” He says. “I’m going to show up and tell them that I am their tester and have them do a lot of hard work.” He laughs and looks at me. “Want to help me?”   
“Of course. I’ll make to work them hard in training.” I tell him.   
“You are an evil genius.” He tells me and I just smile.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
I meet Penny and Spencer at the track the next morning. Spencer was in some short shorts and I was happy with the view. “Okay guys. Let’s get a run on. I want you to run the mile as fast as you can.” I tell them. “I’ll even run with you.”   
We start running and Spencer starts to fall back a little. I slow down and look at him. “You are bean pole. How are you so bad at running?” I ask him.   
“I’m… not a… bean pole…” he says as he pants.   
I smile and shake my head. “Bean pole.” I tell him.   
“Eight forty-five.” Penny says as they finish their mile. “That… isn’t good enough.”   
“This is why you train guys.” I tell them. “Oh and the test will have you run a mile and half.”   
“What?” Spencer asks. “I can’t do that.”   
“Let’s run one more.” I say.   
“Okay.” Penny says and nods. “Let’s go. Okay, 1… 2…” She says and then her phone makes a noise. “Oh thank god.”   
“What?” Spencer asks.   
“We have a case.” Penny tells us.   
“Oh thank god.” Spencer says.   
“Okay, I’ll race you to the building.” Penny says and starts running to the building.   
Spencer looks at me and groans. “I hate running.”   
“I know, but you need to be able to run.” I say and walk by him. “How did you pass your entry exam?”   
“They pretty much accepted what I gave them. They wanted me on the FBI that bad.” He tells me.   
“Nice.” I say and smile at him. “I like your shorts.”   
He blushes. “Really?” He asks. I nod and grin at him. “Have you thought about you know what?”   
I nod and look down. “I’m still confused. I’m sorry Spence. I know it’s not fair to you.” I tell him.   
“Lyn, I’ll wait forever if that’s what it takes.” He tells me and I look at him. “I want you to be sure in what you want.”   
“Thank you.” I tell him and sigh. “We should get going or Penny is going to wonder where we went.”   
We head to the building. Penny and I were walking to the round table room and Penny was having trouble walking in her heels. “Why are you wearing heels today?” I ask her.   
“I can’t not wear heals, Morgan will know something is up if I don’t wear my heels.” She tells me.   
I roll my eyes and go ahead of her.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
We finish the mission and get home. Spencer and I were waiting for the PFT instructor and Penny to arrive. I was sitting by Spencer looking at his cut above his eye. “And you say I get hurt a lot.” I say and roll my eyes.   
“You get hurt a lot more than I do.” He says and moves my hands away from his face. He keeps my hands in his and smiles at me. “You were worried about me, weren’t you?” He asks.   
“Of course I was butt head.” I tell him and sigh. “You are my best friend.”   
He smiles and let my hands go. “I get worried about you too.” He tells me.   
“I’m here! I’m not late.” Penny says as she runs to us. She sits down and starts stretching. “What were you talking about?”   
“Us getting hurt.” He tells her. “Don’t you think Lyn gets hurt more than me?”   
“Oh totally.” She says and I stick my tongue out at her.   
“So what to do you wanna bet that we have a jock for an instructor?” Penny asks.   
“He will be a jerk. All these guys are jerks.” Spencer says and I giggle. He looks at me and frowns. “What?”   
“Nothing Spence.” I tell him.   
“Oh here he comes.” Penny says. “He walks like a jerk.” I look over and see Morgan walking over in a black hoodie with the hood up and a FBI hat on to cover his face.   
“He looks like a huge jerk.” Spencer says and then looks closer. “Is that Morgan? It looks like Morgan.”   
“What? No.” Penny says and looks at Morgan.   
“That is Morgan.” Spencer says as Morgan stands by us. “What are you doing here?”   
“I’m your instructor.” Morgan says and takes his hoodie hood off and smiles. “The usual guy got sick, so you got me.”   
“Oh yay.” Penny says, not sounding happy.   
“Why didn’t you just tell me about this? This could have been waived.” Morgan tells them.   
“Told you so.” I tell them and poke Spencer’s shoulder. He just looks at me.   
“But since you didn’t get it waved, we should get started.” Morgan says.   
“Yup.” Penny says and stands up. Spencer gets up and helps me up. They start walking to the field.   
“Um guys, where are you going?” Morgan asks.   
“To run the mile.” Penny says.   
“No the mile and half.” Spencer corrects her.   
“They actually changed it. It’s more than just the mile and half.” Morgan tells them.   
Spencer and Penny just look at Morgan. “How much more?” Spencer asks.   
I watched for the next hour as Morgan made Penny and Spencer do things that they are not ready for. He made them do pushups, pullups, jump rope, run up and down the bleachers, and more. The two of them fall to the ground after an hour of exercising. They were huffing and puffing and totally out of breath. “Oh come on guys. We still have a two mile run.” Morgan says.   
“Two miles!?” Penny asks, looking at him.   
“I thought it was a mile and half.” Spencer says and looks at me.   
Morgan looks at me and just laughs. “I can’t keep it up.” He says to me. “I need to tell you the truth. I kind of already waived your fitness test.”   
“What?” Spencer asks.   
“Think about it, Baby girl, you're not even in the field. And pretty Ricky, you already got enough case hours to qualify.” Morgan tells them.   
I start laughing. “Lyn. Did you know about this?” Spencer asks me.   
“Maybe.” I say through my laughs.   
Spencer and Spencer look at each other. “I’ll get him, you get her. We are going to kill them.” Penny tells Spencer. I look at Morgan and get up. Penny starts to run after Morgan. “I’m going to kill you.”  
I look at Spencer and smile. “You wouldn’t hurt me, would you, Spence?” I ask.   
“I’m going to hurt you.” He tells me and I scream and start running. I could feel him closing in on me and I feel his arm go around me and we fall to the ground and we land on our sides. We are laughing and I lean my head on his chest. “You are dead.” He says to me through his laughs.   
I look at him and giggle. “No, I’m Gwen.” I tell him.   
He groans and just shakes his head. “Did you hurt her?” We hear and look up. Penny and Morgan were standing over us, smiling.   
“Yes. She is dead.” Spencer tells Penny.   
“No, I’m Gwen. I think Spence hit his head and can’t remember me.” I tell the two.   
“You guys are dorks.” Morgan says, shaking his head. “Let’s go get something to eat.”   
“Sounds good to me.” Spencer says and helps me up after he gets up. He keeps a hold of my hand all the way to the restaurant.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRRSRSR  
Spencer and I were at my, Rossi’s, house, watching Doctor Who on a theatre. “This is like the greatest thing ever.” Spencer says and tickles my feet.   
I move my feet and giggle. “Stop that Spence or I might kick you.” I tell him and he rolls his eyes. “And it is the greatest thing ever. I will never get over having a movie theatre at my house.”   
Spencer looks at me and smiles. “Lyn…” He starts to say but both of our phones go off at the same time. He groans and picks up his house. “We have to go in.”   
“We were just there.” I complain.   
“If you two want a ride, you better get a move on it.” We hear Rossi call down to us.   
“We’re coming!” I yell back. I sigh and get up. “Rain check.”   
“Rain check.”   
We get to the BAU and see everyone there. “Does anyone know what the case is?” Blake asks.   
“Nope. The text said to drop everything and come back.” Rossi says.   
“You need some private adult time. I'll watch Henry. No bad guys, no kids, in that order. Go to Mexico. Or the Maldives, maybe.” Penny offers JJ.   
“Cruz?” JJ says.   
I look up to see our director I actually still haven’t officially met. “We should get up there.” Spencer says and we head up to the round table room.   
SRSRSRRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
We setting up the parameters so we could set up communications with the preacher. I was with Spencer and Blake. We start to move and an officer was shot. The rest of us move back behind the cars and the doors. We start firing into the restaurant as soon as we can. I see Blake trying to move the first officer into safety. Next thing I hear is Spencer calling out her name and then I see him get shot. Morgan and JJ had arrived and we all go over to Blake and Spencer. Morgan and I move Spencer to the back and Morgan leans his against a car. Morgan looks at me and then goes back to the shot out. Blake comes back to us. “Go help. I’ve got him.” She tells me. I look at her and nod. I go back by Morgan and JJ.  
We make our way into the building and as we do Morgan gets hit with some bullets and goes down. JJ and I cover ourselves and start to hit the preacher. After a second, Morgan gets back up and is firing shots too. The preacher makes a run for it. “Gwen go back. We got this.” Morgan tells me and I head back to where Spencer was.   
Blake and a medic was by Spencer when I get back to them. “How is he?” I ask when I get there.   
Blake looks up and frowns. “He need to get to the hospital.” She tells me. “He is losing a lot of blood. Where is Morgan and JJ?”   
“They told me to come back.” I tell and kneel on the side of Spencer. “Don’t you dare leave me.” I tell him. They get him on a gurney and start getting him into the ambulance when Morgan and JJ show up. I was standing by Spencer. “Keep your eyes open Spence. I need you to look at me. Let me see those beautiful eyes.” I say to him.   
“Go with JJ and Blake to the hospital.” Morgan tells me when he comes over.   
I nod and look at him. “You get actually shot?” I ask.   
“Yeah, but I’ll be fine.” He tells me. “Go to the car.”   
I nod and go to Blake and JJ. “Let’s get out of here.” JJ says and we get in the car and drive to the hospital.   
I was in the waiting area with Blake, she was sitting and I was pacing. “Is this how it felt when I was in the hospital?” I ask her.  
She nods. “It was and I’m guessing that Spencer was just as worried about you as you are him.” She tells me.   
JJ walks in. “Any news?” She asks. Blake shakes her head and JJ sits. “He would have already read two books by now.”   
“Closer to three.” I say. I start to pace again and ignore the older women. I was so worried that I couldn’t even cry right now. He has to be okay. He has to make it. I need him to make it. If he didn’t make it, then I don’t know what I would do. I know I would be so heartbroken.   
“He wants kids?” I hear JJ say and I freeze. I look at her and see her looking at me. “Could you see Spencer as a dad.”   
“I can. I knew as soon as I saw him with Henry I knew he would be the greatest dad out there.” I say and sit by her. “He is going to be okay, right? I mean he has to.”  
She takes my hands and I realize that they were shaking. “Gwen. He will make it.” She tells me. “You will be able to tell him how you feel.”   
“How I feel…” I say and nod. I finally realized I need Spencer in my life and not just as my friend. I look at her. “How did you know?”   
“How you are acting. You care for him more than just a friend Gwen. Tell that boy when he wakes up.” She tells me.  
Penny walks in and looks at me. “How is he?”   
“Still in surgery.” I say and hug her.   
She hugs me back and rubs my back. “He will be fine.” She tells me. I nod and I sit down.   
“Agent Morgan can have visitors.” A nurse tells us.   
“I’ll stay here.” Blake says.   
“I’m staying.” I say and look at Blake. She smiles softly.   
JJ gets up. “Tell us what is happening as soon as you know.” She tells us.   
“I’ll be right back.” Penny tells me and I nod.   
I look at Blake. “He was protected me.” Blake tells me. “I should have been hit but he blocked me.”   
“Don’t beat yourself over it. I know Spence wouldn’t want you too.” I say. I stand up and start pacing again. “He will be okay.” I say softly to myself.  
SRSRSRSRSRRSRSR  
I guess I had fallen asleep waiting because when I wake up, I see Blake’s face in front of mine. “We can see him.” She tells me. I stand up. “You go ahead; I’ll call the team.” I nod and rush off to Spencer’s room.   
I get to the room and see Spencer lying in bed asleep. I feel my knees buckle and I slowly move to a chair. I start crying and cover my face. “Sweetie?” I hear. I look up and see Penny. “Oh Winnie…” She says and I move to her. I hug her and she hugs back. “He is going to be okay.” She tells me and rubs my back. “He is going to be okay.”   
After I finish crying, I move a chair right by his bed and take his hand. “When you wake up Spencer Reid, you are going to be told how I feel about you.” I tell him and then sit down. I kiss his hand and look at Penny.   
“How you feel?” She asks.   
“Spence and I have been skirting around the fact that we both like each other… When we were on that little girl case, Gabby was her name.” I start and Penny nods. “We almost kissed and I asked him for more time. I needed to make sure I was ready and I’m ready. I like Spencer Reid more than a friend.”   
“Finally.” She says and smiles at me. “I was waiting to see when you would finally tell me. Morgan knew something was up and got Spencer to tell him and Morgan told me and yay!”   
I look at Spencer. “Now he just needs to wake up.”   
Blake walks in a little while later and smiles at us. “Hey.” She says.   
“Hey, how’s the team?” I ask. I was laying my head on Spencer’s bed right by his hand, which I as holding.   
“They are trying to find that woman.” She tells us. I nod. “How is he?”   
“No change.” I say and sit up. Blake sits by me and nods.   
Penny starts getting Daleks out and setting them on his tray. “What are you doing Penny? A Dalek is not what he needs.”   
“Just wait my favorite girl friend.” She says and places the eleventh Doctor and the tenth Doctor on the tray between the Daleks. “There we go. I want the first thing he sees when he wakes up to the Doctors.” She says.   
“No nine?” I ask, placing a hand over my head.   
“No nine, I’m sorry.” She tells me.   
“I am deeply hurt.” I tell her but pull out my ninth Doctor and Rose figurers and place them by the others. “I always come prepared.” I say.   
After a half an hour of waiting, Spencer’s hand starts moving and I stand up. “Spence?” I ask. His eyes open and I grin. “Hey.”   
“Hi.” He says softly and looks at the Doctors and Daleks on his tray. “Hey.”  
“I did that.” Penny says and he looks at her. “Well nine and Rose are Winnie’s but I set them up so they would be the first things you see. I’m fine with them being the second thing.”   
“I’m glad to see you awake.” Blake says. “Thank you so much for taking a bullet for me. I really don’t know how to tell you how happy that you are awake.”   
“I would do it for you again.” Spencer says and smiles softly at her.   
“Are you hungry?” Penny asks and Spencer nods. “Okay. I’ll be back. You guys want anything?” She asks Blake and me.   
“No thanks.” I say and smile. I look back at Spencer and smile. “Hey.”   
“Hey.” He says and smiles.   
“Are you in pain?” I ask.   
“Kind of, but I’ll live.” He says.   
“You better.” I say.   
“I’ll be right back.” Blake says and leaves the room.   
I look at Spencer and grin. “I am so happy that you are awake.” I tell him.   
“I kind of got that, the way you haven’t let go of my hand.” He says.   
I take my hand and look down. “Sorry.” I say softly.   
He takes my hand. “Lyn, look at me.” He says and I look at him. “I wasn’t saying that I didn’t like it.”   
“Oh good.” I say. “Spencer, I need to tell you something.”   
He frowns. “If it is bad news, please save it till tomorrow.” He says and sighs. “I really don’t want to be told that we are going to just be friends right now.”   
“You silly boy.” I say softly and lean down and I kiss him softly. I pull back and smile. “Does that feel like I just want to be friends?” I ask.   
He smiles. “No.” He says. “You are ready?” I nod. “Oh thank god.” He says and I giggle.   
We hear a knock on the door and I turn around to see Blake standing there. “Am I interrupting?” She asks and smiles.   
“No come on in.” I tell her and smile.   
“You know; with a little makeup I could be Boris Karloff.” Spencer says.   
“You will have the best Halloween costume.” Blake tells him.   
“Okay, I’m going to sound stupid, but who is Boris Karloff?” I ask.   
Spencer looks at me like I just kicked his puppy. “He plays Frankenstein’s monster.” He tells me. I give him a blank stare. “Okay movie marathon when we get back.” I nod and smile. Spencer’s face gets a look of worry.   
“Everyone is okay, don’t worry.” Blake says.   
“I’m not.” Spencer says.   
“You've got that furrowed brow.” Blake tells him.   
Penny walks in with a tray and I help move the figures onto Spencer’s tray. “Can you tell these two to go already?” Penny asks Spencer.   
“I’m not going anywhere Penny. I wouldn’t be any help to the team.” I tell her. I look at Spencer. “Unless you want me to go.”   
“No, I would like you to stay.” He tells me and then looks at Blake. “Go help the team.” He tells me.   
“Okay. Call if you need me.” She says and leaves.   
“I got you juice, broth, or Jell-O.” Penny says.   
“Jell-O, my favorite.” Spencer says and takes the Jell-O.   
A while later, Spencer falls asleep and Penny goes to get water for him. I stand by his side and run my hand through his hair. I smile and giggle. I had always wanted to do that. I look up as the door shuts. I see Penny on the phone. She looked panicked. She gets off the phone. “Wake him up.” Penny tells me as she gets the wheelchair and moves it closer to the bed.   
“What? He just got to sleep.” I say, frowning.   
“Please. People in the sheriff’s office are working against us and the main guy is outside. He wants to kill Spencer.” Penny says.   
I nod and shake Spencer softly. “Spence. Wake up. Please Wake up.” I say.   
He opens his eyes and smiles. “Hey sweetie.” He says and takes my hand.   
“Hey, I need you to get in this wheelchair that Penny has for you.” I tell him.   
“Why?” He asks, becoming fully awake.   
“Please don’t ask questions right now. Just get in the wheelchair.” I say. I move to the other side and help him get into it. I look out the window and see an officer talking on the phone. “That one?” I ask Penny.   
“Yeah.” She tells me.   
“His back is turned. Let’s go. You go first with Spencer.” I tell her. We exit the door and she pulls the fire alarm as she goes. I look back and see the man looking at us. “He knows where we are.”   
We wait outside and then are let in some time later. Penny gets on the phone with Morgan, who is on his way, while I push Spencer. Penny gets off the phone and smiles softly. “He is on his way. He says five minutes.” She tells us.   
“Good.” I say as we get back to Spencer’s room. I help him up back in bed and smile. “Safe and sound.”   
“How are you feeling?” Penny asks.   
“Fine. Just tired.” Spence says.   
“Well yeah you need to get some sleep.” She says as a nurse comes in. I move to the end of the bed and mess with Spencer’s feet. “But how can you sleep when they keep poking you.” She says and smiles. “He had his meds an hour ago.”   
“Yeah, post-op antibiotics.” The nurse says.   
“Yeah, he had those, too.” Penny says. I was starting to get a bad feeling. I go and get my gun but I don’t have it. I see all my stuff on the couch and frown.   
“Which ones? Carbenicillin? No, that's not right.” Spencer says, sitting up. “I have a severe reaction to beta lactams. I can't have that.” I start moving over to the nurse.   
The nurse checks Spencer’s chart. “That's not in your chart.” The nurse says and gets ready to put the drug in the IV. Spencer tries to take his IV out and I run to the nurse and grabs his arms. He pushes me away and takes his gun out. “No one move or I’ll shoot her.”   
“We won’t move.” Spencer says. I look up at him and smile softly. “You don’t want her. You want me. Aim the guy at me.”   
“I don’t think so. I have orders to kill you all so why not kill her first.” He says.   
I see Penny pulling Spencer’s gun out of his bag. “Yeah. You want to kill me first.” I tell him. “It will make Spencer be in more pain which be good for your kill.”   
The nurse smiles and nods. “I like you. You could be a good killer.” He says and goes to remove the safety but a bullet hits him and he starts falling towards me. I hurry up and move out of the way.   
I just look at the nurse and then Penny. She looked like she was going into a panic attack. “He's moving. Ok. I didn't know how loud. I can't hear, 'cause my heart feels like it's gonna come out. Can that happen? Physically, can your heart burst out of your chest? And what is this ringing? My ears don't pop for like a week after I fly, and if this is like that, that's gonna drive me bonkers. Am I yelling? Because it feels like I might be yelling.” She says, looking at Spencer.   
“You just saved Gwen’s life.” Spencer tells her. She looks happier at that. “Can you hear me?”   
She nods and looks at me. “I can and that makes it better.” She says. I get up and go over to her. “You are alive.” She says softly.   
“Thanks to you.” I say and hug her.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
The team catches the unsub and Spencer gets released from the hospital. I was walking with him to the plane, holding his hand. “I know how you feel now.” I tell him.   
“What do you mean?” He asks.   
“With me being in the hospital so much, I finally got a taste of it and let me say, I hate it. I never want to see you in a hospital bed again.” I tell him.   
He stops me and wraps his arms around me. “I can’t promise that I won’t end up in the hospital again, but I promise you that I will try my hardest to stay out of them.” He tells me.   
“Okay then I promise the same thing.” I tell him. He kisses my nose and I giggle.   
“Come on love birds. We want to go home!” I hear Morgan calling from the plane.   
“We better go or they will send Rossi after us.” He says and leads me onto the plane.   
I sit down on the couch and pat my leg. “Lay down Spence and get some more sleep.” I tell him.   
He lays down and I run my hands through his hair. “Oh I have always wanted someone to do this.” He says and closes his eyes.   
“And I have always wanted to do it.” I tell him. “Get some sleep.”   
“Will you?” He asks, looking up at me.   
“Yeah. I will.” I tell him.   
We are woken up once we land. “Stay over tonight?” I ask Spencer.   
“No. I think I’m going to head home and sleep in my bed, but if it is okay with Rossi, I can be over in the morning.” Spencer says and we look at Rossi.   
“That’s fine with me. Then I can give you the dad speech.” Rossi says and smiles. “I’ve always wanted to say the speech.” He says and looks at me. “I’ll meet you in the car sweetie. Take your time.”   
“You want a ride Spencer?” Blake asks.   
“I would love one.” Spencer says. “I’ll be right there.” She nods and heads off to the cars. Spencer looks at me. “I want to talk to Blake. She doesn’t seem okay.”   
I nod and wrap my arms around his body. “I understand. You have known her a while.” I say. “Just come over early tomorrow, okay?” I ask.   
“Of course. I’ll be there early tomorrow.” He tells me and kisses me softly. “I’m so happy I get to finally do that.” He says and leads me to the cars. “Tomorrow.”   
“Tomorrow.” I say and get in Rossi’s car.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay guys. I have no idea what I am going to do for my plot now. If you guys could chime in and send me some suggestions, I would love that. I will give credit where credit is due also. 
> 
> I don't own Criminal Minds.

The next day, Spencer came to my house and we were hanging out in the theatre, watching Doctor Who. I was sitting at the end, facing Spencer, with my knees against my chest. I was looking at him. I really didn't know how to act. I wasn't sure if I could touch him or what. It was strange going from best friends to more than that. “Stop staring.” He says, not looking at me. “You are making things weird.”   
I look down. “Sorry.”   
I feel him move over. “I was joking. Sorry.” He says and places a hand on my knee. “Are you nervous?” I nod. “I am too.”   
I look at him. “But why are we? I mean we have always hung out. It hasn't been hard for us.” I say and move so I could lean my head on his shoulder.   
He wraps an arm around my waist. “It's because we are moving into new areas.” He tells me. “But studies, the little there are, have said that a friendship that turns to something else end up being mostly positive.”   
“No numbers in that one?” I ask.  
“Not enough data.” He tells me. “Look at me.” He says and I look at him. “We don't have to act any different. It can be the same way it always has been.”   
“But I get to kiss you.” I say softly.   
“But you get to kiss me.” He says and kiss my nose. I giggle and moves into his side. “This will work out.”   
“Hope so or Rossi will hurt you.” I say with a smile.   
“Ummm…” he says   
“I'm joking now.” I say and look at him. “We aren't good with jokes.”   
“We really aren't.” He says. “I'm still shocked to find out that you have never seen Frankenstein. We have to make a list of movies to watch.”   
“We should make a list. Do you have paper?” I ask, getting up.   
“In my bag.” He tells me. I walk over and open his bag. I frown and take out the book Maeve got him.  
“You still carry this around?” I ask softly.   
“Yeah.” Spencer says softly. “Does that bother you?”   
“Kind of but I know and understand that she is important to you.” I tell him.  
“You don't mind I carry it around?” He asks.   
“I mean I'm not going to tell you what you can and can't carry around with you.” I tell him and put the book to the side and look for the paper.   
“My love for her doesn't change my love for you.” I hear Spencer say, as he sits by me.   
“I know. It's just something that I have to get used to.” I tell him and look at him.   
“Good.” He says and kisses me softly. “Did you find the paper?”  
I look back at his bag. “No but I found your badge.” I say and take it out and open it. “Or Blake’s. Why do you have this?”   
He frowns. “She left it for me.” He says softly. “I think she quit and this is her way of telling me.”   
I wrap my arms around him and hug him. “I'm sorry Spence. I know you were close to her.” I say softly.   
He hugs back and sighs. “I just hate when people leave.” He says.   
“I know you do.” I say and pull back. “I will never leave you.”   
He just smiles and kisses me.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
“How long will I have to stay home?” I hear Spencer ask someone on his phone. We were hanging out at his apartment a couple days later. “Fine.” He says and sighs. He hands me the phone. “It's Hotch.”   
I take the phone. “Hello?” I ask.   
“Hey Gwen. I want you to help Spencer with his time off. I can give you a couple days off to help ease him into it.” Hotch tells me. “Just until Thursday.”   
“Okay. Sounds good.” I tell him.   
“Give the phone back to him.” Hotch tells me and I hand the phone back.   
Spencer takes it and listens to Hotch. “Yes.” He says. He sighs. “I won’t… I promise… Bye.” He hangs up and flops on his bed and groans. “I can’t come back in for two weeks.”   
I sit down by him and run my hands through his hair. “You will be fine. You get me till Thursday. What do you want to do?”   
He pulls me on him and I giggle. “This.” He kisses me deeply and I kiss him back.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSR   
The next two weeks passed fast. It was great to spend time with Spencer alone and I knew when I was at work without him, he was always worried about me. We had some smaller cases, which was good because with Spencer and Blake gone, we weren’t at our full team. I was sad to actually hear that Blake left from Hotch. I mean Spencer and I were sure that she was gone but to hear it officially was sad. I was happy that she was doing something that she loved and was closer to her husband. Hotch was interview a replacement, but it wasn’t going good.   
The day that Spencer was coming back I got to the office early and decorated his desk with Penny’s and JJ’s help. “Thanks for coming in early to help girls.” I tell them as I finish by placing a coffee and a muffin on his desk.   
“Any time. Spencer is so lucky to have you in his life.” Penny says. “I’m going to get some tea.”   
I watch her leave. “I hate that she is not sleeping.” I say to JJ.   
“I hate it too. She isn’t as bubbly as she usually is.” She says. “I need to go grab my stuff from my car. I’ll be back.”   
“See you soon.” I tell her. I sit at my desk and wait for Spencer. I see him holding the door for someone and am surprised to see Kate Callahan. Her and I started talking at the Benjamin’s last night. She had a very interesting job. I walk to them and smile. “Kate?”   
“Gwen.” Kate says and hugs me.   
“What are you doing here?” I ask her as we part.   
“I’m interviewing for the team.” She tells me.   
“No way. I’m super excited now.” I tell her. “I get to see you and Spence at work now.” I say.   
“I should get up to Hotchner’s office.” She says.   
“Just call him Hotch. It’s easier.” I tell her and send her off to Hotch’s office. I turn around and smile at Spencer. “Hey.”   
“Hey.” He says back. I hug him and give him a small kiss.   
“Welcome back.” I tell him and lead him to his desk.   
“Oh whoa! Did you do this?” He asks, smiling at me.   
“I got help from JJ and Penny. I just wanted your first day back to be special.” I tell him.   
He grins at me. “You are so amazing. You know that, right?” He tells me.   
“I think I have heard that from someone.” I say and kiss him softly.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
Kate was a great addition to our team. She was compassionate and strong. We solved our first case and I was so happy that Kate was with us. It was the following week and Hotch called me into his office. “Am I in trouble?” I ask.   
He sighs and shakes his head. “No. I just need to inform you of something before you find out on your own.”   
“What is it sir?” I ask.   
The office door slams open. “You can't be serious!” Morgan says and comes in.   
“Morgan. I am talking to Gwen right now. I think we need some space.” Hotch says.  
“You haven't told her yet?” Morgan asks. Hotch shakes his head. “He is letting Kevin fill in for Penelope.” He tells me.   
I feel my heart drop and look at Hotch. “Really?” I ask softly. He just nods. “Why can't I stay here and fill in. That's why I came here in the first place!” I say and stand up. “I don't want to even see him!”   
“I need you in the field. I asked ever other team if I could get someone else but Kevin is the only one available.” Hotch tells me. “I'm sorry Gwen.”   
I nod and walk out the room. I slowly make my way to the round table room and sit down. The team starts to come and sit down. Spencer sits down by me and frowns. “What's wrong? What did Hotch want?”  
Hotch walks in. “Penelope has to take some personal time.” He tells us, trying to catch my eye but I just keep looking down.   
“Is it those burritos we had yesterday?” Kate asks him.   
“She's fine. Um Kevin Lynch will be standing in for Garcia.” Hotch says and sits down.   
I feel eyes fall on me and I just look at my hands and try to keep my leg from bouncing too much. I have found out that when I'm nervous, my leg bounces. I feel someone grab my hand and I look up. Spencer is looking at me worried. I just shake my head and look down.   
I could hear Kevin telling us about the profile but I could focus on him. I just blocked him out and looked at my hands. “Wheels up in thirty. Gwen can I talk to you?” Hotch asks.   
I get up and look at him. “Not right now.” I tell him and rush to the woman's bathroom. I sit in the little couch they have in there and try to not have a panic attack. Why was he getting to me like this? I had Spencer. I was finally truly happy again.   
JJ and Kate walk in and sit on the side of me. “Gwen… are you okay?” JJ asks.   
I just shake my head. “Who is Kevin to you? I thought you were with Spencer?” Kate asks.   
“I…” I try to talk but I can't make the words. I close my eyes and lean my head down.   
“Can I tell her?” JJ asks me and I nod. “She use to date Kevin. He was her first boyfriend and he cheated on her. He then came back and was getting on Gwen's nerves and some untrue awful things and Gwen punched him in the nose. I'm pretty sure it was broken. It looks like it was broken.”   
“I remember him from the bar night.” Kate says and rubs my back. “I'm sorry that happened to you sweetie.”   
I nod and stand up. “How am I going to deal with him for a whole week?” I ask softly and start pacing.   
I hear people arguing outside the door and rush out. Kevin and Spencer were yelling at each other. “She is my girlfriend!” Spencer yells.   
“I had her first!” Kevin yells back. 

“That doesn't mean she is your possession and that doesn't mean you can talk to her at any point!” Spencer yells. He sees me and goes to me. “Let's get on the jet.” He says and leads to the jet. “I can’t believe Hotch. He could have found someone else or even had you stay and cover. I mean I that would have sucked but it would be better than that jerk coming to our team.” Spencer rants as we get on the jet. I just smile softly at him. He looks at me and frowns. “What?”   
“I love you.” I tell him softly.   
He grins. “I love you too.” He tells me. “Why now?”   
We sit down and I bring my knees up to my chest. “The way you are so passionate about keeping me away from Kevin and how you are mad at Hotch. It’s just makes me realize that I love you. I’ve never had anyone, other than Rossi, who cared this much about me.” I tell him. He pulls me into him and I smile.   
Rossi walks onto the jet. “What was he thinking?” He asks me.   
“I don’t know. I just know I won’t be calling him to get information. I’ll have someone else do it.” I say.   
Hotch gets on the jet and sighs. “Guy. I really tried.” He says. He looks at me and I nod. I could see how much this was hurting him too. “Gwen, I would never hurt you like this. I asked everyone.”   
“I know Hotch. I know that you didn’t want to do this.” I tell him. “I’ll be fine. I just won’t talk to him.”   
“And that is fine.” He says and sits down. The rest of the team gets on and he head on our way.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
I was at the newest crime scene with Morgan and Spencer and my phone goes off. I answer it without looking at the ID. “England.” I answer.   
“Gwen, don’t hang up.” Kevin says.   
I walk a little away from the other two and sigh. “What do you want Kevin? Haven’t you hurt me enough?” I ask.   
“I’m sorry. I never wanted it to turn out like this.” He says softly. “I know I messed up and instead of being a better person, I act like an ass.”   
“You did.” I say.   
“I just want us to be friends.” He says.   
“Never going to happen.” I tell him truthfully.   
He sighs. “Can we at least not hurt each other when we see each other?” He asks.   
“I didn’t start this. You cheated and then you told me that no one would love me.” I say and tear up. “I need you to stop, just stop trying to get ahold of me, stop trying to get me to forgive you, just stop it. I need you out of my life. It hurts too much Kevin. Don’t you understand how much you have hurt me? You were my first love and you cheated on me and then told me that you love me before you tell me. I still have some problems trusting my heart.” I feel a tear run down my face.   
“You are dating smart boy; you can’t have that many problems.” He says, some hostility in his voice.   
“Kevin, you broke me.” I tell him. “I am still a mess from it. I thought I could trust you. Thank god I have Rossi, Spencer, and this team, or I don’t know if I would be here right now.” I tell him. “I can’t have you call me.”   
“We work in the same building. We see each other.” He says.   
“And when that happens, I will turn around and ignore you. Please do the same.” I tell him.   
“I do love you Gwen.” He says softly.   
“I truly believe that Kevin and I loved you.” I say.   
“And I am sorry.” He says.   
“I know you are, but I am not ready to forgive you. I might never be ready and you have to be okay with that.” I tell him.   
He sighs. “I should get back to doing what your boss told me to do. I just wanted to try and make amends.” He says.   
“You do that.” I say.   
“Gwen?” He says.   
“Yeah?” I ask.   
“Are you happy?” He asks.   
I smile. “I am. I got everything I need.” I tell him.   
“Good. I’m happy for you.” He says. “See you around or not.” He hangs up and I place my phone in my pocket.   
I turn around see the boys coming towards me. “You okay?” Morgan asks.   
I nod. “I got some closure.” I tell him and take Spencer’s hand. “We good here?” I ask them.   
“Yeah, let’s go to the police station.” Spencer says and smiles at me softly.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRRSSR  
It was the following Monday after the case and I was waiting for Penelope. She walks in and comes to me. “I am so sorry. I didn’t think they would have Kevin fill in for me. I mean Hotch told me but I didn’t see you and I had to get down to Texas and this thing with Morgan happened.” She tells me and frowns. “I’m so sorry.”   
I stand up and smile. “Don’t be. It was kind of that he did fill in.” I tell her.   
“You didn’t kill him, did you?” She asks. “I mean; I won’t tell if you did.”   
I laugh and shake my head. “No, I didn’t kill him. We talked. Over the phone so I didn’t punch him, but it was good for me. I got what I needed and it has helped. I don’t think I’ll have to worry about Kevin for a while.”   
“Oh good. I kind of thought you were going to kill him.” She tells me.   
“Now tell me what happened.” I tell her.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Here is the updated version of Chapter 18! Tell me how it is. 
> 
> I don't own Criminal Minds, but I want to own some Criminal Minds Pins.

Almost two months had pasted and life was going good. We were on a mission dealing with a woman who was kind of crazy. We were telling Penny some things to search when Rossi said, “You’re kidding.”  
“What?” Hotch asks.   
I look over where Rossi was see a group of journalists. “What is it dad?” I ask him.  
“I'll be right back.” He tells us and walks away. I frown and watch him go.   
I just look where Rossi went and start walking towards there. I could hear Rossi calling security. I get to the opening and hear a woman say “I'm your daughter!”   
“Rossi?” I ask.   
He turns around and then back at the woman. Kate walks over. “We got to go guys.” She tells us.   
“Okay be right there.” Rossi tells her. He looks at the woman. “We will have a talk when I get back. Leave your information at the front desk.” He tells her and leads me away.   
“That woman is your daughter?” I ask, looking at him.   
“I don't know Gattina. We will talk about this after the case.” He says and we get in the car. He looked stressed the whole ride. Kate tried to get him to talk but he wasn't having it. I was getting worried. If Rossi had a real daughter, why would he want me. I look out the window and frown. I didn't want Rossi to not want me. I liked having a dad in my life. We were already one year into the adoption and I didn't want to just lose him.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR   
We solved the case and Rossi was on the phone. He starts going to the car and I follow him. “Where are you going?” I ask.   
“I'll be home soon Gwen. Just have Reid bring you home.” He tells me and drives off.   
I just stand there frowning. “Lyn?” I hear Spencer say to me.   
“He called me Gwen. He doesn't usually do that.” I say.   
“Who did? Rossi?” He asks me and I nod. “He was in a rush. Where did he go?”   
“To get his daughter.” I say and go to the cars.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR   
I was sitting in the living room, waiting for Rossi to get home. I was so scared that he was going to come home with his real daughter and tell me to get out. I kind of knew I knew I was being ridiculous but it didn't change how my mind was thinking. Rossi opens the door and walks in. “I didn't think you would still be up.” He tells me.   
“I wanted to see how things went? Where is she?” I ask.   
“She had to go back home.” He tells me and sits by me. “She has a son and husband back there.” He says and grins. “I have a grandson, Gattina.”   
“I'm happy for you Rossi. I should go get some sleep so I'll be up in time for work tomorrow.” I say and stand up.   
“Are you okay?” He asks me.   
I look at him and nod. “Yeah. Fine.” I say. “Night.” I say and go to my room.   
I call Spencer. “Hey Lyn. Did Rossi get home?” He asks.   
“Yeah…” I say softly.   
“What's wrong?” He asks.   
“Rossi has a daughter. A real daughter.” I tell him.   
“Is that who the girl was? The one who was stalking him?” He asks.  
“Yeah. She is his daughter and she has a son and husband.” I tell him.   
“That is great.” He says. “Right?”   
“I guess…” I say and lay on my bed.   
“Why isn't it?” He asks.   
“You will think I'm stupid. Well more stupid than you already think of me.” I say.   
“I don't think you are stupid Lyn.” Spencer says. “Nothing you say will make me think you are stupid.”   
“He is not going to adopt me.” I say softly and curl up.   
“What?!” He asks. I could hear the anger in his voice. “When did he tell you this?”   
“Well…” I start to say. “He hasn't told me yet. But I know it's coming. He has a real family. I mean he wanted to adopt me because he didn't have anyone but now he has her and her family. He doesn't need me.”   
“Gwendolyn…” Spencer says softly.   
“I should go. I'm tired. Night.” I say and hang up. I didn't want to hear Spencer tell me I was stupid to this what I was thinking. I didn't want to think of anything right now. I just didn’t know what to think right now. I try to get sleep but I keep waking up from a nightmare. Rossi was kicking me out and telling that he only pitted me and now that he had his new daughter and her perfect family, he didn’t need me. Then Spencer would pop up and tell me that he didn’t really love me and he was going to find someone who could actually love and not someone who was pathetic. Hotch would pop in, if I hadn’t already woken up, and tell me that I was the worst agent and that I was fired. I kept waking up at that point, if not earlier. I went out for breakfast the next morning trying not to yawn. I tried to cover up my bags, but I don’t think I did a great job. “Morning.” I say to Rossi as I sit down.   
“Bad night?” He asks and I just nod. “I’m sorry to hear that sweetie. Do you want me to just tell Hotch you will be coming in later? We are probably just doing paperwork.”   
“No. I’ll be fine Rossi.” I tell him and grab a banana.   
“Is that all you are eating?” He asks.   
“Not very hungry.” I tell him and eat.   
“Gwen… Is something wrong?” He asks, placing his hand on mine.   
“I’m fine.” I say and get up, taking my hand away. “I think I’m going to head in early. I’ll drive myself today.” I say and go out to my car. Once I’m out there I place my head on my steering wheel. “I’m so stupid.” I say softly. I sigh and get on the road.   
I make it to the office and head to my desk. “Hey beautiful.” Spencer says as I sit down. “You hung up on me last night. Are you okay?”   
“I’m fine.” I tell him and start my paperwork.   
“Did you get your coffee?” He asks, after I yawn for the second time. I shake my head. “Want me to grab you one?”   
“No thanks.” I tell him. I didn’t want to be a bother to him. I get up. “I’ll get it.” I say and smile softly at him. I head into the break room.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
-Spencer’s POV-   
Gwen goes to the break room and I just frown. Something was wrong with her and I was worried. She had bags under her eyes and she hung up on me last night. I see Rossi walk in and look around. I walk over to him. “Looking for Gwen?” I ask him.   
“Yeah. She didn’t really eat breakfast and left without really talking to me. I asked if she was okay and she said she was fine but I don’t have to be a profiler to know she isn’t.” He tells me. “Have you seen her?”   
“She went to get coffee. How much sleep did she get last night?” I ask.   
“Not a lot from the looks of it.” Rossi says. “Did she say anything to you?”   
“She called me last night telling that you had a daughter?” I tell him.   
He smiles. “Yeah. That girl who was here, the one I thought was stalking me, well she is my daughter. She told me I have a grandson and a husband. I’m going there this weekend to get to know them.” 

-Gwen’s POV-   
I walk into the office to see Rossi and Spencer talking. I hear Rossi telling Spencer about his new perfect family. “I’m going there this weekend to get to know them.” I hear Rossi say. I frown. He was so happy about meeting his real daughter. I just couldn’t compete with her. She had the perfect family and I was just some orphan. “Gattina.” I hear Rossi say as he notices me.   
I look up and smile softly. “Hey.” I say.   
“Are you sure you’re okay? You didn’t eat this morning.” He asks.   
“I’m fine. I’m just not hungry.” I say and start walking to my desk. “I should get some paperwork done.”   
Through the day, I kept to myself. I knew if I talked to anyone I would either blow up at them or start sobbing. I was just so afraid that now that Rossi has a real daughter he wouldn’t want me. I knew I needed to talking to him and get things figured out, but I didn’t want to talk to him and then my worst nightmares become true. Rossi comes over to me at the end of the day. “How about I take you out to dinner.” He tells me.   
I look at him and nod. “I’ll meet you at the house.” I tell him.   
“Sounds good, Gattina.” He says and kisses my head. “See you soon.”   
I watch him leave and I sigh. “That sounded promising.” Spencer says to me.   
“Or not.” I say. I get up. “I should just get this over with.”   
Spencer walks over to me and pulls me into his arms. “It’s going to be okay, Lyn. I promise you.” He tells me.   
I look at him and frown. “If he tells me to leave tonight, can I stay at your place?” I ask him.   
“Of course, but I don’t think that it will come to that. I want you to text me when you finish dinner.” He tells me.   
“Of course.” I tell him.   
I kiss him softly. “Have fun.” He tells me as I leave.   
I get home and see Rossi sitting on the couch. “Hey Gattina. Do you want to get ready and then head out?” He asks be.   
“Okay.” I saw and head to my room. I sit down on my bed and sigh. “I guess I should get this over with.” I stand up and get ready. I go out to the living room and look at Rossi. “I’m ready Rossi.”   
He gets up and comes over to me. “Are you sure you are alright?” He asks me, looking worried.   
“I’m fine. Why do you keep asking me?” I ask him.   
“You are just acting different.” He tells me. “I just worried that something happened. Does this have to something to do with Joy?”   
“Let’s just go.” I say to him softly. He leads me to the car and we start heading to the restaurant. “Where are we heading?”   
“A restaurant called The Knife. It’s in Woodbridge.” Rossi tells me.   
“That is twenty minutes away.” I say and frown.   
“More time for us to talk.” He tells me.   
“Oh great…” I say and look out the window.   
“Okay, tell me what’s wrong.” He tells me and sighs. “And don’t tell me that you are fine. I know something wrong and I want to help you, but I can’t do that unless you tell me what is wrong.”   
“I am fine.” I tell him.   
“Please Gwendolyn.” Rossi says softly. “I really need to understand what happened. I love you Gattina.”   
“I don’t want you to adopt me.” I tell him.   
He pulls the car over and looks at me. “Really? That’s what you really want?” He asks. I look over at him and he looks really sad.  
“Yes.” I tell him and look down. I didn’t want him to bring me to a restaurant just to tell me that he wanted me to move out. I would beat him to the punch. “I just want to save you some time.”   
“Save time?” He asks confused.   
“You were going to tell me at the restaurant that you want me to leave anyways so why would I let you do that when I can just end this now.” I tell him.   
“Gwen… look at me.” He says softly. I look at him. “Why would you ever think that I would want you to move out?” He asks.   
“You have your daughter now.” I say and tear up. “You don’t need to pity me. You can have your perfect family and forget me.” I look down and close my eyes.   
“Gwendolyn England. I need you to look at me right now.” He says.   
“What?” I look up and sigh.   
“I want you as my daughter. Having Joy in my life does not change that and will never change that. Why would you think this way?” He asks.   
“When I was fourteen, a family wanted to adopt me and we were in the process of it when they found out they were pregnant. They didn’t want to deal with me and have their baby, so they put me back in the foster care and that was when I ran away. No one wanted an older child and no one wanted me so why stay?” I tell him and feel some tears run down my face. “And now that you have Joy and her family, why would you want me?”   
“Oh Gattina…” He says and hugs me. “I will always want you. No matter what happens in my life.” He tells me. “I’m sorry that you were dealt a bad hand as a child but I am here for you. I want you in my life as my daughter. Nothing would make me happier.”   
I pull back. “They told me the same thing. Why should I believe you? You are leaving me for the weekend and didn’t even tell me.”   
“Gattina. I want you to go with me. I want you to meet your family.” He tells me.   
“Really?” I ask.   
“Really. You were part of my family first and you are staying in my family.” He tells me.   
I look down. “I feel foolish.” I tell him.   
“Don’t be. I understand where you are coming from.” He tells me. “Just come to me when you are feeling like you confused or hurt. I need you to trust me and know I won’t tell you that I will do something and not take my word back.”   
I nod and look at him. “I’ll try to learn that, dad.”   
“There we are. My Gattina is back.” He says. “You ready to have some good food?”   
“I am.” I tell him and smile softly.   
“Good. Let’s go.” He says and heads on the road.   
SRSRSRSRSRRSRSRSRSR  
That night, Rossi and I get back from a nice dinner. “We should do this again.” He tells me.   
“We should.” I say and smile. “I’m going to call Spencer and make amends with him.”   
“Gattina. Have Spencer come over tomorrow night. That way you can spend some time with him before we leave and he can have dinner here.” Rossi says to me.   
I look at him. “Should Spencer be worried?” I ask.   
“No. Just want to have a talk.” He says and smiles.   
“Okay…” I tell him and go to my room. I get in my pajamas and lay on my bed. I call Spencer with a smile.   
“So, do I have to make room for you?” He asks.   
“Nope. Everything is cleared up. I was being foolish.” I tell him.   
“Not foolish, just not thinking clearly.” He tells me. “Did you have fun today?”   
“I had a good time.” I tell him. “Um, do you want to come over tomorrow?”   
“Sure, what for?” He asks.   
“Just to hang out and have dinner.” I say softly.   
“Will Rossi be there?” He asks.   
“Maybe.” I say and close my eyes. “And he might have been the one to suggest you come over.”   
“Why?” He asks.   
“I think he wants to give you the dad talk.” I tell him.   
“The what?” He asks, sounding confused.   
“You know the dad talk.” I say. “’If you hurt my daughter, I’ll hurt you.’” I say in a deep voice. He just laughs. “What?”   
“That was adorable.” He says, laughing.   
“You suck.” I say and giggle.   
“You love it.” He says and I could hear the smile in his voice.   
“I do.” I say softly. “Can you come over for Rossi’s dad talk?”   
“Can you do the dad voice again?” He asks.   
“Spencer Reid, will you come to dinner?” I ask in a low voice.   
He starts laughing again. “Yes, I will come to dinner for the dad talk.”   
“Thank you nerd.” I tell him.   
“Anything for you.” He says.   
“I’m heading to bed.” I tell him.   
“I love you.” He tells me.   
“I love you too nerd.” I say. “Good night.” I hang up the phone and get under my covers and close my eyes. I sleep the night away with no nightmares.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Criminal Minds but I own the coffee I drink to write the chapters soo late at night

It was the next night and Rossi was teaching me how to make Zia Carolina's Pasta. We were almost done with dinner when the doorbell rings. “I’ll get it.” I tell Rossi and rush to the door and open it up and see Spencer standing there. He was dressed a little more nicely than usual. “Hey. You look nice.” I tell him. “Not that you don’t look nice other times…”   
“I understand Lyn.” He tells me. He brings flowers out from behind his back and smiles. “These are for you.”   
“Oh my gosh. Spence, you didn’t have to do that.” I tell him and smile. I take the flowers and smile. “Thank you.”   
“Anything for you darling.” He says and comes in. “You look very beautiful tonight.” He tells me.   
I was wearing a nice dark green dress and flats. “Oh thank you. I thought I would try and look nicer.” I tell him and close the door.   
“You always look nice.” He says and I kiss his cheek.   
“Gattina. Bring the boy in here.” I hear Rossi say.   
I look at Spencer and smiles. “You ready?” He just nods and I lead him into the kitchen. “Look what Spence brought me, dad.” I tell Rossi and show him the flowers.   
“Very nice. There is vase in the cabinet by the fridge.” Rossi tells me. I go over and get the vase, fill it with water and the food, and put the flowers in the vase. “So Reid. How are tonight?”   
“I’m good, sir.” Spencer says and stands there awkwardly. “How about you?”   
“I’m good.” Rossi says. “So let’s get to eating.” He brings the dishes to the kitchen table and Spencer and I sit on one side and Rossi sits on the other side. We start eating and no one talks. It was getting very awkward, very fast.   
“This is very good, sir.” Spencer tells Rossi.   
“Gwen helped make it. I’m teaching her how to cook like a real Italian.” Rossi says.   
“It is good Lyn.” Spencer tells me.   
We all finish eating. “I’ll go start the dishes.” I tell them and get the dishes. “Have fun boys.” I say and walk into the kitchen.   
-Spencer’s POV-   
I watch Gwen go into the kitchen and then look at Rossi. “So I wanted to talk to you.” Rossi says to me. “Now I know you well and I know you will do anything to protect Gwendolyn, but I have always wanted to do this speech and I am going to give it to you.” He tells me and I just nod. “Okay. I want to tell you that if you hurt her, I will hurt you.”   
“Why didn’t you hurt Kevin?” I ask.   
“Gwendolyn told me not to. It would have hurt her and I didn’t want to make her in more pain.” He tells me and then smiles. “Doesn’t mean I didn’t have Morgan go ruff him up.”   
I smile and nod. “I won’t hurt her. I love your daughter and I want will always treat her like a queen.” I tell him.   
“And I believe that you will, but how do I know that your relationship with her is not just a rebound from Maeve?” Rossi asks.   
“I wasn’t sure either, to tell you the truth.” I tell him and sigh. “I mean I know I still love Maeve, but I love Gwen. I have moved on and this is no rebound. I would never hurt your daughter in that way.”   
“How can I believe that? You just said you love a different girl.” Rossi says.   
“I know it sounds like I’m just pushing my feelings for Gwen from my feelings for Maeve, but they aren’t.” I try to convince him.   
“Do you still carry around Maeve’s book?” Rossi asks.   
“Yes.” I say softly.   
“Then how do I know that you aren’t just shifting your feelings?” Rossi asks.   
“I don’t know what to tell you but I know my feelings are true. I know I want Gwen as my girlfriend and I want her to stay that way. I don’t know how to convince you, other than to tell you to give me time.” I say.   
He nods and sighs. “I like you Reid. I love having you as my team member, but I will ruin your life if you hurt my daughter.” He tells me.   
“I won’t do that. I promise.” I tell him.   
“You guys done with your talk?” I hear Gwen ask.   
I turn around and nod. “Yes, Gattina. We are done.” Rossi tells me.   
“Okay, well since you two are done, I’m going to steal my boyfriend away.” Gwen says and walks to me. “We will be in my room.” She tells Rossi and leads me to her room.   
-Gwen’s POV-   
I lead Spencer into my room and I sit on my bed and smile at Spencer. “Want to watch Doctor Who?” I ask.   
“Of course.” Spencer says.   
I move across my bed and grab the remotes. I look at Spencer standing there awkwardly. “Get in bed, silly.”   
“What?” He asks me.   
I pat the bed. “Get in my bed. You don’t have to stand there.” I tell him and smile. “My dad won’t come in and yell at you for being in my bed.”   
“Are you sure?” He asks, nervous.   
“Of course.” I say and pat the bed again. He slowly gets on and sits at the edge of my bed. I pull him onto the bed and giggle. “Just lay on my bed like it is yours.” I tell him.   
“Okay.” He says and lays on my bed. “I need to take my shoes off.” He says and sits up. He slowly takes his shoes off as I set up Doctor Who.   
I look at him as he lays on my bed. I start an episode and lay down. I slowly move to lay on my side and lay my head on his chest. “Is this okay?” I ask softly.   
“Of course.” He says and wraps his arm around my waist. “Is this okay?” I nod and he moves me closer. We watch the episode and I start looking at him half way through the episode. He finally notices me looking at me. “Hey. Do you not like this episode?” He asks me.   
“No I do.” I tell him. “Can I try something?”   
“Of course.” He says and looks at me. I move onto my elbow and kiss Spencer softly. He kisses back and pulls me close. I close my eyes and move my hands into his hair and he moans. I pull back, blushing. “Sorry.” Spencer says that softly.   
I shake my head. “No. I just… this is new to me.” I tell him.   
“I know. I haven’t done this a lot. Really just once. In a pool.” He tells me.   
“I will want to know that story one day.” I tell him.   
“You will, but I want to continue what we were doing.” He says and pulls me down and kisses me. I kiss back and close my eyes. Spencer moves one of his hands down to my butt and I jump. “Sorry.” He says quickly.   
“No. It just scared me. I wasn’t expecting that.” I tell him.   
“Do you want me to move it?” He asks, blushing. I shake my head. “Good.” He says and kisses me again. I slowly move on top of him and straddle him. He pulls back and smiles at me. “Bold move.” He says.   
“I learn from the best.” I tell him softly.   
“Not complaining.” He tells me and kisses me again. I kiss him back and move my hands back into his hair. He slowly starts kissing down to my neck and I shiver. “You like that?” He asks softly, between kisses. I nod and lean my head back. He flips us over so he was on top. “Are you okay?” He asks.   
“Y-Yeah.” I say softly. I was enjoying this but was unsure how far Spencer wanted to take it. Rossi was in the house and I knew I didn’t want my first time with my dad in the house.   
“Gwendolyn.” Spencer says. “We can stop.”   
“I don’t want to stop doing this, but I don’t want to go any further.” I tell him softly, looking away. I was afraid that he was going to be mad or upset with me.   
Spencer cups my chin and makes me look at him. “I’m fine with that. I didn’t want this to go further. I want your first time to be special and if you allow me to be your first, then I will make sure it is special.” He tells me.   
“Thank you.” I say softly.   
“Don’t say thank you. I want to treat you like a queen.” He tells me. “Want to continue?”   
“Yes please.” I say and grin. He starts kissing my collar bone and starts kissing up. I close my eyes and moan softly.   
“Someone is enjoying themselves.” Spencer says softly. I giggle and pull him closer. He continues to kiss up my neck and stops in a place and sucks on that spot. I moan and giggle.   
The door opens suddenly and I push Spencer off of me. “Dad!” I yell at Rossi, blushing.   
“I heard strange sounds. I got worried.” Rossi says, glaring at Spencer.   
“I am your daughter and I understand you want to protect me, but I need privacy and I need you to treat me like an adult.” I tell him.   
“Maybe Spencer should go home.” Rossi says.   
“Rossi. I can make that decide myself. Please treat me like the adult I am.” I tell him. “Please get out.”   
He sighs and nods. “Fine. I’m sorry.” Rossi tells us and leaves, shutting the door as he goes.   
“Oh god.” I say softly and put my head in my hands. “That was so embarrassing.” I say.   
“That was even more embarrassing then the talk.” Spencer says. “I don’t think I continue if I wanted to.”   
“Me either.” I say and look at him. He was sitting up and looking at me. “I kind of can’t wait till this two year waiting ends so I can live alone again. I love living with Rossi, but it is weird.” I say.   
“I understand.” He says. “I should get home.”   
“Yeah. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.” I say and stand up.   
He stands up and nods. “Yeah. Walk me to the door?”   
“Of course.” I say and take his hand. “Let’s go.” I start leading him out the door, but he stops me.   
“My shoes sweetie.” He reminds me.   
“Oh yeah.” I giggle and let him get his shoes on. I lead him to the door and smile. “This was fun.”   
“It was. We’ll have to do this again.” He says to me.   
“Yes we will.” I tell him.   
“Gwendolyn England, will you accompany on a date this Friday?” He asks.   
I grin. “I would love to but I’m flying out with Rossi to see Joy.” I tell him.   
“Okay. Then tomorrow?” He asks.   
“Don’t want to wait?” I ask.   
“Nope. I want you to have the full first date experience and I want it to be soon.” Spencer says and grins.   
“Sounds good.” I say and give him a small kiss.   
“Good night Gwen.” He says.   
“Night.” I say as he leaves the place.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRRSR  
I get into work the next day, wearing a scarf. It was super warm in the offices but I didn’t want the team to see the hickey that Spencer left on me. I sit at my desk and take off my coat. I look at Spencer and frown. “What’s wrong?” He asks.   
“I have a hickey.” I whisper to him. “I have to wear this hot scarf and I can’t take it off.”   
“I’m sorry.” He says softly, frowning.   
“I know but they are going to have me take the scarf off and I am going to get teased. You too.” I tell him.   
“Hey love birds.” Morgan says and smiles at us. Kate, JJ, and Morgan walk over.   
“Hey guys.” I say to them.   
“You look hot. Why don’t you take that scarf off?” JJ asks me.   
“Oh no. I’m cold.” I say and smile.   
“You are sweating.” Kate says and laughs. “Just take it off.”   
“Unless you are hiding something that you don’t want us to see.” Morgan says and smirks. “Did you and pretty boy have some fun last night.”   
I sigh and take the scarf off. “I hate working with profilers.” I grumble.   
“Oh Pretty boy did a number on your neck.” Morgan says and laughs. “Did Rossi see this?”   
“No. I don’t want him to. I try to cover it, but it didn’t work.” I tell him. I look at Spencer and frown. “I would run.”  
“Why should he run?” I hear Rossi ask.   
“No reason.” I say and try to grab my scarf.   
“What is that on your neck?” Rossi asks. I close my eyes and groan. Morgan just laughs.   
“Winnie!!!” Penny yells as she runs into the offices. I turn and look at her. “I found your parents!” She says as she gets closer.   
I stand up and meet her half way. “What? You did?” I ask.   
She grins and nods. “Yes. I have the file. Do you want to see it?” She asks.   
I take the file and look at it. “Dad, can I use your office?” I ask Rossi, not looking away from the file.   
“Of course sweetie. Do you want me to come with?” He asks.   
“No. I want to be alone.” I say and go to his office. I sit down at his desk and set the file on the desk. I sit back and sigh. All my questions can be answered with this file. I can find out who they are and then I can find out why they didn’t want me. I sigh and get up. I walk around the office and look everywhere but the file. “Gah!” I sit on the couch. “Why is this so hard!?” I yell and close my eyes. I get up and go back to the desk. I sit down and open the file. I see a birth certificate and see my full name: Gwendolyn Sue England. I look down the certificate and see mother’s name and father’s name. Next to the mother’s name is Lisa Hartzell and next to the father’s name is Michael England. I had names. I knew Penny had already looked them up and that was the rest of the file. I turn the page and see sheet on Lisa England. I read the page and found out that Lisa was a prostitution, who was on drugs all through her life. She had passed away from an OD three years ago. I turn the page and see a bunch of pages stapled together. It was the file on Michael. I’m guessing that my mother and father weren’t married because her last name is different from my father’s. Why she had my last name be his, I’m not sure. I start looking into Michael’s life. He was a lawyer in town. I see his address there and sigh. I could visit him. I look more into his file. He had a family. He was married to Tina England, and they had a son, Josh England, and a daughter, Jessica England. They lived thirteen miles away from the BAU. I hear a knock on the door. “Come in.” I say.   
Rossi opens the door and peeks in. “You okay in here?” He asks.   
“Yeah, come in.” I tell him. “My mom was a drug addict and died three years ago. She ODed.”   
“I’m sorry Gattina.” He says as he sits down by me.   
“I’m okay with it. I know why she didn’t want me. She couldn’t take care of me. She wanted the best chance for me.” I say and smile softly.   
“And your dad?” He asks.   
“He lives in town. My guess is that he didn’t know about me. My mother had a different last name.” I tell him. “He has a family.”   
“Do you want to get to know him?” Rossi asks.   
“Maybe.” I say and look at him. “Would that be bad?”   
“Of course not sweetie. I just want you to be happy.” He says and smiles softly.   
“Maybe I’ll call when we get back from Joy’s.” I say and close the file. “I want to focus on my sister.”   
“And your date tonight?” Rossi says and smiles.   
“You heard?” I ask.   
“Not last night, but Reid was telling Morgan and JJ about it.” Rossi says. “I’m happy that you are happy.”   
“Thanks dad.” I say and I hug him. “You will always be my dad, no matter what comes from this.”   
“I know Gattina.” He says and kisses my head as he pulls back. “Now this hickey…”   
“Dad!” I say and roll my eyes.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
JJ, Kate, and Penny asked if I wanted help getting ready for the date and I said of course, so it was an hour till my date and the girls were helping me get ready. I had Kate do my make-up, JJ do my hair, and Penny picked out my outfit. Once they were done, I look in the mirror and smile. “I need you girls to come over every morning and help me get ready. I don’t know what magic you guys have, but I need to learn it.” I say and look at them.   
“Like I told you last time. We didn’t do much. You a beautiful woman and we just accented that.” JJ tells me.   
“Well thank you so much. I know I would look like a mess if left alone before this date. I’m so nervous.” I say and smile.   
“Even more than with Kevin?” JJ asks.   
“Even more than with Kevin. That was first date nerves. This is something more. I could really see this go somewhere.” I say and giggle.   
“Aww I’m so happy for you two.” Penny says.   
“You two are super cute.” Kate says.   
“We need to have a girl’s night one night.” I say. “We can have it in the theatre room and stay up and watch movies on a huge screen.”   
“That sounds like a great idea.” Penny says.   
“It must be nice to have someone to just have money that you can use.” Kate says.   
I look at her and frown. “I don’t use Rossi’s money.” I say.   
“I bet you don’t pay rent, or pay for bills or food. He is taking care of you.” Kate explains.   
“Well, Rossi is adopting her.” JJ says softly.   
“Who adopts a twenty-five-year-old?” Kate asks.   
“He wants me to be his daughter.” I say softly.   
“I get that but does it have to be a legal adoption?” Kate asks.   
“Yes. He knows that not ever being adopted have hurt me and he wants to prove to me that he will always want me.” I say.   
“It’s just a little strange, but who am I to say anything?” Kate asks.   
“We should get out of here before Reid comes.” Penny says and smiles at me.   
I nod and lead them to the door. “We will plan that girl’s night sometime soon.” I tell them.   
“Sounds good. Night.” JJ says and they all leave.   
I close the door and find Rossi in his office. “Hey dad.” I say softly.   
He looks up and grins. “Oh Gattina. You look so beautiful.” He says and stands up. He walks to me. “He is going to be eating out of your hand.”   
I laugh and nod. “Thanks dad.” I say.   
“Are you coming home tonight?” He asks.   
“I think so, but I won’t say yes.” I say.   
“Okay, just make sure to be safe.” He says.   
I blush and look down. “Hey, I have a question.” I say and look up.   
“What is it?” He asks.   
“Do you want me to help with bills or food or rent?” I ask.   
“Of course not. You are my daughter. Why would I make you pay anything?” He asks.   
“I’m just living here for free then.” I say, frowning.   
“Is that a problem?” He asks, frowning.   
“I just think people are thinking that this is all very weird.” I say and look away.   
“I don’t have a problem sharing my wealth with you. I don’t use it for anything so why not use it for the special girl in my life. I want to make sure that you are happy and don’t have to worry about anything. I’m fine with you staying here for free. If people think that this is weird, then let them.” Rossi says.   
I nod and smile. “Okay. I just don’t want people to question why we are doing this.” I say.   
The doorbell rings and I look at Rossi. “Go on your date. Have a good time. If you want to resume this talk, we can do it on the plane tomorrow.”   
“Thanks dad.” I say and hug him. I pull back. “I’ll see you later.” I say and rush to the door. I open it to see Spencer standing there with flowers. “More flowers?” I ask and giggle.   
“More flowers.” He says and hand them to me.   
“They are beautiful. Let me put them with the others and I’ll be ready.” I tell him and move to the kitchen.   
I hear him shut the door and follow me. “You look beautiful Lyn.” I hear him say.   
“Thanks.” I say as I put the flowers with the others. “There, perfect.” I say and look at Spencer. “Hey.”   
“Hey back.” He says and walks to me. “You look so beautiful.” He says and kisses me softly.   
“JJ, Kate, and Penny helped me.” I tell him.   
“Ready to head out?” He asks and holds out his hand.   
I grab my purse and phone. “Ready.” I say and place my hand in his. He leads me to his car and opens the door for me. “Oh thank you.” We get in the car and head to the restaurant.   
We have dinner at a nice restaurant. We get back into the car and he looks at me. “So I was wondering if you wanted to stay the night?” He asks.   
I nod and smile. “Sure.” I say.   
He grins and drives back to his house. We get into his apartment and I look at the shelfs. “I love your apartment.” I say to him.   
“I’m glad.” He tells me. “I pay more for it because of this room, but I love it so it’s worth it.”   
“I would pay more too.” I say, walking up to the book cases.   
Spencer wraps his arms around my waist and moves my hair to the side. He kisses the area on my back that was bare. I giggle and turn around. He smiles and kisses me. I close my eyes and kiss him back. He deepens the kiss and moves one of his hands into my hair, holding me close. I move one of my hands onto his chest and the other into his hair. He pulls back and kisses my neck. I moan softly and lean my head back. “Y-You are s-so good at that.” I say softly. I could feel him smile as he kisses down my neck. He gets to my collar bone and bites my skin softly. I pull him close and moan. “More.” I say softly.   
He pulls back. “Bedroom?” He asks softly. His hair was even more messed up than it usually was. I nod and grin. He picks me up bridal style and I wrap my arms around his neck. “Told you I could carry you.” He tells me.   
“Shut up and get me to your bedroom.” I say and kiss his neck as he walks up to the bedroom.   
“If you keep doing that Gwendolyn, I will drop you.” He warns me. I giggle and keep it up. We get to the bedroom and he drops me onto the bed. I giggle and look up at him. “Told you.”   
“Get down here genius.” I tell him, pulling him down by his tie.   
He lays over me and we resume kissing. He places a hand on my thigh and I jump. He pulls back. “We can stop.” He tells me, panting.   
I shake my head. “No. I want to go all the way.” I tell him.   
“Are you sure? I want to make sure you are really ready.” He tells me.   
I grab his tie and pull him down. “I’m ready. I want it to be you.” I tell him and kiss him. He grins into the kiss and moves his hand up.   
The next two hours were the most magical time of my life. Spencer was gentle and so kind to me. After, I was laying my head on his chest and we were just lying in his bed, naked. “Wow.” I say and giggle.   
“Glad you liked it.” He says and kisses my head.   
“That was amazing Spence.” I say and look at him. “Thank you.”   
“No need to thank me.” He tells me and kisses me softly. “I wish you could just stay here this weekend.”   
“I need to go visit my sister and her family. I want to get to know her.” I tell him, tracing shapes on his chest.   
“No I know and I want you to do that.” He says and plays with my hair. “I’m going to miss you.”   
“I’ll miss you too but it will only be a couple days. Not like I’m going back to training.” I say.   
“That was awful and I wasn’t even dating you. I hated not seeing your face for five months. I was worried that the Silencer was going to come and steal you.” He tells me.   
“I hate that I missed Strauss’ funeral. I hate that I wasn’t here for my dad.” I say and frown.   
“I know but he got that letter and I know it was the one thing that made him smile for the first time after her death and he got to see you the next week.” He says.   
“Yeah, but I might have been there to help him as he was dealing with that when it was happening.” I say and sigh.   
“You were training sweetie. I know he understood.” He says. “So we haven’t talked about your parent yet. Well your biological ones.”   
“My mother isn’t alive. She was a drug addict.” I say. “I don’t think she told my father about me. She was a prostitute and I think it just happened. She knew she couldn’t raise me so she just left me.”   
“I’m sorry Lyn.” He says and kisses my forehead.   
“I’m actually okay with it. I never knew her and she did try to give me a better life. It just never worked that way but she tried.” I say and sigh.   
“What about your father?” He asks, moving his hand down my back and resting it on my lower back.   
“He lives in town. He is a lawyer. He has a family. The whole picture, wife, son, and daughter.” I tell him. “I’m thinking of calling him.”   
“I think you should. Don’t let yourself wonder what if all your life.” He tells me.   
“I might after Rossi and I get back.” I say.   
“How is Rossi taking this?” He asks.   
“Like a champ. He is so supportive. He told me that he would support anything I want to do.” I tell him as I yawn.   
“Let’s get to bed.” He says.   
“I don’t have pajamas.” I say and blush.   
“Do want to wear one of my shirts?” He asks. I nod and he sits up, sitting me up at the same time. “They are in the closet. I’m going to get my pajamas on.” He says, standing up and grabbing some clothes and heading into the bathroom. I stand up and go to his closet, after putting on my underwear. I find a nice purple button up that seemed like it would fit me and be long enough. I finish buttoning it up when Spencer gets back out and I look at him. He looks up and his mouth drops open. “You look so hot in that.” He says and walks over to me. “If we weren’t so tired, I would take you again.”   
I giggle and blush. “Next time.” I say and go to his bed. “Do you have a certain side you like?”   
I feel arms wrap around me. “Nope. I just want to be in this bed with you.” He says and kisses the side of my neck.   
“Spence. I’m tired.” I say and giggle.   
He kisses my neck one more time and lets me go. I get into bed and he crawls in after me. I move so I am laying my head on his chest. He wraps his arms around me. “Good night Gwendolyn.” He says softly and kisses my cheek.   
“Good night Spencer.” I say and close my eyes.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, Sorry I didn't post a chapter last night. I had a minor break down but I'm better now. 
> 
> I don't own Criminal Minds

I wake up the next morning, feeling an arm around me. I slowly open my eyes and see Spencer still sleeping. I smile and try to move out of his arm, but it just tightens. “Don’t leave.” I hear Spencer say softly.   
“Not leaving. Just need to use the restroom.” I tell him. He lets me go and I get up and go to the restroom. I get back and look at my phone. “It’s seven o’clock.” I tell him. “I need to go home before work.”   
He slowly sits up. “Okay. Let me get ready and I’ll take you.” He says softly, rubbing his eyes.   
I look at him and smile. “You are cute in the morning.” I say, going to get my clothes. His hair was sticking up all over and he was trying to focus on me. I smile and get my clothes on.   
He gets up and kisses me softly. “Morning.” He says.   
“Morning love.” I say. “We should hurry.”   
“Yeah. Let me get dressed and then we can go.” He tells me. He gets dressed and then go into the bathroom to finish getting ready. I sit on his bed and wait for him. He comes out and grabs his stuff. He looks at me and smiles. “I think you should go to work like that.” He says.  
I shake my head and laugh. “No way Spence. I will not have more people talking about me.” I tell him.   
He laughs and we go out to his car. He drives me home and we get there as soon as Rossi comes out. “Hey Gattina. Do you want a ride?” Rossi asks.   
“No. Both of you get to work. I’ll be there soon. Can you tell Hotch that I’ll be a little late?” I ask Rossi.   
“Sure sweetie.” Rossi says.   
“See you at work Lyn.” Spencer says and leaves.   
“Did you have fun?” Rossi asks.   
I smile and nod. “I did. You should go though so you aren’t also late. We can talk on the plane.” I tell him.   
“Sounds good sweetie. See you soon.” Rossi says and leaves.   
I go in and get ready. The day passes pretty fast, the team was just doing paperwork. The girls came over to see how the date went and I told them out the date, leaving out the end part. They didn’t need to know. We planned to have our girl’s weekend the following weekend. Rossi and I hurry up and go home. We pack up and get to the plane. It took us two hours to get to San Francisco. We get off the plane and see Joy standing there with a man and little boy. Joy grins at us and we walk over.   
“Dad.” Joy says and hugs Rossi.   
He hugs back and smiles. “Hey Joy.” They pull apart and he looks at me. “Joy, this is your sister, Gwendolyn.” He says as I walk over.   
“Hello Joy.” I say to the woman. “I’m happy that I finally get to meet you.”   
“I am too. Dad has told me so much about you.” Joy says and hugs me. I hug back and smile. We pull back. “Come meet the rest of the family.”   
“Sounds good.” Rossi says and Joy leads us to her family.   
“Dad and Gwendolyn, this is Shawn, my husband, and this is my son, Kai.” Joy tells us. “Kai, this is your grandpa and your aunt Gwendolyn.”   
“You guys can all call me Gwen. It’s easier to say.” I tell them. I kneel down and smile at Kai. “Hello Kai. I’m so happy to finally meet you.”   
“Hi.” Kai says softly, hiding behind Shawn’s leg.   
I stand up and smile. “We should get to my house. We have dinner ready.”   
We spend the weekend at Joy’s getting to know her. It was Sunday and Rossi and I were getting ready to leave. “Hey Gwen. Can we talk before you leave?” Joy comes up to me.   
“Of course.” I tell her and we go out to out to the patio and sit down. “What did you want to talk about?”   
“So you are getting adopted by dad soon right?” Joy asks.   
“Yeah. We will be able to finish it in around six months.” I say and smile.   
“That’s great. I just want to know why you are doing it?” She asks.   
“What do you mean?” I ask.   
“I just want to make sure that you are doing this for the right reason. Dad is a rich guy. It was probably easy to say yes to him.” Joy says.   
“I’m not looking for money. I care about Rossi and he cares about me.” I say.   
“I just want to make sure. I don’t want to told that he was hurt by you.” Joy says.   
“I won’t hurt him. I care about him. All that matters to me is that he cares about me. I don’t want his money; I want his love.” I tell her.   
She looks at me and nods. “Okay. I believe you.” She tells me and smiles. “It really has been nice meeting you and getting to know you guys.”   
“Yeah I feel the same way. I was worried at first, but you are an amazing person and I am proud to call you my sister.” I say.   
Rossi comes out and smiles at us. “How are my girls?”   
“We are good, just talking.” Joy tells him. She smiles at me. “Getting some girl time before you guys leave.”   
“We should get out of here though. Our plane leaves in two hours.” Rossi says.   
Joy and I get up and we hug each other. “You have to visit us soon. We can have a girl’s night with the others girls on the team.” I tell her as we pull back.   
“That sounds like a great idea.” She says and looks at Rossi. “I’m so glad you came this weekend. I’m glad I got to meet you two.”   
“I’m glad we came too. I love getting to know your family.” Rossi says.   
“Are you sure you don’t want us to take you to the airport. I’m sure we will have time before Kai’s soccer game.” Joy says.   
“No, don’t worry about it. We can take a taxi.” Rossi says.   
“The taxi is out front.” Shawn says, sticking his head out.   
“Thanks. This is our goodbye. I’ll call you soon.” Rossi tells Joy.   
“Bye dad.” Joy says and hugs Rossi. She looks at me after she pulls away. “Bye sis.”   
I grin and nod. “Bye sis.” I say. Rossi and I get in the taxi and head back to Virginia.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
We get home and I sit in the living room. I pull out my phone and look at my father’s number. “Have you called him yet?” Rossi asks as he sits down beside me.   
I look at him. “No. I don’t know if I want to.” I tell him.   
“He is your father. He should get the chance to know about him.” He says and puts an arm around me. “He might want to get to know you.”   
“What if he just ignores me. I don’t know if I can handle that.” I say.   
“You have to put yourself out there just to get the chance to make a connection.” Rossi says and kisses my head. “I can sit right here if you want.”   
“Yes please.” I tell him.   
“I’ll be right here.” He says and takes my hand.   
I sigh and call the number. I close my eyes and wait as the phone rings. After three rings, a man’s voice comes on the line. “Hello?” He says.   
“Hello, is this Michael England?” I ask, trying to keep my voice steady.  
“Yes, who is this?” He asks.   
“I’m Gwendolyn. You knew my mother, Lisa Hartzell?” I ask.   
“I met her one night. I didn’t really know her.” Michael says. “What is this about?”   
“Well you slept with her that night and she got pregnant. I am that child. I’m your daughter.” I tell him, shaking. Rossi rubs my back and I look at him.   
“Is this a cruel joke?” Michael asks.   
I frown. “No. She gave me up for adoption and I wanted to know who my real parents are and you are my father.” I tell him.   
“What do you want? Money? Power? Legal support?” He asks me. “Your mother wanted those things too.”   
“N-No. I just wanted to tell you about me.” I say softly.   
“Well you did. Have a good life.” He says and hangs up.   
I lower my phone and frown. “He doesn’t want to know me.” I say softly and look at Rossi.   
“Are you okay Gattina?” He asks, looking worried.   
I sigh and nod. “I have you. I wasn’t looking for a father figure. I don’t need one.” I say and look at my hands. “I just wanted to tell him and like he said, I did that.”   
“I’m sorry sweetie. It’s his loss.” He tells me.   
I nod. “I’m going to my room to unpack.” I tell him and stand up.   
“You sure you will be okay?” He asks.   
“Yeah. I don’t need him. I just want a little alone time.” I say and hug Rossi. “I had a great time this weekend. Thank you for letting me go.” I say and stand up.   
“Any time Gattina.” He says as I walk to my room.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
It was the weekend after Rossi and I got back. I getting the theatre room ready for the girl’s night. I ordered pizzas, got ice cream and snacks, and set up movies. I didn’t know how to do a girl’s night. I was getting all my ideas from chick flicks. I was hoping I was doing things right. The doorbell rang and I rushed to the door. When I opened it, all the girls were there. “Hey!” I say and let them in.   
“Hey Gwen. I’m so happy we get to do this.” JJ says and hugs me. I hug and then pull back.   
“Winnie. This is going to be so much fun!” Penny tells me and hugs me. I hug and then pull back.   
“This is going to be a great break that I need.” Kate says and smiles at me.   
I smile and lead the girls to the theatre room. I had set up some air mattresses on the floor and got a bunch of blankets and pillows. “So I hope I did this right.” I say. “I got pizza coming and I got snacks. Um I set up some movies. I don’t know what you guys like so I just got a bunch of types.” I tell them.   
“Anything you have is good.” JJ says and looks around. “This looks fun.”   
“This is so cute!” Penny says. “What movies do you have?”   
“Um, Mean Girls, Pride and Prejudice, um, Clueless, and other things.” I say.   
“Clueless is my favorite movie ever!” Kate says and grins.   
“Let’s watch that one!” JJ says. We all sit on an air mattress and I start the movie. “So Gwen, how are things with Spence?”   
“Things are great. We are doing very well.” I tell her and the others since they were listening in. “He treats me like a queen and I love it.”   
“I’m so happy for you guys. You both deserve it.” Penny says to me.   
“I can see that you guys make each other really happy.” Kate says.   
“I’m really happy.” I say and look down, blushing.   
“So who was that Kevin guy and why did the group have a problem with him?” Kate asks.   
“He was my ex. He cheated on me and kind of messed me up.” I tell her.   
“Ouch. I see why you and Spencer had a problem with him.” Kate says.   
“It was a bad breakup. He came into the offices and was so rude. Gwen punched him in the nose.” JJ tells Kate.   
“You go girl!” Kate says and we all laugh. “I feel for you. I’m so happy that I’m done with all the dating drama.”   
“I feel you.” JJ says and they high five.   
“Dating is fun. You get to learn new things about people.” Penny says and smiles.   
“How is Sam?” I ask her.   
“He is doing great. He is a rock star.” Penny says and grins. “Inside and outside the bedroom.”   
“Penny!” I say and giggle. I blush and look down.   
“Oh come on. You and boy wonder haven’t gotten that far?” Penny asks.   
“I don’t kiss and tell.” I say softly.   
“Oh my gosh. Gwen and Spence are having sex!” JJ says, laughing.   
“This is fantastic. I wonder if Morgan know yet.” Penny says.   
“Can we move onto a different topic?” I ask softly.   
“Was it your first time?” Kate asks. I nod slowly, getting embarrassed. “Oh that is so cute. She is adorable.”   
“So the weather is super nice out.” I say, getting even more embarrassed. “This movie is a great movie.”   
“Oh we’re sorry Winnie but we are happy for you guys. I’m glad you can trust him after everything that has happened.” Penny says and smiles.   
“Okay, enough of my love life. Let’s talk about something else.” I say and look away.   
“Okay, we will stop.” JJ says. “I’m happy that you are with him though. You guys are a perfect couple.”   
The rest of the night, we watched movies, ate horrible food, and talked about anything and everything.  
SRSRSRSRSRRSRSRSRSRRSRSRSR  
I was with Spencer when he gets a call. “Dr. Reid.” He answers it and I move on top of him. He grins at me and kisses my head. He pulls back and frowns. “Wait, what?” He asks, sitting up. I have to sit up and I look at him. “We will be there soon.” He says and stands up. He hangs the phone up and grabs his bag. “Let’s go.” He says as he walks out of the room.   
“Spence, wait!” I say and stand, trying to catch up with him. I get my purse and slip on my shoes. I get to the living room and see Spencer waiting. “Do we have a case?” I ask him as we leave his apartment.   
“Just hurry.” He says softly and rushes to his car. I have to run to keep up with him.   
“Spence, tell me what is going on? Is it someone from the team? Are they hurt?” I ask and turn him around. “I need to know what is going on.”   
“We don’t have time for your foolish stuff right now Gwen. I need to go and if you want a ride, you need to hurry up.” He says and keeps walking. His words hurt me, but I was more worried about what I would go into at this point. Was one of the team member’s dead? Was it Rossi? We get to the car and Spencer speeds out of his parking spot. It took us two hours to get to a cabin where other cars were. I could recognize many of the team member’s cars. Spencer gets out of the car and rushes into the cabin. I hurry up and follow him.   
Once we get into the cabin, I see most of the team standing over a covered body. I look at Spencer and see that he is almost crying. I look at Rossi and he that is really sad. I wasn’t sure what was going on. Morgan and Penny come in after us and Penny looks at the body and then Hotch. “Is it him?” She asks him.   
“Gideon is dead.” Hotch says, and everything makes a lot more since. After Hotch tells us the news, Spencer rushes out of the cabin. I look at Rossi and he shakes his head. I nod and I run after Spencer.   
“Spence.” I call after him. I see him by his car, staring at the ground. I walk over and stand by him. I don’t say anything, but I grab his hand to let him know I was here for him. After a while, Spencer leans his head on mine and sighs. I move my hand to his back and rub it. “I’m here for you Spence. Whenever you want to talk.” I tell him and feel his head move, nodding.   
After an hour, the paramedics come and take the body away. Spencer and I move closer, watching them load the body into the cornier van. “Come on pretty boy. We will follow.” Morgan comes up to us. Spencer nods and looks at me.   
“I’ll be right there. I just want to tell my dad where I am.” I tell them.   
“We’ll be in the car.” Morgan tells me and leads Spencer into a car.   
I sigh and go to Hotch and Rossi. Rossi looks at me and smiles softly. “Hey Gattina.” He says.   
“Hey dad. I hate to do this, but Spencer…” I say.   
“I understand. Go be there for him. I can handle this better than he can.” Rossi says. “I’ll be here when you get back.”   
“Thanks dad.” I say and hug him. “I’m sorry for your loss.”   
“Thank you sweetie. Go to your boy.” He tells me as he pulls away.   
I rush to the car and get in the back. I see Spencer in the back with me. I shut the door and scoot over to him. I have him lay his head on my chest and play with his hair. “We’re ready Morgan.” I say softly. The whole way to the ME, Spencer is just laying his head on me, crying softly. I could tell that this wasn’t just a co-worker to him. I would have to talk to Morgan later.   
We get to the ME and we all get out. I take Spencer’s hand and we head in. “I kept him covered up out of respect.” The examiner tells us. She starts telling how he died and I look at Spencer. He was looking at the body and I didn’t know how to make him better. I just squeeze his hand to let him know I was there. He squeezes back and smile softly. At least he was responding. “After the final shot, he was gone within a fraction of a second.” The examiner told us.   
“Would you excuse us, please?” Morgan asks her.   
“Of course.” She says and leaves.   
I look at Morgan and frown. “Spence…” I say softly.   
“Did you hear any of that?” Morgan asks.   
Spencer cries softly and I frown. “Spencer…”   
“Gwen, can you give us a little time?” Morgan asks me.   
I nod and look at Spencer. “I’ll be right outside.” I tell him and he nods. He looks at me and I smile softly. “I love you.” I tell him and leave the room. I sit outside the room and look up when Morgan comes out.   
“I gave him a minute.” He tells me and sits beside me.   
“Who was Gideon? I mean I know he and my dad started the BAU, but if he was just a co-worker, Spence wouldn’t be taking it this hard.” I say to Morgan, looking at him.   
“I think Spencer say Gideon as a sort of father figure, like you and Rossi, but not as much. A lesser version. Father figure diet.” Morgan says and smiles softly. I laugh softly and nod. “Gideon basically got Spencer on the team. He joined when he was 21 and you have to be 22 to join.”   
“So it’s like he owns his career to Gideon.” I say softly. I lean my head on his shoulder. “I wish I knew what to do or say to make him better.” I say and close my eyes. “I never wanted to see him like this again.”   
“I know Gwen. I know.” He says.   
I sit up as the door opens and I look at Spencer. He looks at me and frowns. I stand up and hug him. “I’m so sorry Spence.” I tell him. He wraps his arms around me.   
“We should get back.” Morgan tells us. We drive back the way we came, Morgan at the wheel with Spencer and I in the back, Spencer’s head on my chest and me running my hands through his hair. We get back and Spencer walks inside. “I hope he comes back to us soon.”   
“Me too.” I say. I get to Hotch. “Where’s my dad?”   
“He is inside.” Hotch tells me. “This is Gideon’s son.” He introduces me to the man beside him.  
I look over and hold out my hand. “Hello. I’m Gwendolyn. Rossi is my father.” I tell him.   
“I didn’t know Rossi had children.” The man says, shaking my hand. “I’m Stephen.”   
“He is adopting me.” I tell him. “I would love to talk more, but I have people in there who need me.” I tell him and go into the house. “Hey dad.” I say as soon as I see Rossi. He is talking to Morgan. I walk up to him and wrap my arms around one of his and sighs. I look up at him. “How are you holding up. I knew you were close with Gideon.” I ask him.   
“I’m doing okay.” He says and smiles softly at me. “How’s Spencer?”   
“I’m not sure. I just wish I knew what to do to make him better.” I say. As soon as I say that, Spencer walks out of the house.   
“Go with him.” Rossi tells me.   
“What about you? I need to be with you too.” I say, frowning. It was so hard trying to help Spencer and Rossi. I needed a twin or clone.   
“He needs you more than I need you right now.” He tells me.   
I sigh and nod. “If you need me, just come find me.” I tell him and chase after Spencer. I find him right outside the door, just standing there. I walk over and take his hand. “I’m sorry that I’m not better at this.”   
“I don’t need you to do anything but be here Lyn.” He tells me softly and squeezes my hand. I nod and squeeze his back. I rest my head on his shoulder.   
Rossi walks out and stands by us. “Take a ride with me you two.” Rossi says and we nod. We all go out to the car and start driving. The men start talking about Gideon and I just sit back and listen. I was here for emotional support, not to say anything. We get to the FBI buildings and we go down into the basements. “This is where it all started.” Rossi tells us.   
I start looking around as they talk. “This place is amazing.” I say softly.   
We figured out the case and we were all were getting ready to go. Spencer goes up to Stephen and hands him something. I am resting my head on Rossi’s shoulder. Spencer goes into the house and I watch him. “Give him time Gattina.” Rossi tells me. I nod and Rossi head to Stephen and talks to him.   
Stephen shakes hands with Rossi and walks past him. “Nice meeting you Gwendolyn. I hope to get to know you better at a better time.” He says to me and smiles softly.   
“Me too, Stephen.” I say. He walks past me and I go to Rossi. “He seems like a nice guy.”   
“He is. You guys can make a child of BAU club.” Rossi jokes.   
I roll my eyes. That was bad, dad.” I tell him, watching Spencer walk out of the house. “I’m going to him.”   
“Sounds good.” He says and stands by Hotch.   
I go Spencer and take his hand. “Come with me for a moment.” I look up at him and say.   
“Okay.” He says and I lead him to the side.   
“How are you doing? Please be honest.” I say and cup his cheek.   
He leans into my hand and closes his eyes. “I’m hurting. I miss him and I didn’t get to say goodbye.” He says and opens his eyes. “I hate that this keeps happening to me. I don’t get to say bye. With Maeve, I didn’t even get to say hello.”   
“I know love. I’m sorry that it keeps happening to you.” I say softly. “I don’t know how to make you feel better.”   
“Stay with me tonight?” He asks me.   
“Of course love.” I say and we head back over to the group. We all get into the cars. “Hey dad, I’m staying at Spencer’s tonight. Will you fine?”   
“Of course sweetie.” He says and smiles back at me. Once we get back to the BAU, we all go our separate ways.   
Spencer and I get to his house. “Go take a bath. I will make us something to eat.” I tell him. He looks at me. “Okay, I’ll order something.”   
“Okay. Thank you, Gwendolyn.” He says softly. He kisses me softly and then heads to the bathroom. I order Chinese and set up a movie and wait for Spencer to get out of the bathroom. I get the food once it arrives and start setting it up in the living room as Spencer comes into the living room. “What did you order?”   
“Chinese.” I say and smile softly.   
“Sounds good.” He says and sits down. I start the movie as we eat our food. We eat in silence. After we finish, I take Spencer’s plate and put it on the table with mine.   
“Lay down and put your head in my lap.” I tell him.   
He lays his head on my lap and closes his eyes. I slowly move my hand through his hair. He sighs and smiles softly. I keep running my hands through his hair until he falls asleep. I lean my head back and fall asleep.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRRSRSRSRSR  
It was a month after Gideon’s death and Spencer was doing better. We were on a case in Wisconsin where the unsub was killing women after tying them up with nylon rope. I was sitting outside the police station, reading the book we found at all the victim’s house, “Bare Reflections”. It was a very dirty book but I wanted to know what was all the hype about. I feel someone sitting next to me. I look over and see a nice looking guy. “How do you like the book?” He asks me.   
“Oh it’s okay. I’m not really into reading smut.” I say and put my book mark in and shut the book. “I’m just reading it for a project.”   
“Oh, what project.” He asks.   
“A need to know.” I say and see Spencer walk out of the station. “Nice talking to you.” I tell him and walk to Spencer.   
‘Who was that?” He asks.   
“No idea. He was asking about the book. It was nothing.” I say and smile. “Were did Hotch send us?”   
“Back to the crime scene.” He says and takes my hand. “Maybe, when we get home after this case, we can do some of those things in the book.”   
“Oh someone is kinky.” I say and laugh as I get into the car.   
Later, I was with Rossi and Kate at the Munch event, but I didn’t want to be in the room with Rossi when he was talking about those kinds of things, so I was sitting outside. I hear someone walking up behind me so I turn around. It was that guy from earlier. “Hey, it’s you from earlier.” He says and walks up to me. “What are you doing out here?”   
“Just checking this place out with my friends. They are right inside. They should be right out.” I say and step closer to the door. Something about him made me feel uneasy. “I should probably get back in to them.” I say and turn towards the door.   
“You aren’t going anywhere.” He says and hits me over the head. I fall to the ground, slowly passing out. “I am going to have fun with you.” He tells me as I pass out.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Criminal Minds

-Spencer’s POV-   
Rossi and Kate get back to the police station. “Where is Lyn?” I ask Rossi.   
He rushes past me and I look at Kate. “She was taken by the unsub.” Kate tells me.   
“Why was she alone? We know that the unsub takes woman.” I ask, rushing to the team. “Why did you let her out of your sight!?” I yell at Rossi.   
“She didn’t want to be in the room so she went outside.” Rossi tells me. I could tell that he was blaming himself, but I was too angry to care.   
“If she dies, it will be your fault.” I tell him and go to Hotch.  
“She wasn’t in her house, so he needs a new place to do his act.” Hotch tells us, looking at me.   
The group tries to figure out to find out who the unsub was. I move over to the window and sigh, placing my head against the window. I could lose another person. If I did, I wouldn’t know what to do. “She will be okay.” Rossi tells me softly. I look up and look at him. He looks like he is in pain. Probably the same way I look. “She is a strong woman.”   
“I'm sorry I blamed you. It's not your fault.” I say softly.   
“I understand Reid. You are angry and sad. How can another person I love get taken is what you are thinking right?” Rossi asks   
I nod and sigh. “I just lost Gideon, I can lose her either.” I say.   
“I know what you mean.” Rossi says and places a hand on my shoulder.   
“We found the unsub guys.” We hear Morgan tell us.   
“Let's go get our girl back.” Rossi says and we head out.   
-Gwen’s POV-   
I wake up in a bedroom. My hands were tied up, as were my feet. I had a piece of duct tape over my mouth. I look around and see the unsub trying to get a young girl on the bed. She was fighting him really hard. I try to get out of my restraints and keep an eye on him. She scratches his neck but that doesn't stop him. I almost get my feet freed when he starts strangling her. I scream into the tape and try to kick the bed to get him to stop. She stop moving and he grins and lays on her. I stop and start sobbing. I knew I was next. I was going to die and I couldn't do anything to stop him. I keep trying to get my feet undone faster when I see a girl standing in the door.   
“Dad?” She asks and the unsub stops. He looks at the girl and gets off of the woman and goes to the girl.   
“Connie.” He says.   
The woman on the bed starts to breath again and gets her mouth clear. She looks at the man and the girl. “Run.” She tells the girl and the girl takes off. The unsub runs after the girl and I finally get my feet undone. I stand my up and look at the woman. I nod at her and runs after the unsub. I couldn't hit him but I was not going to let him hurt that little girl. When I get down there he is running out the back and I could hear sirens. I see Morgan chasing after the unsub and the girl rushes out of the house and I follow her. The girl rushes into Kate's arms and I just stand there and we look at each other.   
Later, the team had come and I was sitting between Rossi and Spencer. I was holding Rossi’s hand and laying my head on Spencer’s shoulder. I was so tired and just wanted to go to the hotel. Rossi and Spencer wanted me to go to the hospital but I wasn't budging. Hotch walks over to us and looks at me. “How are you doing?” He asks.   
“I promise you that I'm fine. He only knocked me out and tied me up. He was waiting till he was done with Charlotte.” I say softly. “I just want to go to sleep.”   
He nods. “Okay. Spencer take her back to the hotel.” Hotch says and goes back to the others.   
I stand up and smile softly. “You heard the man. Let's get out of here.” I say.   
They both get up and Rossi smiles at me. “I'll see you tomorrow.” He says and kisses the top of my head.   
“See you tomorrow dad.” I tell him and Spencer takes me to the hotel. “I want to stay with you.” I tell him and we go to his hotel room. We lay in his bed and I curl up against him.   
“I was so worried about you.” Spencer says as he wraps his arms around me. “I thought I was going to lose another person I love.”  
“You are stuck with me Spencer Reid.” I tell him. I close my eyes and snuggle into him.   
“I love you Gwendolyn.” He says as I fall asleep.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR   
It has been a month since that case and I walk out to the living room one morning and hear some noisemakers go off. I jump and see the whole team in the living, plus their kids. “What is going on?!” I ask, smiling.   
“Its adoption day!” Penny says.   
I look at Rossi. “Really?” I ask.   
“It's happening Gattina.” Rossi says and walks to me. “We are all taking the day off and we are going to the courthouse and getting it done.”   
I grin and hug him. “This is amazing.” I say as the doorbell goes off. I pull away and look at him. “Who would ring the doorbell at this hour? The team is all here.” I say and go to the door. I open it and see Joy and her family. “Joy!” I say and hug her. We had talked a lot since Rossi and I went to her house. We have gotten very close in the time. “I can't believe you guys are here!” I say as I pull back.  
They enter the house and Kai runs to Rossi. “We couldn't miss seeing you become family.” Joy tells me.   
“You guys are the best.” I say and go back to the group.   
“After you get adopted, Penelope has set up a nice little lunch for us.” Rossi tells me.   
“This is amazing.” I say and hug him again.   
“Let get this party moving!” Jack yells and everyone laughs.   
“He just wants cake. We told him not until we get back.” Hotch explains.   
“Well then let's get moving. I want cake too.” I say and smile. We all get to the courthouse and Rossi and I sign the adoption forms and my new birth certificate. I stand in front of the judge.   
“Congratulations Gwendolyn, you are now a Rossi.” The judge tells me.   
I grin and rush to Rossi and hug him. “I’m a Rossi!” I say and grin.   
He hugs back. “You are, Gattina.” He says. “Let’s get back to the house and eat cake.” He pulls back.   
I nod and smile. “Let’s go.” I say and we all go back to the house. We set up in the backyard and I grab a volleyball. “Who wants to play?”   
“I’ll play.” JJ say and smiles at me.   
“Two more people.” I say. “Spence?”   
“Totally not my sport.” He says.   
“What is your sport?” Morgan asks and stands up. “I’ll play.”  
“Hotch? Dad?” I ask.   
“I’ll play.” Joy says and stands up.   
“You three against me.” Morgan says and smiles.   
I look at the other two girls and nod. “You’re on.” I say and go to the serving line. “Ready Morgan?” I ask.   
“Oh course sweet thing.” He says and winks at me. I serve the ball and it lands right by Morgan after he goes for it. “Beginners lucky.” He tells me and rolls it over to me. I serve it again and it lands in the corner of the court, in bounds. “Okay. How are you good at this game?”   
“I love volleyball. It was the only game I ever play.” I tell him. “So I got good in it.”   
“Okay. I won’t be beat. I want to face you alone.” He says.   
“Sounds good to me.” I say and smile. Joy and JJ go sit down and we have everyone’s attention. “Give me the ball.”   
“Nope. We are starting over. I was trying to go easy on you since I didn’t know you were a volleyball rock star, but the baby gloves are off sweet thing.” He says. “Ready?” He asks. I nod and he serves it over to me. I rush and hit it over and get back into place. He hits it up and spikes it over. I dive for the ball and hit it up but I don’t get it over. “Point one Morgan.” He says and laughs.   
“Beginners luck.” I say and stand up. I brush myself off and look at him. “First one to three?” I ask.   
“Whatever you want sweet thing.” He says and I roll the ball over to him. He serves it and I hit up and then hit it again to send it over the net. He hits it and then spikes it. I rush over and hit it up for myself and then spike it over. Morgan tries to walk backwards and falls back before he gets the ball.   
“Point one Gwen.” I say and smirk.   
“It’s on.” Morgan says. We pay two more rounds, the first one where I win and the second one he wins. “Next point wins.” He says.   
“I know.” I say and wipe my brow. I was sweating like crazy. The whole group was watching, even Henry and Jack. “Serve the ball Morgan.” I tell him.   
“Aww are you tired?” He asks. “I’ll beat you quickly then.” He serves the ball and I hit it back over with ease. He hits it up and spikes it over. I quickly rush to it and hit it up. I hit it over the net and he hits it back. I hit it up, set it, and then spike it over to him. He rushes to the ball and hits it back over, hard. I rush over and fall down as I go over and I miss the ball by an inch.   
“Dang!” I say and put my head down, trying to get my breath back.   
“Good game missy.” Morgan says, coming over to me. I turn around and hold out my hand. He takes my hand and pulls me up. “You were good.”   
“I told you.” I say and smile. “You are good too.”   
“I know I am.” He says and puts an arm around my shoulders and we walk to the group. “Is it time for cake?” He asks.   
Rossi laughs. “Yes. Time for cake.” He says and I go to him and we go into the kitchen. We cut the cake and serve it out. The group breaks into smaller groups. I sit by Rossi and Joy. “I am so happy that this year I gained two daughters. I could not be any prouder of you two.” Rossi tells us.   
“We are proud of you dad.” Joy says and smiles at me.   
“You are the best dad ever.” I say and rest my head on his shoulder. I yawn and close my eyes.   
“Are you tired Gattina?” Rossi asks me. I shake my head softly. “I don’t believe you.” He says and laughs.   
“I just need to rest my eyes for a moment.” I say softly.   
“Hey guys, I need to get Henry home for bed.” JJ says and I sit up.   
“I should get Jack home too.” Hotch says.   
“Gwen is tired so that is perfect.” Rossi says and smiles at me.   
I laugh and go around and give hugs to everyone before they leave. “Spence, you want to stay the night?” I ask Spencer as I get to him.   
“Sure.” He says and kisses my head.   
“Gattina, can I talk to you before you and Reid hid for the rest of the night?” Rossi asks me.   
“Sure.” I say.   
“Good night guys. See you in the morning.” Joy says and her and her family go to their rooms.   
“I’ll head to the room.” Spencer says and goes to my room.   
I sit down by Rossi and smile. “This was such a great day.” I say and grin.   
“It was. I am so happy that you are a Rossi.” He says and takes my hand. “Now I know you moved in here because you had to, but you do not have to move out until you are ready. I will never kick you out.” He tells me.   
I nod and smile. “Thanks dad.” I say.   
“And I kind of got you a gift.” He says, pulling a small box from behind him. He hands it to me. “I hope you like it.”   
I open it to see diamond teardrop earrings. “Oh my… these are beautiful.” I say. I look at him. “I can’t accept these.”   
“I want you to have them. They were my mother’s.” He tells me.   
“Shouldn’t you give these to Joy then?” I ask.   
“She is getting the necklace. I figured that you wouldn’t want the necklace because of the one I already gave you.” He says.   
My hand goes to my cat necklace and smile. “I wouldn’t. Thank you dad.” I say softly and hug him. “I will always cherish them.”   
We pull back. “I also have one more for you… well two.” He tells me. “One is also from Reid though.” He pulls a longer box out from behind him and hands it to me. I open it to see a small cat charm bracelet.  
I laugh and take it out. “I love it.” I say and put out my arm. “Put it on me please?” I ask. He nods and puts it on.   
He stands up. “You have to come with me to find the last gift.” He says and I get up. “Now close your eyes.” I close my eyes and he leads me somewhere. I hear a door open and he tells me, “Open your eyes.”   
I do and I see Spencer with a kitten. “Oh my, a kitten.” I say and rush to Spencer. “Whose cat?” I ask Spencer.  
“Yours.” Spencer tells me.   
I look at him and then Rossi. “This little baby is my gift?” I ask. Rossi nods and smiles at me. “Thank you!” I go and hug Rossi and then hug Spencer. “Is it a boy or girl?” I ask.   
“Girl. What are you going to name her?” Rossi asks me.   
“Esmeralda.” I say and take the kitten. I sit on the bed and pet her. She meows at me softly and I grin. “Oh my precious little baby.”   
“I’ll leave you to get attached.” Rossi says. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”   
“Good night dad. Thank you for everything.” I tell him.   
“You are so welcome.” He says and smiles at us. “See you tomorrow Reid.”   
“Good night.” Spencer says as Rossi shuts my door.   
I look at Spencer and grin. “I have a kitten.” I say softly.   
“You do. I helped pick her out. I remember you saying that you wanted a black cat.” He tells me.   
“I do. They are my favorite.” I say and look at him. “I love you.”   
“I love you too.” He says as I yawn. “Let’s get you to bed. Esmeralda will be here in the morning.”   
I nod and set her down. “She is just so cute.” I say.   
“Just like you.” He says and we change. Esmeralda gets into her cat bed on my chair and meows at us. “Good night to you Esmeralda.” He says to the cat.   
I laugh and get into bed. “She is telling us to go to bed.” I say and look at him.   
“So she is.” He says and gets in bed. He wraps his arms around me and kisses my head. “Sleep well, love.”   
“You too.” I say and fall asleep.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
Two months had passed since getting adopted. Things were actually looking up. I have a great boyfriend, a great family, and a great job. I was living a great life. I was staying over at Spencer’s, when I woke up and had to go puke. I rush to his bathroom and puked my dinner out. Spencer came in and held my hair.   
“Are you okay?” He asks me, after I finish.   
I nod. “It’s the time of year when I get really sick. Remember I missed three days of work last year, well that was because I was doing this.” I say and get up. I brush my teeth and look at the clock. “It’s time to get up anyways.”   
“If you are sick, you shouldn’t come to work.” Spencer says, looking concerned.   
“I have a day before it gets really bad. This is just a sign to let me know it’s coming.” I say and leave the bathroom. “I promise you I’ll be fine.” I tell him as I get dressed.   
“If you say so.” He says and gets ready.   
“I really want blueberry pancakes.” I say and go to the kitchen.   
“I thought you hated blueberries?” He asks, following me.   
“No. I just don’t eat them.” I say and start making pancakes. I feel arms wrap around me and I close my eyes. “I love staying here.”   
“Move in.” He says softly.   
I turn around and look at him. “What?” I ask.   
“We have been dating for over a year Lyn. I want to live with you.” He says softly.   
“Can I have a little time?” I ask him.   
“Of course.” He says and kisses my head.   
“I’m not hungry anymore. Do you want these?” I ask him.   
“You know I don’t eat in the morning.” He says and smiles.   
“Okay.” I say and wrap up the batter and put it in the fridge. “Let’s get to work.” We go to work. At the end of the day, I go to JJ, Penny, and Kate. “I hate morning sickness.” Kate says and sighs.   
JJ pulls out a pack of saltine crackers and hands them to Kate. “I still have them in here from when I was pregnant.” She tells us.   
“Lifesaver.” Kate says and takes the crackers.   
“Winnie. You have been in a funk all day. Tell us what is going on.” Penny says.   
“Spence asked me to move in.” I tell them softly.   
“That is great news.” JJ says and smiles.   
“Yeah. I’m just worried. This will change the relationship. I know it will.” I say and sigh. “I love him and I love staying the night but what if this is too fast?”   
“I don’t think it is, but you just need to trust your heart.” Penny tells me.   
“I think it will be good for you two.” Kate tells me. Her phone goes off and she looks it. “That’s weird.”   
“What?” I ask.   
“Meg. We have a code word for emergencies. It’s pepper and she just texted me pep.” Kate tells us. “I’ll be back.”   
I look at the others and frown. Turns out Meg and her friend were taken. It took two days to finally get them both back. I was so tired and a little sick. I had thrown up both mornings but it was the usual all day sickness so I was okay with it. Spencer walks to me after most of the team had left. “I want to see something.” He tells me.   
“Okay?” I ask, not where he was going with this.   
He pulls out a pregnancy test out of his bag. “Take this.” He says.   
“I’m not pregnant Spence.” I say.   
“You have been a little more emotional, you are puking at a certain time each day, and you are more tired. I think it could be this and not your normal sickness.” He says.   
I sigh and nod. “Okay. I’ll take it. Wait here.” I say and start walking to the bathroom.   
“Oh no. I am coming with. I want to find out the same time as you.” He says and follows me into the bathroom.   
“Whatever.” I say and go and take the test. I bring it out and set it on the counter. “Now we wait five minutes.” I say and wash my hands. I look at the ceiling and wait. My timer goes off and I look at Spencer. “You look.” I tell him   
“We both look.” He tells me.   
I sigh and nod. We both look down to see a smiley face. “I’m pregnant.”


	22. Chapter 22

I take the test and throw it away. “Lyn, are you okay?” Spencer asks me, placing a hand on my shoulder. I turn and look at him. “What are you thinking?”   
“I’m not sure right now.” I tell him truthfully. “I mean yay but gah.”   
“Let’s get you home.” He says.   
“I can’t face my dad. Take me to your place.” I say, looking worried. “He will know something is wrong.”   
“Okay.” He says and takes me to his house. “Are you hungry?”   
“No. I just…” I start to say and sit down. “I’m in shock.” I turn to him. “What are your thoughts?”   
“I’m kind of really happy.” He says and smiles. “I want kids and I know we haven’t talked about this, but I am so happy.”   
I sigh and place a hand on my stomach. “There are just so many different factors. Like, who will watch the baby? I want to work, you want to work, your mom is in a different state, and my dad works with us.”   
“I mean we have nine months to think about it. We could hire a nanny or someone to watch the baby. I mean they child centers too.” He says.  
I sigh and nod. “Yeah. How does Hotch do it?” I ask.   
“His sister-in-law watches Jack.” He tells me and I nod. “Is that your only concern?”  
“No.” I sit back on the couch and look at my hands. “I don’t even know if I wanted kids. I mean I love them but I don’t know if I can be a parent.”   
“What do you mean? Of course you can be a parent. You will be a great mom. You are so great Henry and Jack.” He says, trying to comfort me.   
“But I don’t raise them.” I say and look at him. “I don’t know how to do the family thing. I have never had a mom so how can I be a mom.”   
He moves closer and wraps his arms around me. “You are going to just learn it along the way. I really didn’t have my dad so I really don’t know how to be a dad.” He says. “But I know that I have you and you should know that you have me, so we will learn together.”   
I smile softly and nod. “Okay. I will put those fears away until it gets closer.” I say softly.   
He laughs and kisses my head. “There we go.” He says. “Now we need to make a doctor’s appointment.”   
I nod. “We should do that before we tell anyone.” I say and get my phone out. “I’ll call. Can you go re-heat those pancakes I made a little while back?”   
“Oh course, do you want anything on them?” He asks.   
“Butter and strawberry jam.” I tell him. He looks at me and smiles. He gets up and kisses my head. “Thank you.” I tell him as he walks into the kitchen.   
“Anything for you two.” He says and I smile. I hear him getting the stuff ready and I call my woman doctor and set up an appointment. He comes back as I hang up. “All set up?” He asks, handing me the plate.   
I take a bite and smile. “This is perfect.” I tell him and nod. “And yes, it’s for next Thursday at four. I just hope we don’t get a case.”   
“Yeah. That would be bad.” He says and steals a bite from me. “Okay, that isn’t that bad.”   
“I know.” I say and laugh.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
It was the following Thursday and I had been sleeping at Spencer’s because I knew if I was alone with Rossi, I would tell him. I wanted to be 100% sure that I was pregnant before I told him. He didn’t seem bad or upset about me staying at Spencer’s so I was happy about that.  
I kept looking at the clock, counting down to three-thirty. I could see Spencer doing the same. “Okay, why do you two keep looking at the clock?” JJ asks us.   
I look at her and smile. “Spencer is taking me out on a special date.” I lie to her. “He said that we have a special thing at four.”   
“What’s the occasion?” Morgan asks.   
“Nothing. Just wanted to treat my girl.” Spencer says and looks at me. “She deserves it.”   
I look at the clock and see that is was three-thirty. I stand up. “It’s time to go.” I tell Spencer.   
He stands up and rushes to get his stuff packed. He gets it and goes to me. “See you guys tomorrow.” He tells the others and we rush to the car. We get to the doctor’s fifteen minutes later and we get all set up in a room. I was in the chair and Spencer was sitting in a chair next to me.   
The doctor walks in and smiles at us. “Hello you two. I’m Doctor Hansen.” She introduces herself to us.   
“I’m Gwendolyn, but you can call me Gwen, and this is my boyfriend, Spencer.” I tell her.   
“Nice to meet you two. So do you think you know how far along you are?” She asks me.   
“Not really. I didn’t think I was pregnant, I thought it was just my normal yearly sickness. Spencer is the one who figured it out.” I tell her.   
“Okay, well we are testing the urine sample you gave us and I can set up the ultrasound to see if I can tell.” She tells us. She sets the ultrasound up and we look at the screen. We hear a heartbeat coming from the machine. She smiles at us. “That’s the heartbeat of your baby.”   
I tear up and look at Spencer. “That’s our baby.” I say softly and take his hand.   
He was tearing up as well. “That’s our baby.” He says and looks at me. “We have a baby.” He kisses me softly.   
“The baby isn’t big enough to see on screen yet, so we will save the photo until later, but you are at six weeks Gwen.” The doctor tells me as she puts the ultrasound away and helps me clean up. “I want to see you in four weeks. I’ll let you set it up with the nurses out front.” She tells me.   
“Sounds great.” I say and stand up. “Thank you Doctor Hansen.”   
“Of course. See you in a month.” She tells us and leaves the room.   
I look at Spencer and grin. “We are going to have a baby.” I say and hug him.   
He hugs back and then pulls away. “When are we telling everyone?” He asks as we walk to the front.   
“Well I was thinking of telling Penny and having a little surprise party tomorrow?” I suggest.   
“That is perfect.” He says and we make the next appointment.   
We get to his house and I call Penny. “Hey girly. How was Spencer’s little surprise?” She asks when she answers the phone.   
“Well we actually lied. Spencer wasn’t treating me. I had an appointment.” I tell her.   
“What? Are you okay? Is it curable?” She asks frantically.   
“Penny. It’s nothing bad. Now I am going to tell you something and you can’t tell anyone else.” I tell her.   
“Okay I promise I won’t.” She says.   
“I’m pregnant.” I tell her. She squeals and I laugh. “You are the first person to know. I want to throw a little surprise party telling the team tomorrow.” I tell her.   
“And you want me to help?” She asks.   
“Exactly.” I tell her.   
“Leave it all to me. I will have it set up in the morning. Just come in a little early so you can be in the conference room before anyone else.” She tells me.   
“Okay. I will see you then.” I tell her.   
“I’m going to be an aunty!” She says and laughs. “I’m going to plan so I’ll talk to you later.”   
“Okay, thank you Penny.” I say.   
“Anything for you Winnie.” She tells me and hangs up.   
“Well, Penny is setting everything up so we get to have our own celebration tonight.” I tell Spencer and we go to the bedroom.   
The next morning, Spencer and I get to the offices and see Penny. “Come on Winnie!” She calls to us and we all go to the round table room.   
I look around to see pink and blue balloons all around the room. There was a banner saying ‘Expecting the newest team member soon’ and food on the table. “This is amazing Penny. You did a great job.” I tell and hug her.   
She hugs back and then pushes Spencer and I under the banner. “The team will be here any minute. You guys were not that early.” She tells us.   
“I had morning sickness and I woke up like fifty times to pee last night.” I tell her.   
“What is this?” We hear Rossi say. I look at him and smile. “Gattina. Is there something you need to tell me?”   
I grin and nod. “I’m pregnant dad.” I tell him.   
He drops his briefcase and rushes over and hugs Spencer and I. “This is amazing news Gattina. I am so happy for you.” He tells me.   
“Thanks dad.” I tell him.   
“Thanks Rossi.” Spencer says.   
We pull back and Rossi sits down as the rest of the team. “Surprise.” I say as they walk in.   
“What is this?” Morgan asks.   
“I’m pregnant.” I say and grin. The team rushes over and tells us congrats and we have a little party. We eat the breakfast and cake Penny brought. I watched JJ open a bag of Cheetos and then throw them away, looking sick. I frown and go to her. “Can we talk. I need some help.” I ask. She nods and we go to the women’s bathroom. “How far along are you?” I ask her as soon as we were alone.   
“How did you know?” She asks.   
“I saw you eat those crackers you offered Kate yesterday and then I just saw you throw a bag of Cheetos away uneaten. I know you would never do that without a major reason, so I guessed.” I told her.   
“You have gotten good at this profiler thing.” She tells me and sits on the sink. “I just found out a couple weeks ago. I’m eight weeks.”   
“I’m six.” I tell her and grin. “Your babies can grow up together.” I say.   
“That is amazing!” She says.   
“Congrats JJ. When were you going to tell us?” I ask.   
“Soon. I was thinking today but then you did your annocement and I didn’t want to take your spotlight.” She tells me.   
“Oh you are telling people today.” I tell her and we go back to the round table room. “Guy. We have an annocesment.”   
Everyone looks over and JJ smiles. “I’m also pregnant.” She tells everyone. Everyone comes over and hugs her.   
We finish our little celebration after a couple hours and finish the day with paperwork.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
It has been ten months and I was splitting my time between Rossi’s and Spencer’s house. Spencer and I were finding out what the gender of the baby was today. We were waiting in the room for Doctor Hansen to come in. I had a bigger bump now and I was needing to go shopping. I planned a shopping day set up with the girls. JJ was getting big too. It was great to have this experience with someone else who was understanding what I was going through. I had Spencer to help me but he didn’t understand the pain of having to pee every three minutes or the strange food cravings. Luckily we were done with that trimester, but it was still difficult.   
Doctor Hansen walks in and smiles at us. “How is my favorite couple?” She asks as she comes in.   
I grin. “So glad I’m done with the morning sickness and the constant peeing.” I tell her and laugh.   
She sits down and laughs. “That is the worst part.” She says and sets up the ultrasound equipment. “Are two wanting to find out the gender if you can?”  
I look at Spencer. “Are we?” I ask.   
“I want to, if you do.” He says.   
“I want to.” I say and look at Doctor Hansen. “We want to.”   
“Okay. Let’s see if baby Reid will let us see.” She says and start moving the wand around my stomach. After a second, the baby’s heartrate comes from the machine.   
“I love that sound. If I could always hear that sound, it would be amazing.” I say.   
Doctor Hansen smiles at me. “It is a great sound and it sounds really healthy.” She says and looks at the screen. “Okay you two, you are having a baby girl.” She tells us and smiles.   
I grin and look at Spencer to see him grinning. “A girl.” I say and take his hand. “We are going to have a baby girl.”   
He leans down and kisses me. “This is amazing.” He says and laughs.   
Doctor Hansen smiles at us and wipes me off. “Do you guys have any question?” She asks us and we shake our heads. “Well congrats and I will see you in a month.” She says and leaves the room.   
“We are having a girl.” I say and stand up.   
“We are.” He says and kisses my head. “Let me take you out tonight.”  
“Okay, where to?” I ask.   
“What are you in the mood for?” He asks.   
“Steak.” I say and smile.   
“Okay, I have a place.” He says. He brings me home and I change into a dress that still fit me. “You ready?” Spencer asks as I put make-up on.   
“Almost. Just getting my make-up on.” I tell him. He walks in and smiles at me.   
“You look beautiful.” He tells me and I get up.   
I go over to him and wrap my arms around him. “Why thank you, kind sir.” I tell in a fake southern accent.   
He laughs and wraps his arms around me. “You ready?” He asks.   
“Yes sir.” I say and kisses my head. “You are going to have to wait for two girls to get ready in the future.”   
“And I can’t wait.” He says and leads me to the car. We get in and drive to a nice restaurant. We get into the restaurant and he pulls the chair out for me.   
“Thank you Spence.” I say and sit down. He sits down and we have dinner.   
“Want to split a slice of cake?” Spencer asks as we finish our meal.   
“Sure, I can eat.” I say and Spencer asks the waiter for a piece of chocolate cake.  
The waiter comes back with a plate and two forks. He sets the plate down, and on the edge of the plate, in chocolate, it says ‘Will you marry me, Gwen?’ I look over and see Spencer holding a ring and on one knee. “Gwendolyn Rossi. I love you more than anything in this life, other than our unborn baby. You have been my comfort when my life hasn’t been well and I want you always there. Lyn, will you marry me?” He asks, looking up at me.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you CapriciousUke for commenting on my story. They have made my day!   
> Please read and comment to let me know what you think! I would very much enjoy them.   
> I don't own Criminal Minds.

I grin and nod. “Yes.” I say and hold out of my hand. He places the ring on my finger and stands up. I stand up and hug and kiss him. “How long have you been planning this?” I ask.   
“A while. Rossi helped me out.” He tells me and just holds me against him.   
“My dad knows?” I ask.   
“Oh course. I wanted to get his blessing before I did anything.” He says and kisses my forehead. “We have to go over there before we go home.”   
“I want to officially move in with you.” I tell him.   
“Really?” He asks and I nod. “Fantastic.” He pulls back. “Let’s eat this and then go see your dad.” We sit down and finish the dinner. We head to Rossi’s after Spencer pays and gets a camera back from a waiter who he asked to take photos.   
We get to Rossi’s and I walk in. “Padre?” I call out in Italian. Rossi was teaching me some Italian for fun.   
“Gattina, cucina.” He calls out.   
“Kitchen.” I say and we head to the kitchen. “Hey dad.” I say when I see him.   
Rossi gets up and hugs both of us. “How is my grandchild doing?” He asks and smiles.   
“She is doing good.” I tell him, slipping in the gender.   
“The baby is a girl?” Rossi asks, looking up at me.   
“She is.” I say and Rossi hugs me again.   
“This is amazing.” Rossi says and smiles at Spencer. “Did you do it?”   
“I did. She said yes.” Spencer tells Rossi.   
“Congrats you two.” He says and kisses both of our cheeks. “Does this mean that you are moving in with Spencer?” He asks me.   
I nod. “I’ll be back to visit and we work together so we see each other all the time.” I say.   
“I’m not worried about not seeing you Gattina.” He says and smiles. “I know you will visit.” I yawn and lean against Spencer. “You two should get home.”   
“This one needs sleep.” Spencer says and wraps an arm around my waist.   
“Come for breakfast tomorrow.” Rossi tells us and kisses my cheeks.   
“Will do.” I say and hug him. “I love you dad.”   
“I love you too Gattina.” He says. We go back home and go to sleep.   
SRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSRSR  
I was in my thirty-first week and I was huge. “Spence. I can’t get up again.” I call out. “Please come help.” I was laying on my back because it was the only position I could sleep in. He walks in and smiles at me. “Help me.”   
“You need to stop laying like this Lyn.” He says and helps me up. He kneels down in front of me.   
“It’s the only way I can sleep Spence. It’s weird to sleep in any other position.” I say and look at him.   
“I bought the body pillow to help with that.” He says.   
“It doesn’t work.” I say and frown. “I’m sorry Spence.”   
“Why are you sorry?” He asks, placing a hand on my cheek. I lean into his hand. “There is no reason to be sorry.”   
“I’m such a pain.” I say and sigh. “I am a balloon.” I say and look at my stomach.   
“You are a very sexy balloon.” He says and kisses my forehead. I push him away and laugh. “You are not a pain love. You are carrying our child and for that, you will never be a pain.”   
“I just want the baby out.” I say, holding out my hands for help up. “Help me.”   
He pulls me up and kisses my head. “What to see what I have been up to?” He asks.   
“Of course. Lead the way.” I tell him. He leads me to his office and turns to me. “Why are we at your office?” I ask.   
“Well I changed it up. It’s not my office anymore.” He says and opens the door. I walk in the room and look around. “What do you think?”   
I look around at the nursery that Spencer created. Two of the walls were a lavender and the other ones were a cream color. Spencer had set up a crib, a shelf, a rocking chair, dresser, a baby swing, and a changing table. “When did you do this?” I ask, looking at him.   
“Morgan, Penelope, and Rossi came over a lot of times when you were taking your naps. They wanted to help.” He explains. I look around at the walls. “Penelope decorated the walls. I picked the ceiling though.” He tells me. I look up to see starts and the moon. “It’s a couple constellations because I know you love looking at the stars.”   
I look at him and smile. “Oh Spence. This is amazing.” I say and hug him.   
“The only thing missing is her name on the wall.” He says and wraps his arms around me. “We need to decide that.”   
“Well we both agree with Diana as a middle name but we can’t agree on the first name.” I say and look at him.   
“What is wrong with Lily?” He asks.   
“I like Anastasia.” I say. “Maybe we should ask the team to see what they like.” I suggest.   
“Okay. We will ask at the dinner tonight.” Spencer says. Rossi was having a baby shower tonight for JJ and me. “You should get ready for that.” He says.   
“It’s so hard to put my shoes on though. Can I go barefoot?” I ask.   
He laughs and shakes his head. “I will help you put on your shoes.” He says.   
I nod and head to the bedroom. I get dressed in one of the outfits that the girls helped me find. I was needing new outfits almost every two weeks. I look at myself to the side and place a hand on the bump. “I can’t wait to meet you baby girl.”   
“I can’t wait to meet her too.” Spencer says and wraps his arms around me. “Ready for the shoes?”   
“Yes please.” I say and sit on the bed. I move my feet out and watch him put my shoes on. “You are amazing.”   
“I know.” He says and smiles at me. “Only nine more weeks, love.”   
“Nine more weeks.” I say, getting up after Spencer finishes putting my shoes on. “Let’s head over to my dad’s. Joy will be there.”   
We get over to Rossi’s and walk (or waddle in my case) around and talk with everyone. “Everyone! We need your opinions.” Spencer tells everyone before JJ and I started to open gifts. “Lyn and I have different names we like, and we want your opinion.” He tells everyone.   
“I like Anastasia Diana and Spencer likes Lily Diana. I want opinions.” I say.   
“Anastasia.” Penny says.   
“Yes. Anastasia.” Joy says.   
“I like Lily better.” Hotch says.   
“Cousin Lily!” Henry yells.   
“Anastasia.” Will says.   
“Lily.” JJ says.   
“I agree with JJ.” Morgan says.   
“Lily.” Jack says.   
“Sorry Gattina, I like Lily better.” Rossi says and smiles.   
“And we have a winner!” Spencer says and smiles.   
I frown and look at Spencer. “Okay, her name is Lily.” I say and smile. “It is a good name.”   
“Morgan, will you come over tomorrow and help me paint some letters and hang them up?” Spencer asks.   
“Sure. I will be there in the morning now that baby mama knows about the baby room.” Morgan says and smiles at me.   
“Thank you so much gu-“ I start to say and grab my stomach.   
“Lyn? What’s wrong?” Spencer asks me.   
“It’s nothing Spence.” I say softly, looking at him. I smile softly. “It was probably just Lily moving around.”   
“Are you sure?” He asks, kneeling down.   
I smile at him. “I’m sure.” I say and rub my stomach. “She is just moving around. She is having a party of her own.” I say and look at the others. “Let’s get to opening presents.” I say and take a present. I look up and see everyone looking at me. “I swear I am fine.” I try to tell them. “Please don’t worry. I will be fine.” I tell them. “Can JJ and I open presents or no?” I ask.   
“Yes. Sorry Gattina. We just want you two to be safe.” Rossi says. “Are you sure you are okay?” He asks.   
“Yes, I promise you.” I say and take his hand. “Your granddaughter is fine.”   
“Okay, let’s get to opening presents.” JJ says and we open presents. After we finish, we all get cake and Henry and Jack play in the living room, while the adults sat around watching them. “Gwen, are you sleeping?” JJ asks me.   
“I sleep on my back. Spence bought me a body pillow but it doesn’t help.” I tell her. “And with the shortness of breath, it makes it even harder to sleep.”   
“I can understand that. I can only sleep on my right side with this one. I also have a body pillow and I don’t like using it.” JJ says and laughs.   
“Well I need to pee for the sixtieth time today.” I say and look at Spencer. “Can you help me up again Spence.”   
“Of course.” He says, standing up. He holds out his hands and I take them. He pulls me up and smiles. “Let’s get you to the restroom.”   
“Gwen…” Penny says and I look at her. “You’re bleeding.”   
“What?” I ask and turn around. I look at the couch and see a blood stain. “What?” I ask and feel lightheaded. “Spencer…” I say softly and grip his arm. “I’m in pain.” I say softly.   
Spencer wraps his arms around me. “Penelope call the hospital. Tell them that we are on our way. Explain what happened.” Spencer tells Penelope. “Morgan. Help me get her into the car.” Spencer looks at me. “Gwendolyn, please stay awake. I need you to keep your eyes open and on me.” He says to me and I nod. I feel another pair of arms around me and I feel myself get lifted. “We need to hurry.”   
“Spence…” I say softly and takes his hand. “Lily.” I say and start crying softly. “Take care of her.” I say as I am put into the back of our car.   
Spencer moves in beside me. “Don’t say that Gwen. We will both take care of her.” He tells me. I lay my head on his shoulder and close my eyes. “Do not close your eyes Gwendolyn Rossi. Don’t you dare open your eyes.”   
I open them and look up at him. “I’m in pain.” I say softly. “I was hurting for a while.”   
“It will be okay Gwendolyn, I promise you.” He says softly. “Morgan drive faster!”   
I try to keep my eyes open. “Spencer, I can’t feel Lily moving.” I say and start to panic. “I’ve been trying to follow her moving but she hasn’t moved since I stood up.” I say and start to cry.   
“She will be fine Gwendolyn. I know she will be fine.” He tells me and rubs my back.   
We get to the hospital and Morgan picks me up. “Oh come on sweet thing. You have to be strong.” He says and brings me in. “Hey! We need help!” Morgan calls out. Nurses and Doctors come to us and puts me on a gurney.   
“Get Miss Rossi to ER room 2 right away.” The doctor says and I get wheeled down the hall. “Miss Rossi, we have to have an emergency delivery right away.” The doctor tells me. “Do you want the father to be in the room?” He asks.   
I nod. “Spencer Reid. He is outside.” I tell him and close my eyes as I get pushed into a room. The nurses get me ready and Spencer rushes in and comes to me. “Spencer.” I say and start crying.   
“It’s okay Gwen. It will be okay. I’m here.” He tells me and takes my hand.   
Doctor Hansen rushes in and smiles. “Hello Gwen and Spencer. We need to get this show on the road faster than normal.” She says and sits down. “Okay Gwen. I need you to push, now.” She tells me. I push and squeeze Spencer’s hand. “Good, keep pushing.” I push for almost ten minutes before Doctor Hansen tells me. “Okay, baby Reid is here.” She tells me and takes the baby to the side.   
I try to look at Lily but I can’t see anything. “Why isn’t she crying?” I ask and start crying more. “She is supposed to be crying.”   
A nurse walks over to me and smiles at me softly. “We are doing everything we can Miss Rossi.” She tells me. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”   
“No. I want my baby.” I say and try to look at Lily. “I need my baby.”   
“Gwen, I need you to calm down. Please calm down.” Spencer says and looks at me.   
“If you don’t calm down, you could go into shock and get hurt Miss Rossi.” The nurse tells me.   
“Gwen, I need you to calm down. Please for me and Lily.” Spencer says and pushes my hair back. “Please calm down.”   
I look at him and frown. I nod and sigh. “O-Okay.” I say and close my eyes. The nurse wheels me into a room and I curl up. “What if she dies Spencer?” I ask, looking at him.   
“She isn’t going to die Gwen. I promise you that.” He looks at me and kisses my eyes.   
“I didn’t tell anyone that I was hurting. I thought it was just those Braxton things.” I say and sigh. “I just thought it was just those, not that she was dying.”   
“She isn’t dying.” He says. “Please don’t think that.”   
The door opens and Doctor Hansen walks in. “How are you doing Gwen?” She asks.   
“How is my baby? Where is Lily?” I ask, sitting up.   
Doctor Hansen look at me and frowns. “I’m sorry Gwen and Spencer. She was dead when she was born.” She tells me softly.   
My mind goes blank and I lay down. “Lyn?” I hear Spencer ask me softly but I couldn’t concentrate on him. I curl up and just look at the wall.   
-Spencer’s POV-   
When Doctor Hansen said what she had said, it felt as if my brain shut down. I couldn’t think and I wanted to just cry right there, but I knew I had to be strong for Gwen. I look at her and frown. “Lyn?” I say and place a hand on her shoulder. She didn’t move or look at me. “Gwendolyn, I need to go tell the others, will you be okay?” She still doesn’t answer me or move. I sigh and get up. “I love you Gwendolyn.” I tell her and kiss her head.   
I go to the waiting room and see the others. “How is Gwen and Lily?” Rossi asks as I walk to them. He meets me half way.   
“Gwen is fine. She is in bed, resting.” I tell him and frown.   
“And Lily?” He asks.   
I look down. “She didn’t make it.” I say softly.   
“Oh god.” Rossi says and sighs. “What room is she in?”   
“423.” I say softly. He rushes off and I go and sit by the others. “She wasn’t born alive.” I say softly and look down. “My daughter didn’t even get a look at the world before she died.” I break down and feel a hand on my back. “My poor daughter.”   
-Gwen’s POV-   
I watched Spencer leave the room and I just curl up more and close my eyes. I couldn’t believe that this was happening. It was my fault. If I hadn’t waited, then my Lily wouldn’t be dead. I start crying again and trying to stop thinking her. The door opens and Rossi walks in.   
“Oh Gattina…” He says softly and rushes over to me. He sits down and takes my hands. “My poor child.” He says and sighs. “I am so sorry for what you are going through.” I just look at the wall and try to keep my tears away. “I haven’t told you this but I had a son. He passed away soon after he was born. I can’t totally understand what you are going through, but I can understand part of what you are going through Gattina.” His thumb rubs the side of my hand. “You need to talk to us though. Either me or Spencer or someone. Just talk to us.”  
“It’s my fault.” I say softly. I look at him and frown. “I just didn’t want to worry anyone over nothing. I didn’t think it was anything.” I say and feel some tears escaping my eyes.   
“Gattina. It wasn’t your fault. I am so sorry Gwendolyn.” He says and I just close my eyes. “This was not your fault.”   
“What if it was?” I ask.   
“It wasn’t.” He tells me.   
“I’m tired. Can I be alone?” I ask him.   
“Of course. Just be sure to talk to us if you need to.” He tells me and kisses my head. “Get some sleep.” I nod and curl up. I close my eyes and fall asleep.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry guys for not writing this sooner. I got discouraged and felt like I shouldn’t continue this. But today I felt like you guys deserved more, so here is the next chapter of the story. I am planning to continue this till the show ends, but I am not sure. I will try and not leave you guys hanging. This chapter is dealing with the aftermath of the last chapter. This chapter will be sad and might be a trigger so read at your own warning. Thank you for reading after this long wait! Please read and comment!

-Spencer’s POV-   
It had been a month since Gwen had lost the baby. We had a small burial ceremony with the BAU group. It was the only time I have seen Gwen cry. It was worried about how she was not letting her emotions go and she was holding them all in. I got Gwen to go see a therapist once a week. I was hoping that it would help her faster, but it seemed like it wasn’t doing any good. I knew that Gwen needed time to morn in her own way. I didn’t want her to rush things or block things to make everything the same way it was, but I wanted her to be okay. Hotch let me have the whole month off, but he needed me to get back to work. I was worried about leaving Gwen, but I had to get back to work. “You sure you don’t mind me going back?” I ask Gwen. She was sitting on the couch in the sweats she had been wearing most days. I was very worried about her. “Why don’t you come with me? The team hasn’t seen you in a while and I’m sure that they miss you.”   
“I don’t want to go out.” She says to me, while staring at the television. I knew she wasn’t watching it. She would just stare at the television and ignore everything.   
“The therapist says it’s good to get out.” I tell her. “She says that it will be good to see people and talk to others.”   
“I don’t want to see anyone.” She says and wraps a blanket around herself.   
“I know Rossi is missing you. Talking on the phone isn’t good enough for him.” I say and sit by her. I take her hand. “Please.”   
She signs and gets up. “Okay. I’ll go but I’m not changing.” She tells me.   
We get to the BAU and see everyone around JJ. I didn’t know that she was coming back today. Gwen sees JJ and stops. She turns around and wrap my arms around her. “I can’t go over there!” She whispers to me.   
“You can Lyn. You are stronger than this.” I tell her. She signs and I lead her over to the group. “Hey guys. Guess who I brought along.”   
“Gattina!” Rossi says. He comes over and hug her. She pats his back with one hand and then leaves her hands on the sides of her body. He pulls back and smiles softly. “How are you doing?” She shrugs. “Joy is coming in. She will be so happy to see you.”   
“Why don’t we see the others?” I say and lead her to the others. “Hey guys.”   
“Hey pretty girl.” Morgan says and ruffles her hair.   
“Gwen.” JJ says and hugs her. Lyn pulls out of the hug and looks down. JJ frowns and looks at me. I frown and sigh. “How are you feeling?”   
“Fine.” Gwen says and crosses her arms.   
“Dad.” I hear Joy say as she comes in. I wrap an arm around Gwen. Joy walks to Gwen and smiles. “Hey sis. Are you back to work?” Joy asks.   
“No.” Gwen asks and moves closer to me. “Can I go home. I came out and I’m ready to go home.”   
I frown and sigh. “Why don’t you stay for a little longer?”   
“I want to go home.” She says and looks at the ground. “I don’t want to see people. I want to go home now Spencer.”   
I sign and nod. “Okay. Let me tell Hotch that I will be right back.”   
“No. I can get home by myself.” She tells me.   
I frown. “Okay, but call me when you get there.” She nods. She says bye to Joy and Rossi and then leaves. I go to JJ and smile softly. “I didn’t know you were coming back today.”   
“Yeah. I didn’t know you were coming in or bringing Gwen.” JJ tells me.   
“I just thought this would help her, but all it did was bring her more pain.” I say and sigh.   
“Okay team, sorry to break up the fun, but we have a case.” Hotch says. 

-Gwen’s POV-   
I get home and sit on the couch. I knew I was being unreasonable, but I didn’t feel like doing anything. All I want to do is cry and sit on the couch. I knew that Spencer wanted me to be more like the old me but I don’t think I could ever be like her. It felt like I was a different person now and I couldn’t change anything. I missed the team, but seeing JJ, knowing she had a healthy baby, felt like a knife in my heart. I lay down on my side and close my eyes. Next thing I know, I feel a hand on my shoulder. I jump up and see Spencer. “Hello.” I say and try to smile, but it doesn’t last.   
“Hey sweetie.” Spencer says and sits next to me. “How was your day?”   
“I slept.” I tell him and sigh.   
“So I have a suggestion. My mom isn’t doing so well and I was thinking that we could go visit her. It would be a change of scenery and would give us time away from it all. What do you think?” He asks me.   
“That might be a good idea. I haven’t seen your mom in a while.” I say and lean my head on his shoulder. “I know I’ve been a pain and I’m sorry.”   
“Don’t be sorry love. You are not a pain. We lost our baby girl and it is a hardship we will get through together.” He says and kisses my head. “I already talked to Hotch. We are going to be there for two months.”   
“That sounds good.” I look at him and frown. “What is wrong with your mom?”   
“Her mind is becoming more deteriorated and the employees have been having to restrain her at certain points.” Spencer tells me. “They think that they might have to change her medications.”   
“I’m sorry Spencer. When did you find this out?” I ask.   
“They called yesterday and I called my mom today and asked if it would be okay if you and I came to visit.” He tells me. “Why don’t we go pack?”   
I nod and stand up. “When do we leave?” I ask.   
“As soon as possible.” He says and we go and pack.  
We get to Las Vegas and check into a hotel. “Do you want to get dinner or go see my mom?”  
“Let’s go see my mom. Maybe they will let us take her out.” Spencer says and we head to the place his mom is staying. “We are here to see Diana Reid.” We get taken to her room and we enter. “Hey mom.” Spencer says to Diana, who was sitting on a loveseat by the window.   
She looks at us and frowns. “Is it time for my medication?” She asks us.   
Spencer frowns and shakes his head. “Mom, it’s me Spencer, your son.” He tells her and goes and kneels down by her. She looks at him and he frowns.   
She looks at him and smiles. “Spencer! When did you get here?” She asks and places a hand on his cheek.   
“I just got here mom.” He tells her and smiles. “I brought Lyn along.”   
She looks over at me and smiles. “Gwen. Come over here sweetie.” She tells me and I walk over to her, sitting on the loveseat. We talked with Diana for an hour and I could even tell something wasn’t right. She was needed to be reminded of things that were common knowledge. I yawn and Spencer looks at me.   
“Mom, it’s getting late and I know Lyn is getting tired. We will come tomorrow morning and take you out to breakfast.” Spencer says and we get up.   
I go and hug Diana. “You are the best thing to happen to my Spencer.” She tells me softly.   
“Thank you Diana. I will be so happy to be your daughter in law.” I tell her and stand up.   
“Tomorrow morning, we are getting a big breakfast. You are too tiny Spencer.” She tells Spencer after he hugs her.   
He laughs and nods. “Sounds good mom. You sleep well.” He tells her and we leave the room. We go to the nurse’s desk on our way out. “Is my mom’s doctor here?” He asks one of the nurses.   
“Not today Mr. Reid. He will be in tomorrow morning and you can ask him questions then.” The nurse tells us.   
“Thank you.” Spencer says and we go back to the hotel. By this point, I was exhausted. I kept yawning. “Thank you for coming with me Lyn.” Spencer tells me as I lay on the bed. I look up at him and nod. He lays down next to me. He looks at me and smiles softly. “We will get past this all my love.” He places a hand on my stomach and kisses my cheek. “Is there anything I can do to help you?”   
I look at him. “I should be asking you the same thing. I’m not the only one to lose a child.” I tell him and place a hand on his cheek. “What can I do to help you?”   
“I just want you to be as happy as you were.” He tells me. “I want to do anything in my power to make you as happy.”   
“I just need time Spence. I want to be happy but I keep thinking about Lily and how she never got to see the world and the world never got to see her.” I say, feeling my eyes fill up with tears. “She would have been the best little girl in the whole world. She would have been so smart and amazing. Why do bad things keep happening?” I start crying all the tears that I have been holding in for a long time. I didn’t want to feel weak or make Spencer feel bad. I feel him rub my back and I slowly fall asleep.


End file.
